4

THE following treatife of Directions to Servants was begun fome years ago by the author, • who had not leisure to finish and put it into proper order, being engaged in many other works of greater ufe to his country, as may be feen by moft of his writings. But, as the author's defign

"I have a thing in profe, begun above twenty-eight years ago, " and almoft finished. It will make a four-fhilling volume; and is "fuch a perfection of folly, that you fhall never hear of it till it is "printed, and then you shall be left to guefs. Nay, I have another

of the fame age, which will require a long time to perfect, and is "worse than the former, in which I will ferve you the fame way." Swift's Letters, in vol. 1o. let, 62, alluding to Polite Converfation, and Directions to fervants.

⚫ was

was to expofe the villanies and frauds of fervants to their masters and mistreffes, we fhall make no apology for its publication, but give it our readers in the fame manner as we find it in the origi⚫nal, which may be feen in the printer's cuftody. The few tautologies that occur in the characters 'left unfinished, will make the reader look upon 'the whole as a rough draught, with feveral outlines only drawn. However, that there may ap pear no daubing or patchwork by other hands, it is thought most adviseable to give it in the au'thor's own words.

It is imagined that he intended to make a large • volume of this work; but, as time and health 'would not permit him, the reader may draw, 'from what is here exhibited, means to detect the many vices and faults which people in that kind of low life are fubject to.

'If gentlemen would seriously confider this work, which is written for their inftruction, (although ironically), it would make them better oecono mifts, and preferve their eftates and families from. ruin.

It may be seen by fome scattered papers, (wherein were given hints for a dedication and preface, and a lift of all degrees of fervants), that the ' author intended to have gone through all their 'characters.

This is all that need be faid as to this treatise, ' which can only be looked upon as a fragment.'

Dublin Nov. 8.

1745.

G. F.

DIREC

W

HEN your mafter or lady calls a fervant by name, if that fervant be not in the way, none of you are to anfwer; for then there will be no end of your drudgery: and masters themselves allow, that if a servant comes when he is called, it is fufficient.

When

This tract is imperfect and unfinished. The editor tells us, that a preface and dedication were to have been added to it. I think it was not publifhed till after the Dean's death; but I remember the manufcript handed about, and much applauded in his lifetime. To fay the most that can be offered in its favour, the tract is written in fo facetious a kind of low humour, that it must please many readers ;nor is it without fome degree of merit, by pointing out with an amazing exactnefs (and what in a lefs trivial cafe must have been called judgement) the faults, blunders, tricks, lies, and various knaveriesof domestic fervants. How much time must have been employed in putting together fuch a work? What an intenfenefs of thought mult have been bestowed upon the lowest and most flavish feenes of life? It is one of those compofitions, that the utmost strength of wit can fcarce fuftain from finking. A man of Swift's exalted genius ought conftantly to have foared into higher regions. He ought to have looked upon perfons of inferior abilities, as children whom Nature had appointed him to inftruct, encourage, and improve. Superior talents feem to have been intended by Providence as public benefits; and the person who poffcffes fuch blefings, is certainly answerable to Heaven for thofe endowments which he enjoys above the rest of mankind. Let him jeft with dignity, and let him be ironical upon ufeful fubjects; leaving poor flaves to heat their porridge, or drink their fmall beer, in fuch veffels as they fhall find proper. it feems, had not this way of thinking; and having long indulged his paflions, at laft perhaps miftook them for his duty. The m.ftake is neither extraordinary nor furprifing. In points of religion it has carried men into great extravaganc.es; in thofe of morality, into no lefs: but in politics, into the greatest of all. Our inclinations are fo

The Dean

apt

When you have done a fault, be always pert and infolent, and behave yourfelf as if you were the injured perfon. This will immediately put your master or lady off their mettle.

