fon : rag of memory left; and my friends have all forfaken me, except Mrs. Whiteway, who preferves fome pity for my condition; and a few others, who love wine that costs them nothing. As to my taking a journey to Cavan, I am juft as capable as of a voyage to China, or of running races at Newmarket. But to fpeak in the Latinitas Grattaniana, Tu clamas meretrix primus; for we have all expected you here at Eafter, as you were used to do Your mufter roll of meat is good, but of drink in fup port able. Yew wann twine. My ftrefs Albavia has eaten here all your hung beef, and faid it was very good. The affair of high importance in their family is, that Mifs Molly hath iffued out orders, with great penalties, to be called Mrs. Harriwhich caufeth many fpeck you'll ash owns. I am now come to the noli me tan jerry, which begg inns wyth Mad dam. So I will go on, by the strength of my own wit, upon points of the highest imp or taunts. I have been very curious in confidering that fruitful word ling; which explains many fine qualities in ladies; fuch as, grow ling, ray ling, tip ling, (feldom) toy ling, mumb ling, grumb ling, cur ling, pufs ling, bufs ling, flrow ling, ramb ling, quarry ling, tat ling, whiff ling, dabb ling, doub ling. Thefe are but as ample o fan hunn dread mower: they have all got cold this winter, big owing tooth in lick lad ink old wether, and dare ink you rabble. Well, I triumph over you, Is corn urine cap a city. Pray tell me, does the land of Quilca pay any rent? or is any paid by the tenant? or is there not any part of 50 1 to be got ? But before you make complaints of ill payments from your school, I will declare I was never fo ill paid as now, even by my richer debtors I have finished my bill for the last time; wherein I left fome little legacy, which you are not to receive till you shall be entirely out of my debt, and paid all you owe me to my executors. And I have made very very honourable mention of you in the will, as the confideration of leaving thefe legacies to you. Explain this proverb. Salt dry fifb, and the wedding-gold, is the vice of women both young and old. Yes, you have it i nam o mento time. The old huncks Shepherd has buried his only fon, who was a young huncks come to age. POSTSCRIPT. Here is a rhyme; it is a fatire on an inconftant lover. You are as faithlefs as a Carthaginian, To love at once Kate, Nell, Doll, Martha, Jenny, Anne. EGO A fpecimen of Latinitas Grattaniana. GO ludam diabolum fuper duos baculos cum te. Profecto ego dabo tibi tuum ventrem plenum legis. Quid peftis velles tu effe apud? Ego faciam te fumare. Duc uxorem veni fuper. Ego dabo tibi pyxidem in aure. Ego faciam te fecare faltum Veni, veni, folve tuum fcotum, et fac non plura verba. Id eft plus expenfi quam veneratio. Si tu es pro lege, dabo tibi legem, tuum ventrem plenum. Ut diabolus voluit habere id. Quid eft materia tecum? Tu habes vetus proverbiam fuper tuum latus: Nihil eft nunquam in periculo. Cape me apud illud, et fufpende me. Ego capio te apud tuum verbum. Tu venis in farti tempore. Eft formofus corporatus homo in facie. Morfus: Efne tu ibi cum tuis urfis? Ego amo mendacem in meo corde, et tu aptas me ad crinem. Ego dicam tibi quid: Hic eft magnus clamor, et parva lana. Quid! tu es fuper tuum altum equum. Tu nunquam fervasti tuum verbum. Hic eft diabolus et omne agere. Vifne tu effe tam bonus, quam tuum verbum? Ego fervo hoc pro pluviofo die. Ego poffum facere id cum digito madido. Tu eft homo extranei renis. Precor, ambula fuper. Ego intro non in tuas querelas. Ego feci amorem virgini honoris. Quomodo venit id circum, quod tu ludis ftoltum ita? Vos ibi, fac viam pro meo domino. Omnes focii apud pedem pilam. Fœminæ et linteum afpiciunt optime per candelæ lucem. LET I LETTER CXXXVII *. Dr. SWIFT to Dr. SHERIDAN. Will on Monday (this is Saturday, May 22. ass you will read below in the date) fend or talk to Mr. Smith: but I diftruft your fanguinity fo much, (by my own defponding temper), that I know not whether that affair of your jufticeship be fixed; but I fhall know next week, and write or act accordingly. I battled in vain with the Duke and his clan against the lowering of gold, which is just a kind fettlement upon England of 25,000 1. a-year for ever. Yet fome of my friends differ from me, tho' all agree that the abfentees will be just fo much gainers. I am exceffively glad that your difficulty of breathing is over; for what is life but breath? I mean not that of our noftrils, but our lungs You must in summer ride every half-holiday, and go to church every Sunday fome miles off. The people of England are copying from us to plague the clergy; but they intend far to outdo the original. I wish I were to be born next century, when we fhall be utterly rid of parfons, of which, God be thanked, you are none at prefent; and until your Bishop give you a living, I will leave off (except this letter) giving you the title of Reverend. I did write him lately a letter with a witnefs, relating to his printer of quadrille, (did you ever fee it ?), with which he half ruined Faulkner. He promises (against his nature) to confider him; but interpofed an excep * This fhould have been dated 22d May 1737, but is not. Mrs. tion, which I believe will deftroy the whole. Whiteway gives herself airs of loving you; but do not truft her too much; for fhe grows difobedient, and fays, fhe is going for to get another favourite. In fhort, fhe calls you names, and has neither Mr. nor Dr. on her tongue, but calls you plain Sheridan, and pox take you. She is not with me now, elfe the would read this in spite of me, and, between ourselves, fhe fets up to be my governor. I wish you had fent me the Chriftian name of Knatchbull, and I would have writ to him; but I will fee him on Monday, if he will be visible. The poem on the legion-club is fo altered and enlarged, as I hear, (for I only faw the original), and fo damnably murdered, that they have added many of the club to the true number. I hear it is charged to me, with great perfonal threatnings from the puppies offended. Some fay they will wait for revenge to their next meeting; others fay the privy-council will fummon the fufpected author. If I could get the true copy, I would fend it you. Your Bifhop writes me word, that the real author is manifeft by the work. Your lofs of flesh is nothing, if it be made up with spirit. ther, I mean myself. race, Non omnis moriar; dy spent. God help him who hath neibelieve I fhall fay with Hofor half my body is alrea LETTER CXXXVIII. Dr. SWIFT to Mr. POPE. Dear SIR, Dublin, April 28. 1739. THE HE gentleman who will have the honour to deliver you this, although he be one related to me, |