Pagina-afbeeldingen
PDF
ePub
[ocr errors]

both mentally and bodily, and, as we is the benevolent gentleman, who mutters (Zachary Gobbletop) are not unfrequently every sixth word out loud for the especial abstracted during the computation, we have benefit of all in his neighbourhood, sustainbeen productive of no little amusement. ing the interest of the intervals by a subUpon one occasion we were absorbed in dued hum ; precisely in the manner Richone of these abstruse arithmetical problems, ard III would have repeated his soliloquy, and endeavouring to make an estimate in had it been introduced as a stage-epistle, round numbers of the food devoured during thus: a single week, taking into account so many

"Now, h m-m-m-m-winter b-m-m-m-m-m-m-dishouses in so many streets in the various content ; parishes of the metropolis. Sixty-four, H-10-m-m-glorious h-m-m-m son of York;

H-m-m-m-house h-m-m-m lie carry two, and add up the next column

H-m-m-m-bosoms b-m-m-m ocean buried !' a death-like silence pervaded the coffeeroom, saving the faint singing in the gas Then there is the diminutive man, who pipes, and the occasional rustle of a maga- invariably peruses a paper when spread zine. Our task was just reaching the forth in all its gigantic dimensions, graspiug sum total'— the girl stood by, waiting for the edges as vigorously as his short but our order. “Five thousand six hundred outstretched arms will permit, until you and fifty cups of coffee, three thousand nine begin to fancy that he is holding on for hundred and seventy-two rounds of but- dear life by the margin, instead of placidly tered toast !' we exclaimed in a voice of glancing over the news. Then there is the triumph. A look of astonishment from pale gentleman, who cannot understand everybody present awoke us from our fit three consecutive sentences from the incesof abstraction; the handmaid staggered sant chuckling in the next box, and, having against the umbrella stand with surprise, a very discursive mind, is uncertain after and hurried into the back parlour, of studying a wretched paragraph of some course, with the intelligence that there was twenty-five lines for the last half-hour, a fat lunatic in number seven, with a plush whether it is a description of some novel waistcoat and such an appetite! How dance, or an execution, a wild beast hunt ever, - be it known unto all to whom these among the Carib savages, or a royal battue. presents may come' that our principal This individual always reminds one of what recreation in a coffee-house—that is the the waggish old butler in Richmond-buildprincipal recreation of us, the imperial ings called the pursuit of letters under Gubbletop-is in studying the different difficulties,' when he ran along, on half-acharacteristics of its frequenters. First dozen soft corns, after the postman down at and foremost is the podgy old gentleman the end of the next terrace. In sooth, yonder, his spectacles resting on his upper many of the customers are so eccentric in lip, and firing his eyesight straight down their dispositions, that their habits would the bridge of his nose, as another would aim remind one of coffee-houses themselves, along bis Manton, bringing down the 'fol- since there you constantly see lies as they fly. Then there is the funny their cups.' Zachary Gobbletop haunteth gentleman, always dropping on facetious these domains as their good genius, he perthings, beating his forehead in wild, but vadeth all the coffee houses in London, silent, bursts of hilarity, and waving off like Ubiquity in quest of muffins.” the attendant with her supply of crumpets, as though he said: Hist! for Heaven's sake-another minute ! until he arrives

The Eatherer, at the termination of his joke, and resigns the paper with twinkling eyes to attack Singular Coincidences.—The words writthe provisions. Then there is the monopo- ten in italics in this paragraph are the list in the adjoining box, who sits upon names of persons who are all residing in several unread publications, hatching their the town of Dorchester, which can Bragge contents in a tremour, lest somebody else of its Duke, Bishops, and Squires; for each should have their prior enjoyment. Then of the Parsons a Clark is to be found, althere is the blunt, matter-of-fact fellow, with though they must be content with a Chup, L. S. D. glimmering in every button, and ple. Builders will find lots of Wood and altogether a very impersonation of his Stone, but to describe any wood in partihousehold god, as he himself styles it- cular, save Ash and Nutt, is difficult, our blunt.' He is remarkable for deeming Groves not producing any other; yet as it an absolute matter of conscience to get Painters can cover all imperfections, they the entire value of his halfpence, and, con have choice of colours in Green, Brown, sequently, reads everything in a newspaper, Grey, Olive, and white; tradesmen are railway advertisements and all, from the plenty, for there are T'aylors, Millers, Banumber up in the left hand corner, to the kers, Coopers, Masons, Cutlers, a Joiner • printed and published' at the bottom of and Lock Smiths; and for the agriculturist, the last column inclusively. Then there there is a Plowman and a Carter. The

6

spoons in

6

man.