If

apt to hurry us into inconfiderate actions, that we are afterwards inclined to flatter ourselves they are right, only because they have proceeded from our own thoughts and directions. Thus Swift, when he had once established the rule of Vive la bagatelle, was refolved to pursue it at all hazards. I wish his thoughts had taken another turn. The lower claffes of mankind pass on unnoticed, the great only are cenfured. They ought to be particularly attentive to every ftep they take. The Dean of St. Patrick's fhould have known himself as "rex idem hominum Phæbique facerdos;" and should have remembred, that kings and priefts are extremely liable to be cenfured. Poor Swift! why did he fink below himself before he was deprived of reafon? Forgive him that error, and draw a veil of oblivion over certain excrefcencies of wit and humour, you will then admire him, as an honour to the public, and a fcourge to all the knaves and fools of his time.-Several of Swift's pofthumous pieces are neither worthy of his pen, nor of the reader's perufal. Many of them are fpurious, and many more are trifling, and in every refpect improper for the public view: fo that what was once ludicrously faid upon a different occafion, may be applied to feveral of Swift's writings, as "they put us in mind of the famous machine in Winftanlay's water-works, where out of the "lame veffel, the fpectators were prefented with tea, coffee, cho"colate, champagne, and four fmall beer." Orrery.

For fuch misapplication of his talents, Swift fell under his friend Pope's correction: as appears from these lines:

"If, after all, we muft with Wilmot own, "The cordial drop of life is love alone,

"And Swift cry wifely, Vive la bagatelle !

"The man that loves and laughs, muft fure do well.

Pope could not bear to fee a friend he fo much valued, live in the miferable abufe of one of Nature's best gifs, unadmonished of his folly. Swift (as we may fee by fome of his pofthumous pieces, fo dishonour. able and injurious to his memory) trified away his old age in a diffipation that women and boys might be afhamed of. For when men have given into a long habit of employing their wit only to shew their parts to edge their spleen, to pander to a faction, or, in fhort, to any thing but that for which Nature beftowed it, namely, to recommend and fet off truth; old age, which abates the paffions, will never rectify the abufes they occafioned; Lu: the remains of wit, inttead of feeking and recovering their proper channel, will run into that miferable depravity of taite here condemned; and in which Dr. Swift feems to have placed no inconfiderable part of his wifdom, "I chufe," fays

he

If you fee your mafter wronged by any of your fellow-fervants, be fure to conceal it, for fear of being called a tell-tale. However, there is one exception, in cafe of a favourite fervant, who is juftly hated by the whole family; who therefore are bound in prudence to lay all the faults they can upon the favourite.

The cook, the butler, the groom, the marketman, and every other fervant who is concerned in the expences of the family, fhould act as if his mafter's whole eftate ought to be applied to that fervant's particular bufinefs. For inftance, if the cook computes his master's estate to be a thoufand pounds a-year, he reasonably concludes, that a thousand pounds a-year will afford meat enough, and therefore he need not be fparing; the butler makes the fame judgement; fo may the groom and the coachman; and thus every branch of expence will be filled to your master's honour.

When you are chid before company, (which, with fubmiffion to our mafters and ladies, is an unmannerly practice), it often happens that fome ftranger will have the good nature to drop a word in your excufe: in such a cafe you will have a good title to justify yourself, and may rightly conclude, that whenever he chides you afterwards on other occafions, he may be in the wrong; in which opinion you will be the better confirmed, by stating the cafe to your fellow-fervants in your own way, who will certainly decide in your favour: therefore, as I have faid before, whenever you are chidden, complain as if you were injured.

he, in a letter to Mr. Pope, " my companions amongst thofe of leaft "conf.quence, and most compliance; I read the most trifling books "I can find; and whenever I write, it is upon the most trifling fub"" jects." And again, in a letter to Lord Bolingbroke, "I love la ' bagatelle better than ever. I am always writing bad profe, or worse "verfes, either of rage or raillery," &c. And again, in a letter to Mr. Gay, "My rule is, Vive la bagatelle," Warburton.