APPENDIX, No. V. EXTRACTS FROM MRS. RAMSAY'S DIARY. Saturday, July, 16th, 1791. My feet had well nigh slipped, through the prevalence of my easily besetting sin; nevertheless, I laid me down to sleep, rejoicing that I had not utterly fallen. Lord, make me at all times watchful. 17th. Lord, may this be a sanctified Sabbath; a day to be remembered for holy resolutions and enabling grace. I am weak-O! when shall the time of full strength come. In all the great trials and lesser vexations of life, may patience have its perfect work, till I lie down where the wicked cease from troubling, and the weary are at rest. 19th. I thank God, for the ease and cheerfulness of this day; and that in spite of secret griefs, and spiritual conflicts, my soul and body do both sweetly repose themselves in the God of my salvation. 20th. O day, blackened with sin, and spotted by transgression !-How long, O Lord! how long-when shall I advance in the spiritual life, and not thus wound my peace, and disgrace my profession? I thank God, that my heart aches. O let it never be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin. Oh, my God! how lately hath thine afflictive Providence been wringing my heart, with a twofold anguish: the loss of my sweet baby, and the consideration of those sins, which required this chastisement-and yet, how prone am I to return to folly. Oh! for the grace of true repentance, and of unfeigned resignation. 27th. The two last days have been days of mournful walking. Oh! how does the remembrance of my sweet Fanny press upon my memory; and how good is God, that though cast down, yet my heart is kept from murmuring, and aches more for my sorrow causing sins, than for the sorrow itself: thanks be to Christ, who has purchased a heaven for us, where we shall be without sin, and of course without sorrow. 28th. Lord, make me ashamed of my sins, and give me a holy fortitude to resist; and let me be making continual war against them, till grace shall conquer, and death set me beyond their reach. 29th. Oh power of sin, how great art thou! Lord, give me strength. 30th. My heart is ready to break under a sense of sin, and to cry out, I shall one day fall by the hands of these mine enemies. Oh thou great deliverer, Death! how pleasant is the thought, that thou wilt free from me this body of corruption. Hold thou me up, O, Lord! that all the days of my appointed time I may walk very humbly and mournfully, under a sense of mine iniquities. Cleanse thou me from secret faults, and let no open, or presumptuous sin, get the better of me. Lord, I am weak-strengthen me; I am bowed down under thy chastisementyet so much lighter is it than my guilt, that I am filled with wonder at thy compassions and long suffering. 31st. Prepare me, O God, for the unknown events of this day; and at all times keep me humble and fearful. August 4th. Oh! easily besetting sin; when shall the time come, that thy power will be broken, and my poor soul find rest. soul find rest. Lord, make me diligent in self-examination, and let not any sin have dominion over me. 5th. In six, and in seven troubles, I have found thee, O Lord, my help !-Forsake me not now, O my God! I am most unworthy, Lord, even to look up unto thee-yet, to whom, Lord, should I go, but unto thee, who hast words of Eternal Life, and the keys of universal Providence. Unto thee, commit I my ways; and on thee, as from whom alone can come help, do I cast my cares. days: Lord, deliver me from sin, especially from those which so easily beset, and so often oppress me. My soul longs for deliverance and rest. Holy Spirit of sanctification, dwell and rule in me, and deliver me from this horrible subjection. 10th. Mr. Hollinshead baptized Mr. E. Ramsay's little boy, naming him David. May. God bless the infant, and make it indeed a child of grace. 12th. Here I still remain a monument of for bearing mercy. Oh infinite compassion! that I should be out of hell! Oh, Lord! the pressure of my sins is indeed very great. Oh! for thy mercy's sake, deliver me. I am weary of my life, because of my daily sins; and whereas, I ought to have made progress. Despair is sometimes ready to overcome me, through the power of sin. Lord, help me, enable me to endure to the end. Lord, abandon me not, for I grow weaker and weaker. 15th and 16th. Truly, the pressure of guilt is upon me, and I feel astonished that my bed has not this night been made in hell. O wretched me! when shall I be delivered from the body of this death, and from the power of this sin. Oh! how it cleaves to me, how it besets me, how it' conquers me, and then leaves me almost in the depths of despair. Lord, I soul is sore pained within me. tremble, and my Surely these re peated rebellions are forfeiting all thy mercies, and I need dread, lest all sorts of bereavements happen to me-I need be in horror, lest the worst of bereavements happen to me, even that I be bereaved of the light of God's countenance, and damnation be my portion. Oh! vilest and most complicated of sinners that I am! Terror and dismay take hold upon me. O! if men knew me as I am known to my God, I should be trampled under foot-the church would disown me-the greatest sinners would abominate me— my husband, that loves and thinks well of me, would wonder at me, and mourn, and I should be hated of all men.* Lord, have mercy upon * These self-abasements and condemnations, may appear to some to be extravagant. To this it is replied, that they are warranted by the descriptions of human depravity, given in holy writ. "And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually."-Genesis vi. 5. "The heart of man is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked. Who can know it?"-Jeremiah xvii. 9. St. Paul calls himself "the chief of sinners,"-2 Timothy i. 15. It is also to be observed, that they who do not practise self-examination, are unacquainted with the workings of their own minds, and strangers to heart religion, are not competent judges. It is with holiness as with knowledge. He who knows most, is most sensible of the defects of his knowledge.--They who have attained the highest eminence in religion, are most deeply impressed with a sense of their own unworthiness. As every exercised christian knows more of the sinfulness of his own heart, than. he possibly can of the heart of another, the practical result is, that every |