Lakes of Dorchester do not produce any and the young women dirty, slip-shod slatangling for the Fisher ; being all so shal. terns. Talk about bright eyed Italian low they may be crossed by the Ford in a maids indeed.'”Headley. Patten without a Barge or Bridge. The Dr. Herschel's Books.—The library of sportsman need not Fear of finding any the late chief rabbi, Dr. Herschel - conDay in the Winter or other time a little sisting of upwards of 4000 Hebrew volumes, amusement by looking after the Birds, or and including, it is said, many rare books getting a pop at the Martin, the Dawe, or and manuscripts brought together by the the Drake; but should he prefer a hunt high priest himself, his father, and grandafter a Fox, or a Hart, he could be sup- father-has been purchased for the Hebrew plied with some Poynters and a Talbot. College, at the very low price of 300l. Garlands are plenty, though flowers are

The Imaum of Muskat. - His highness scarce ; and in trying to Cull the Rose, Saeed Hillal Eben Saeed, the eldest son of care must be taken not to get a scratch the imaum of Muskat, arrived at Southfrom the Briers and Thorns. "Tis Trew ampton, with his suite, last week. When that time might be more profitably em

the prince's arrival was communicated to ployed than in putting this Patch (batch) the government, captain Cogan was deputed of 'names together, or, baving, so many to receive and escort his highness to LonMasters, they may say the Style is not don, accommodation having been prepared Wright; but if to Read it amusement has for the prince and his suite in Brook-street. been afforded to any who liave not a heart The object of the prince's visit is said to be of Steele, it is to be hoped no one will feel that of obtaining information in respect to Cross, and say it is a Parcel of nonsense,

our government and institutions. without any Reason, and be ready to ex. claim, in a Pett, “ it is all Fudge!"Dorset Zerlina of the opera was Signora Bondini

,

Dealing with a Singer.-The original paper.

daughter of the manager. In rehearsing Drops of Comfort generally Administered that part of the finale of the first act by Friends.—Having your health proposed where she is seized by Don Giovanni, at the age of forty, as a “promising young there was some difficulty in getting her to

Reading a newspaper on a railway, scream in the right manner and place. It containing an account of five-and-twenty was tried repeatedly, and failed. At lives lost ” only the day before. Losing a length, Mozart, desiring the orchestra to heavy sum at cards, and all your friends repeat the piece, went quietly on the stage, wondering how you could have been “such and awaiting the time that she was to make a fool!” ”Putting on a white neckcloth, the exclamation, grasped her so suddenly, which you fancy becomes you, and being and so forcibly, that, really alarmed, she hailed all the evening as “ waiter.” Pub- shrieked out in good earnest.

He was lishing a novel which does not sell, and

now content. “ That's the way,” said he, reading in a review.—“ This work is equal praising her; “ you must cry out just in to anything of Ainsworth's.”. Breaking that manner.”Holmes's Mozart. down before ladies in the middle of a song, and a wag calling out "Encore.” Losing The Prussian government has purchased

T'wellings of Luther and Melancthon.your latch -key, and wife and mother-in- the two houses, in the town of Wittemlaw both sitting up for you. Having your gig nearly upset by an omnibus, and being berg; wherein Lyther and Melancthon reabused by the conductor for not seeing in each a free primary school. The two

sided, -with the intention of establishing ye're coming to.”—Punch.

great reformers are buried beneath the Italian Beauties.-"You have heard of the choir of the church of the castle of Witbright eyes and raven tresses and music; temberg; and on its magnificent gates, like language of the Neapolitans; but I burnt during the war, it was that Luther can assure you there is nothing like it here, affixed his ninety-five famous propositions. i. e. among the lower classes. The only These gates are about to be replaced, in difference that I can detect between them

exact conformity with the drawings of and our Indians is, that our wild bloods them, which remain—with this only ex, are the more beautiful of the two. The ception, that they will be of bronze instead colour is the same, the hair very like in: of sculptured wood. deed, and as to the soft bastard Latin' they speak, it is one of the most abomina- vince of Bahia diamonds have latterly been

Diamond Finding. In the town and proble dialects I ever heard. I know this is found of such value that gold is no longer rather shocking to one's ideas of Italian women. I am sure I was prepared to view sought for. One letter says, “Gold is comthem in a favourable, nay, in a poetical

mon and abundant in every brook, but do light; but amid all the charms and ex

man regards it; all are gathering dia

monds." citements of this romantic land, I cannot see otherwise. The old women are hags, H.A, Burslul, Printer, 2, Tavistock-street, suaad.

vere

[merged small][merged small][merged small][merged small][merged small][merged small][graphic][merged small][subsumed][ocr errors]

FROM A SKETCH BY NR. THOMAS GILKS.

