Pagina-afbeeldingen
PDF
ePub

and adorn the waste of waters. By what right, then, rational M

did Mr. Alken take away its innocent life? Whence did he dorive authority to slaughter that beautiful bird with a ruthless and cruel hand? Share on Mr.

Aiken! It was a wanton shedding of innocent blood. OCTOBER, 1857.

Shame on every man who kills without purpose, slay's without necessity, any of the harmless and beautiful

things of God! It was a cowardly thing in Mr. Aiken EDITORIAL NOTES AND GLEANINGS. to steal like a thief upon the security of its victim.

and then, like an assassin, strike it to death in an unTO PLEASE EVERYBODY is a task difficult in

guarded moment. It was 8 savage and inhuman act all cases; in the editorial management of a in Mr. Aiken to kill that beautiful bird. An honest

hearted man would not have done it. Shame on Mr. periodical, impossible. Indeed, if an editor

Aiken! Nature and humanity cry, Shame upon him! succeeds in pleasing himself, it is quite as much as he has a right to expect, and in a great many

SUICIDE IN FRANCE.-M. Lisle, & member of instances it is more than he is able to accom

the Imperial Academy of Medicine of France, plish. Let not correspondents wonder, then, if

has written a very able work on suicide, in their wishes are not always complied with, nor

which he conclusively proves that, so far as his readers think it a strange thing if occasionally

investigations are concerned, they are far from they meet with an article or a paragraph that

corroboratory of the opinion of Montesquieu and is not exactly in accordance with their own

the national Gallic belief touching the mortal taste. The editor shares the affliction with

ennui and the suicidal monomania of England. them, but relieves himself by reflecting that it

It appears from his statement that there were takes all sorts of people to make up a world,

in France, from 1836 to 1852 inclusive, 52,126 and that in the circle of his readers there is

suicides, or a mean of 3,066 a year; the numalmost every variety of taste and prejudice.

bers rising steadily from 2,340 in 1836, to 3,674 We have frequent illustrations of this fact. lin 18!

in 1852. From 1827 to 1830 the mean number By the same mail we have had letters applaud

had been only 1,800 a year. Before 1836 the ing and censuring the same article. Occasion

proportion was one suicide for every 17,693 ally a subscriber is so sensitive as to threaten

inhabitants; in 1836 it was one for 1,420. discontinuance because of a few lines which do

In 1852 it had risen to one for 9,340. In not exactly square with his own notions; and

1838 and 1839 England had one suicide for now and then a correspondent pours upon us a

every 15,900 inhabitants; France, one for pbial of wrath because of the rejection or ab

every 12,489. Between London and Paris, for breviation of his article. In the general, how |

the same years, the difference is yet more reever, we are on the best of terms with all our

markable, the figures being, for London, one in patrons, in which category we include those

8,250; and for Paris, one in 2,221. This is who write for us, and those who read what is

surely a sufficiently distinct contradiction to written. The great mass have too much good

the generally received opinion. sense to take offense where none is intended,

The north of France is the most prolific in or to expect from an editor the impossibility

suicides; nearly half of the whole number beof always pleasing everybody.

longs to the north, which has increased its

own ratio by one third. The north has one in Wanton DESTRUCTION OF LIFE. — The cele

6,483; the east, one in 13,855; the south, one brated botanist, Pursh, in one of his rambles

in 20,457. The department of the Seine, which in the Western wilderness, took a long nap includes Paris, has risen with frightful rapid. under the grateful shade of a large tree, far

ity; but Paris and Marseilles, and all large cenaway from the dwellings of men. On awaking

ters, are the foci of suicides to a very striking he saw, to his unutterable horror, a large rattle

extent. