He raged like a bear, fore and aft, through the ship,
Till over the cable his hap was to trip,
And his ballast being much over-light for his sail,
Right over the bow in the ocean he fell,
Derry down, &c.

Now Rubro had got, as you may well suppose,
By drinking of brandy a very fine nose-
A nose such as rarely is seen between eyes,
A nose that resembled a trumpet in size.
Derry down, &c.

This nose being red, it so shone in the dark,
That it quickly attracted the eyes of a shark;
And the shark, being pretty well up to his trade,
To make sure of the nose, he bit off the whole head
Derry down, &c.

with 7 heads and 7 erowns; and the beast with 7 heads; 7 angels bearing 7 plagues, and 7 vials of wrath. The vision of Daniel was of 70 weeks; and the elders of Israel were 70. There are also 7 heavens, 7 planets, (query?) 7 stars, 7 wise men, 7. champions of Christendom, 7 notes in music, 7 primary colours, 7 deadly sins, and 7 sacraments in the catholic church. The 7th son was considered as endowed with preeminent wisdom; and the 7th son of a 7th son, is still thought to possess the power of healing diseases spontaneously. Perfection is likened to gold 7 times purified in the fire; and we yet say you frightened me out of my 7 senses. The opposite sides of the dice make 7, whence the players at hazard make 7 the main. Hippocrates says, that the septenary number, by its occult virtues, tends to the accomplishment of all things, to be the dispenser of life, and fountain of all its changes: and, like Shakspeare, he divides the life of man into 7 ages; for as the moon changes her phases every 7 days, this number influences all sublunary beings. The teeth spring out on the 7th month, and are shed" May your fate be a warning to low and to high, and renewed in the 7th year, when infancy is changed Ne'er to guzzle too much when a neighbour is dry! into childhood; at twice 7 years puberty begins; at May it teach them how leaky is life's fickle bark, three times 7 the faculties are developed, and man- How slippery the decks, and that Death is a shark." hood commences, and we are become legally comDerry down, &c. petent to all civil acts; at four times seven man is in full possession of his strength; at five times 7 he is fit for the business of the world; at six times 7 he becomes grave and wise, or never; at 7 times 7 he is in his apogee, and from that time decays; at eight

times 7 he is in his first climacteric; at nine times 7, or 63, he is in his last or grand climacteric, or year of danger; and ten times 7, or three score years and ten, has, by the royal prophet, been pronounced the natural period of human life.

RUBRO, OR THE DRUNKEN CAPTAIN.

As the Caroline frigate was just setting sail,
Before a fine breeze, from the port of Kinsale,
As bold as a beggar, as drunk as a lord,
Old Rubro, the captain, came stagg'ring on board,
Derry down, down, hey derry, &c.

Just then father Neptune emerged from the sea,
And, eyeing the body, thus gravely said he:
Ah, Rubro! you've met with the punishment d
For you drank all the grog and gave none to the crew.
Derry down, &c.

CODE FOR THE BETTER REGULATION OF DUELS

As the fashion for duelling increases, we see bea windows, and there is a work published in Irelan tiful duelling pistols ticketed up in the pawnbroke

Ba

called "General Instructions for all Seconds
Homp-h who was extremely fond of duelling, (ta
Duels, by a late Captain in the Army."
ing a superabundance of honour to satisfy,) delite
rately stripped himself to the skin, lest the wadding
should enter, and, putting on his spectacles, general
brought his man down. By practising at an e
or snuffing out a candle at twelve paces, or any
these more ingenious methods of repairing honour
the certainty of making a gash in your adversary
body, you may trace up all the probable and poss
causes how soon a person of honour may be affronted