BOULAY BAY, JERSEY. to enter at any tide. The views from the

surrounding heights are very grand. To

wards the north the islands of Guernsey, This is one of the most important bays in Alderney, and Sark, appear in the disthis picturesque island, the depth of water tance, while on part of the coast of Noroffering capabilities for the formation of a mandy, towards the north-eastern horizon, harbour superior to any of the others, the cathedral of Coutance is dimly seen in being sufficient for vessels of large draught the distance.

NO. 1289.

VOL. XLVI.

An intelligent traveller has well des- every man's door! All England made to cribed the scene. He says: “What a scene shake hands with itself in a few hours! of desolation and barrenness here strikes And when London can, in an hour or so, the eye-sterile and unproductive black go to the Land's End for a gulp of sea-air, masses of rock, induce us to believe we and the Land's End in the same time come have arrived at the verge of the habitable to see the shows of London-shan't all of world, the ancient geographers, in their ig us the better understand one another; norance, supposing that towards the con shan't we all be brought together, and fines of the earth it became a dreary waste, made, as we ought to be, one family of ! going suddenly down a sheer depth, as a It's coming fast, grandmother. Now pigs vast wall.” The attention of government can travel, I don't know how far, at a halfhas long been drawn to this bay, with a penny ahead, we don't hear the talk that view of establishing a naval station, which used to be of “the swinish multitude.” in time of war would not only be a safe- And isn't it a fine thing-I know you don't guard to the island, but an efficient pro- think so, but isn't it?—to know that all has tection to the trade of the channel, as well been done, and all that's to do, will be as a convenient point of observation from done, because Englishmen have left off which the movements of the French coast, cutting other men's throats! That peace from Cherbourg to Brest, might be watch: has done it all. If they oughtn't to set up ed. A pier on a very limited scale has a dove with an olive branch at every rail. been some time ago constructed, by direc- way terminus, I'm an impostor, and no tion of the states of Jersey, at a conside

true cabman. Yes, grandmother, peace rable cost; and this would naturally form has done it all! Only think of the iron the commencement of the government that has been melted into cannon and work, should such a work be resolved round shot, and chain shot, and all other upon.

sorts of shot—that the devils on a holiday This bay offers many opportunities to play at bowls with !—if the war had gone the angler, from the depth of water at the on—all the very same iron that's now

laid pier-head and islet. The fish taken are upon sleepers! Think of the iron that had mullet, whiting, rick-fish, bass, and"con- been fired into the sea, and banged through gers; the latter off the rocks, at some dis- quiet people's houses, and sent mashing tance to the right, many weighing from squares and squares of men-God's like. twenty to thirty pounds. A few years ago

nesses in red, blue, and green coats, hired an oyster bed was discovered, about six to be killed at so many pence a day-only miles from the shore, which promises a

think what would have been this wicked, rich harvest to the dredger, besides being I will say it, this blasphemous waste of some distance from the limits of the French metal-that, as it is, has been made into

T. G. steam engines. Very fine, indeed, they

say, is the roar of artillery; but what is

it to the roar of steam? I never see an THE PROGRESS OF RAILWAYS. engine, with its red hot coals and its clouds

of steam and smoke, that it doesn't seem (FROM THE HEDGEHOG LETTERS.)

to me like a tremendous dragon that has Dear Grandmother-As I don't think been tamed by man to carry all the blesyou have any liking for railways,-being, sings of civilisation to his fellow-creatures. like colonel Sibthorp, one of those folks I've read about knights going through the loving the good old times, when travelling skies on fiery monsters—but what are was as sober a thing as a waggon and four they to the engineers, at two pound five:&horses could make it-I really don't see week? What is any squire among 'em all how I'm to write you anything of a letter. to the humblest stoker? And then, I've There's nobody in town, and nothing in read about martial trumpets-why they the papers but plans of railways, that in haven't, to my ears, half the silver in their a little time will cover all England like a sound as the railway whistle! Well, I large spider's net; and, as in the net, there should like the ghost of Buonaparte to get will be a good many flies caught and gob- up some morning, and take the Times in bled up, by those who spin. Nevertheless, his thin hands. If be wouldn't turn yel. though, I know you don't agree with me lower than ever he was at St. Helena! any more than colonel Sibthorp does—it There he'd see plans for railways in France is a fine sight to open the newspapers, and -belly France, as I believe they call itsee the railway schemes. What mountains to be carried out by Frenchmen and Eng. of money they bring to the mind! And lishmen. Yes; he wouldn't see 'em mixing then for the wonders they're big with, why, bayonets, trying to poke'em in one another's properly considered, arn't they a thousand bowels that a few tons of blood might, as times more wonderful than anything in the they call it, water his laurels—how any “ Arabian Nights' Entertainments!” Then man can wear laurels at all, I can't tell, we have flying carriages to be brought to they must smell so of the slaughter-house!

coast.

