The Rivals. Act II, Scene 1. Acres. What's the matter with the gentleman? Abs. He is only expressing his great satisfaction at hearing that Julia has been so well and happy — that's all- hey, Faulkland? 5 Faulk. Oh! I am rejoiced to hear it has a happy disposition! yes, yes, she Acres. That she has indeed. Then she is so accomplished So sweet a voice so expert at her harpsichord such a mistress of flat and sharp, squallante, 10 rumblante, and quiverante! There was this time month - odds minims and crochets! how she did chirrup at Mrs. Piano's concert! Faulk. There again, what say you to this? You see she has been all mirth and song-not a thought 15 of me! Abs. Pho! man, is not music the food of love? Abs. Stay, now, they were some pretty melancholy purling-stream airs, I warrant; perhaps you may recollect; did she sing, When absent from my soul's delight? Acres. No, that wa'n't it. 25 Abs. Or, Go, gentle gales! [Sings. Acres. Oh, no! nothing like it. Odds! now I recollect one of them My heart's my own, my will is free. [Sings. Faulk. Fool! fool that I am! to fix all my happiness on such a trifler! 'Sdeath! to make herself the pipe and 30 balladmonger of a circle! to soothe her light heart with catches and glees! What can you say to this, sir? Abs. Why, that I should be glad to hear my mistress had been so merry, sir. she Faulk. Nay, nay, nay - I'm not sorry that she has been happy no, no, I am glad of that I would not have her sad or sick - yet surely a sympathetic heart 5 would have shown itself even in the choice of a song might have been temperately healthy, and somehow, plaintively gay; - but she has been dancing too, I doubt not! Acres. What does the gentleman say about dancing? 10 Abs. He says the lady we speak of dances as well as she sings. Faulk. There! there was at our last race there I told you so! I told you 15 so! Oh! she thrives in my absence! - Dancing! but her whole feelings have been in opposition with mine; I have been anxious, silent, pensive, sedentary — my days have been hours of care, my nights of watchfulness. has been all health! spirit! laugh! song! dance! She Abs. For Heaven's sake, Faulkland, don't expose yourself so! Suppose she has danced, what then? - does not the ceremony of society often oblige 20 Faulk. Well, well, I'll contain myself - perhaps as you say for form's sake. - What, Mr. Acres, you were 25 praising Miss Melville's manner of dancing a minuet hey? but what I was Acres. Oh, I dare insure her for that going to speak of was her country-dancing. Odds swimmings! she has such an air with her! Faulk. Now disappointment on her!- Defend this, 30 Absolute; why don't you defend this? - Country-dances! jigs and reels! am I to blame now? A minuet I could have forgiven I should not have minded that I say I should not have regarded a minuet-but country5 dances! - Zounds! had she made one in a cotillon - I believe I could have forgiven even that — but to be monkey-led for a night! to run the gauntlet through a string of amorous palming puppies! - to show paces like a managed filly!— Oh, Jack, there never can be but one IO man in the world whom a truly modest and delicate woman ought to pair with in a country-dance; and, even then, the rest of the couples should be her great-uncles and aunts! Abs. Ay, to be sure! -grandfathers and grandmothers! 15 Faulk. If there be but one vicious mind in the set, 'twill spread like a contagion — the action of their pulse beats to the lascivious movement of the jig — their quivering, warm-breathed sighs impregnate the very air — the atmosphere becomes electrical to love, and each amor20 ous spark darts through every link of the chain! I must leave you I own I am somewhat flurried and that confounded looby has perceived it. [Going. Abs. Nay, but stay, Faulkland, and thank Mr. Acres for his good news. [Exit. Abs. Ha! ha! ha! poor Faulkland five minutes since "nothing on earth could give him a moment's uneasiness!" Acres. The gentleman wa'n't angry at my praising 30 his mistress, was he? Abs. A little jealous, I believe, Bob. |