so as to get his name up; for it appears that there | court. All tradesmen and mechanics should be alis some éclat to be obtained in it in this age. lowed to fight secundum artem, or professionally, on There has been a benevolent practice, occasionally paying their fees, which may be regulated by the resorted to by considerate and confederated seconds, lord mayor and corporation of the city of London, of substituting cork-bullets, exactly painted like lead, in cooperation with the chancellor; for a merchant, instead of the more deadly metal. Again, the friendly so much; a banker, a bookseller, a baker, in due interference of a pair of Bow-street officers, in the proportions: with authors it is difficult to determine exact nick of time, has warded off, most probably, a how to act; for though their battles (and the fra pair of odious bullets. The parties become cool, the ternity are for ever fighting, like scorpions and spi seconds interfere, and the magistrates hand the welders) are full of gall, being generally waged in liquid come bond to the furious combatants to keep the ink, yet having, of late, measured the field of honour, peace. If neither cork-bullets nor paper-pellets can in ambition of their betters, or the Desœuvres-the be obtained, nor the presence of peace officers, then nothing-to-do gentlemen, what measure of money to an apology may come hobbling up to close the scene, prescribe for an author's license is rather difficult. which, by a masterly casuistry in the wording, leaves Their poverty and their pride are well known: still the original honour of both parties in statu quo. It the gareteer, who wages perpetual war in pamphlets would be unfair to deprive officers of the army, who and periodicals, should be allowed full credentials, must, it appears, wash out affronts given them in if the money is even advanced by the literary fund. their adversary's blood, of so great a luxury: still we might venture to propose, that the chancellor of the exchequer, for the time being, should be empowered to expressly permit, nay, to encourage, meetings at Chalk Farm, by allowing duellists to fight, upon a stamped certificate being duly had and obtained, with a stamp of 5001. affixed thereupon, or the small sum of 2507. for any printed apology, being first duly stamped and registered as aforesaid. Then, if the parties dared, after this proclamation, to smuggle a duel, not having paid the fees, to be deemed guilty of murder, and hung upon the top of Primrose Hill, for the benefit of the rooks and crows. Doctors and attornies, the former being privileged to kill, and the latter to take away, may, as they too are innovating upon the field of honour, be put upon a par with the military. In fact, getting their money so much easier, they perhaps ought to pay more to the state. Should the clergy ever dare to fight the flesh in this manner, which to their honour is rarely the case, then their tenths should be commuted into twentieths, and they compelled to read the funeral service over each departed duellist, and the offices for those sick who have been winged; express forms for_which should be composed by the ecclesiastical

The law of honour is above all other laws, else why
do barristers not only have verbal battles, but pistol
rencontres; and even our senators, the makers of
laws, become the breakers of laws in this respect.
A prudential avoiding a causeless quarrel, is called
cowardice; and to take an affront, baseness and
meanness of spirit: to refuse fighting, and putting
life on the chance of a bullet, a practice forbid by
the law of God and all good governments, is still
called cowardice; and a man is bound to die duelling,
or live and be laughed at. This trumping up of
imaginary things, called bravery and gallantry,
naming them virtue and honour, is beyond what we
know of the jocose, seeing that such inconsistences,
and such absurdities as the following reasoning, are
made to go down with mankind; for example, A. is
found in bed with B.'s wife; B. is the person injured,
and therefore offended, and coming into the cham-
ber with his pistol or sword in hand, A. loudly ex-
claims, Why, sir, you wont murder me, will you?
As you are a man of honour, let me rise, and meet
you." B. therefore, being put in mind that he is a
man of honour, starts back, and must act an honour-
able part; so he lets A. get up, put on his clothes,
take his sword or pistols; then they fight, and B. is

killed for his honour; whereas, had the laws of God, | Lips of the reddest cherry's hue,
of nature, and of reason, taken place, the adulterer
and adulteress should have been taken prisoners, and
carried before the judge, and should have been im-
mediately sentenced, he to the block, and she to the
stake; and the innocent-abused husband had no
reason to have run any risk of his life for being cor-
nuted. Defoe, who writes thus, goes on to say, that
the aggrieved person, to be put on a par, might say,
in order to render such reasoning on the law of
honour consistent, "No, sir! say I, let me lay with
your wife too, and then, if you desire it, I will fight
you; then I am upon even terms with you."

LIGHT PUN.

Two gentlemen passing by some new houses, one of them observed that there were too few windows; but that circumstance, as it saved in part the tax, would be good for the liver. True," says the other, | but dd bad for the lights."

THE GAME OF LIFE.

Sterne says, the enjoyment of life is a tranquil acquiescence under an agreeable delusion, whence it has been said to be a jest, ut it is not so. He further says, that every animal in the creation as it grows older grows graver, except an old woman, and she grows frisky.-It has been somewhere observed, that when an old man has one foot in the grave, an old woman has a foot in the stars. Life has been

compared to the running of tea, though the first and last decoction be equally weak, the one gives the flavour of the herb, the other but its forces. Lord Chesterfield says, a man has but a bad bargain of it at the best; and the most natural conclusion is that it is the shadow of a shade.-To conclude: a man must laugh before he dies, or he must go out of the world without laughing !!!