-he wouldn't see 'em charging one They're goiug to fix up a statue to George another on the battle field, but quietly ar- Stephenson, in Newcastle. How you will ranged, cheek by jowl, in the list of direc cast up your dear old eyes, when

you hear tors. Not exchanging bullets, but club- of this! You, who've only thought that bing together their hard cash. Consider statues should be put up to queen Anne, it, grandınother, isn't it droll! Here, in and George III, and his nice son George these very lists, you see English captains IV, and such people! I should only like a and colonels in company with French vis- good many of the statues here in London to counts and barons, and I don't know what, be made to take a cheap train down to planning to lay iron down in France-to Newcastle to see it. If, dirty as they are, civilise and add to the prosperity of and dirty as they were, they wouldn't blush Frenchmen! The very captains and colo as red as a new copper halfpenny, why, nels who, but for the peace, would be those statues — especially when they've blowing French_ships out of the water queens and kings in 'em-are the most unknocking down French houses-and all the feelingest of metal! What a lot of man. while swearing it, and believing it, too, that gled bodies, and misery, and housebreakFrenchmen were only sent into this world ing, and wickedness of all sorts, carried on to be killed by Englishmen, just as boys and made quite lawful by a uniform-may think frogs were spawned only to be pelted we see---if we choose to see at all about at.. Oh, only give her time, and Peace, the statue of what we called a Conqueror ! timid dove as she is-will coo down the What firing of houses, what shame, that trumpet. Now, grandmother, only do think because you're a woman I won't more partiof lord Nelson as a railway director on the cularly write about; we might look upon Boulogne line to Paris! Well, I know you'll under the statue, that is only so high, be. say it—the world's going to be turned up- cause it has so much wickedness to stand side down. Perhaps it is; and after all, it upon! If the statue could feel at all, mightn't be the worse now and then for a wouldn't it put up its hands, and hide its little wholesome shaking. They do say face, although it were made of the best of there's to be a rail from Waterloo to Brus- bronze! But Mr. Stephenson will look sels, and the duke of Wellington—the iron kindly and sweetly about him; he will duke, with, I've no doubt, iron enough in know that he has carried comfort, and him for the whole line-is to be chairman knowledge, and happiness to the doors of of the directors. The prince Joinville is now millions—that he has brought men togeand then looking about our coasts to find out, ther, that they might know and love one it is said, which is the softest part of us, in another. Th something like having a the case of a war, to put his foot upon us. statue! I'm sure of it, when George IV Poor fellow! he's got the disease of glory; is made to hear the news (for kings are so only--as it sometimes happens with the very long before the truth comes to 'em), small. pox-it has struck inwards; it can't he'd like to gallop off to the first melter's, come out upon him. When we've railways and go at once into the nothing that men laid down, as I say, like a spider's web all think him. And besides all this, the railover the country, won't it be a little hard to ways have got a king! When you hear of a catch us asleep? For you see, just like the king of England, I know your old thoughts spider's web, the electric telegraph (in- go down to Westminster Abbey; and you quire what sort of a thing it is, for I hav'n't think of nothing but bishops and peers, and time to tell you), the electric telegraph all that sort of thing, kissing the king's will touch a line of the web, when down cheeks, and the holy oil upon the royal will come a tremendous spider; in a red head, that the crown,

I

suppose, may sit coat, with all sorts of murder after him! the more comfortably upon it; but this is Mind, grandmother, let us hope this never another sort of king—Mr. King Hudson may happen; but when folks who'd molest the first ! I have read it somewhere at a us, know how it can come about, won't they bookstall, that Napoleon was crowned with let us alone? Depend upon it, we're bind- the iron crown of Italy. Well, king Huding war over to keep the peace, and the son has been crowned with the iron crown bonds are made of railway iron! You'd of England ! A crown melted out of pighardly think it-you who used to talk to iron, and made in a railway furnace. I've me about the beauty of glory (I know somewhere seen the picture of the river you meant nothing but the red coats and Nile, that with the lifting of his finger the fine epaulets; for that so often is made the river flow over barren land, women's notion of glory, tho’ bless 'em, and leave there all sorts of blessings. Well, they're among the first to make lint, and king Hudson is of this sort; he has made ery over the sons of glory, with gashes the molten iron flow over all sorts of places, spoiling all their fine feathers)-you'd and so bring forth good fruits wherever it hardly think it, but they're going to put went. So no more from your affectionate up a statue to the man who first made boil- grandson, ing water to run upon a rail. It's quite

JUNIPER HEDGEHOG, true: I read it only a day or two ago.

« VorigeDoorgaan »