able agitation, and seldom, if ever, without a great degree of awe and of dread. For, although, through the grace of God which was given unto me, I was generally able to entertain a humble and sometimes a lively hope that it would be a great release, and would introduce me into a higher and nobler state of being, which I now find to be the case, yet the change itself appeared so awful and perplexing, and the event by which it was to be brought to pass so painful and distressing, that I could seldom, if ever, reflect upon it without many emotions of terror and alarm. I thought of the pains, the groans, the dying strife, with which it would be attended. thought of the struggles and convulsions of dissolving nature. I thought of the breaking of the heart-strings. I thought of the last pantings of my earthly existence. I thought of the sighs, and sobs, and tears with which it would all be witnessed by affectionate and beloved friends. And when I thought of these things it was more than I could bear. I trembled at the thoughts of dying: I regarded death as an enemy, and, if God had willed,


would thankfully have avoided a conflict with it altogether. For much as I had groaned beneath the pressure of mortality, with the apostle I could not but exclaim, "Not for that I would be unclothed, but clothed upon, that mortality might be swallowed up of life." But the conflict was inevitable: death had passed upon all men, for that all had sinned; and the time at length arrived when, like those of my species who had gone before me, I was compelled to meet it. A mortal sickness seized upon the nature to which I was allied. At first I hoped that it would recover from its effects and be again restored to health; but, oh in a little while such hopes as these vanished even from my own mind. I felt the sentence of death within it, and was fully convinced that it was about to die. The terror with which, at a distance, I had so frequently contemplated the coming of this event was now removed. Sickness had, in a very great degree, reconciled my earthly nature to her approaching destiny, and that God, who knew my own weakness and infirmity, kindly raised me above every distressing and alarming fear

as to the issue of the change at hand. Nay, at times I was able to rejoice in hope of the glory of God, to welcome the approach of death, and to exult in the blissful prospect then before me. Still, however, there was much in the act of dying that was fearfully distressing. Oh! it seemed like the rending of myself asunder, and many of the struggles of my mortal nature were dreadfully severe. For nature, reluctant as she ever is to give up the animal existence which she possesses, struggled hard against it. But she struggled in vain. Her efforts to retain it grew weaker and weaker. And, as she was gradually yielding to the invisible power against her, I could not but be conscious of many emotions that were strange and fearful. While in the midst of health and vigour I had often tried to imagine what would be my feelings at that mysterious hour; but what I did experience in passing to this great transition was altogether different to any thing of which I had before conceived, and was indescribable; so that, perplexed with the strangeness of the

feeling then upon me, I could not but ask


"What is this absorbs me quite,

Steals my senses, shuts my sight,
Drowns my spirit, draws my breath?—

Tell me, my soul, can this be death?"

Oh! it was death-I was then within but a very few hours of the termination of my earthly being. As those hours were lingering away, the awful sensation came upon me more and more. It had now seized upon the extremities of my body. My feet were cold in death. My powers of utterance were almost gone. My sight had nearly failed me, and I could scarcely hear the tender accents pouring in my ear, intended as they were to impart consolation and to smooth my dying pillow. At length I reached that crisis in my being-it was an awful moment : never shall I forget it-when but one sigh and struggle more would alter the character of it altogether. The sigh was breathed, the struggle was made; when, in a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, I entered upon this mighty change, and ere the weeping friends, so assiduously watch

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ing that mortal hour, could whisper to each other, He is gone!' I felt myself a naked, shivering, disembodied spirit; and, ere I could startle at what I was, I was most strangely clothed upon with another body, even with my house, which is from heaven.* And now that my first emotions of awe and wonder at the vastness of the change through which I have gone, have, in some degree, passed away, I cannot but rejoice and bless my God for the deliverance which I have obtained; for, oh! I have now dropped the body of death for ever, and have entered upon the path of life. A blissful immortality is now before me. I am now equal unto the angels of God, and shall die no more. Transporting thought! But a little while ago my prospects of ethereal bliss, brightly as they might arise before the vision of my faith, were always overshadowed when I thought of the dark and frightful valley through which I must pass before they could be at all realized by me; but now there is no dark or frightful valley between me and immortal happiness.

* 2 Cor. v. 1.-See Note f.

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