And laughing eyes of sparkling blue;
The trimmest leg that e'er was seen,
The lightest foot that trips the green;
Two fair white globes heave on thy breast,
And Oh, come clasp me!" cries the waist.
Beauty, thy form, from toe to top,
Would tempt St. Peter's heir, the Pope.
Beauty, thou art a baited hook,
And man the tenant of the brook,
Who, wanting caution, swallows all he meets,
Till oft both bait and barbed hook he eats.
Thou art a leg of sheep, both fair and fat,
Placed in the view of man, a hungry glutton;
Thou art the very thing he would be at—
How his mouth waters to enjoy the mution!
Thou art a magnet, man is steel,

Go where thou wilt, that follows at thy heel;
Aye, should'st thou lead the way to Nick,
Close and more close to thee he'll stick.
Beauty, to me what art thou not?
My balm of life, my light of day-
Come, dearest maid! then, to my cot,
And chase the fiend, Disease, away.

PARIS IS THE ONLY PLACE.

Where shall we go to enjoy ourselves this summ

dear?

Shall we simplify it, and sentimental be
Among the lakes and mountains in Cumberland o

Westmoreland ?

Or shall we Byronize it upon the sea?
To Brighton and to Hastings the citizens are hurrying
To Margate and to Ramsgate the 'prentices a

Cheltenham and Leamington, folks insides out at
speed;
worrying,

While Bath is full of tabbies, and is very dull ir
deed.

Spoken.] "Lady Bab, I've uncommon good idea." "6 "What is it?" "To spend the summer months at Birmingham." "What do you think of Harrowgate?" "O, shocking! Last season I was almost

elbowed out of the room by sir Jeremy Treacle and you was made a knight of." "Good morning, lady his fat wife." "Cheltenham ?" "Worse; its al-Shortdip." "I take this here wisit wery kind of you, ways full, and nobody there." Brighton?" "Oh, wery kind indeed; and how is sir Christopher, now horrid! I decidedly object to Brighton; you might he is one of us nobility?" "He's very well, thankee, almost as well be at Bagnigge-wells on a Sunday." but he don't go out to-day; this is melting day, and "Aye, I recollect when I was a young man, Brighton the knight's up to his elbows in tallow." "Indeed, used to be about seventy miles from town; but now, then all the lights he makes now will be night lights, what with the plaguy short cuts and modern improve- I suppose." What do you think of Margate, lady ments, it is not above fifty-four." "Well, then, sup- Shortdip?" "Now, what's the use of teazing about pose we all go to Paris?" "Pray, sir Larry, can you our family affairs." "Why, I was going to Hastings, tell me how far it is from the coast to the capital?" but I understand your friend, Mrs. Maggotts, the "No, upon my conscience, that I cannot; you might cheesemonger, is there." "My friend! she's no as well ask me how far it is from the capital to the friend of mine; we do condescend to sarve them with coast." "O! you creature, you know you can, you grocery, but we don't wisit, I can assure yon. No, have been there, you know." Yes, madam, that we don't wisit, nor ever mean to wisit. No! no! was before the revolution, and I am told that things her husband's a rank demagog; and now I am a man are plaguily altered since." But you can't speak of title, of course I am an aristogog." "The duchess the language." "O, leave me alone for that. I of Trumps is at the Isle of White." "Indeed; then have two bows to my string: I'll try them with she is the only one of us that is there, for we are gone "You had better try them with Spanish; to Paris." "What's the use of going to Paris, spendthat all ranks comprehend." Well, then, Paris being a mint of money? besides, we don't understand their lingo." "But we can have Dick home from school to interpret for us." Aye, but what's to be seen there, but what we can see in London, eh?”” duchess of Angoulemme, and the goblins and guillo-Why, there's the king and mounseer, and the tine, and grapes for a penny a pound, and Champagne instead of small beer." "Indeed, is there, byjingo? why then,

Irish."

at."

་་

Ya hip! for France, there, for Paris is the only place
For fashion, bagatelle, esprit, for elegance and grace.
Where shall we go to enjoy ourselves this summer,

love?

The mayor and court of aldermen will tour it at
Broadstairs;

Hornsey or Richmond we're surely now a cut above,
Aud Putney's grown so vulgar, that 'tis only fit
for bears.

We must go on the salt sea, and mingle with the

Parlez voos,

And get the Parish polish and the true French cut; Now do, my dear sir Jeremy, consent, you surely

can't refuse,

For I am sick and tired quite of stewing in the shop;

For who can think of Margate, why 'twould make We'll go up to Highgate, wife, and ramble through

one quite a butt.

Spoken.] "Margate, indeed: I wonder you have not more regard for one's quality, than mixing and | associating with the Sparrowgrasses and such low people." "Why, my lady, you used to be very foud of Margate." "Yes, sir Jeremy, that was before

the tunnel, dear,

And get some tea at Hampstead, or at Mother Bed
Cap's stop.

Highgate—not a bit of it—No, that I do purtest,,mry
love,

There's nothing in one's own country that's worthy being seen;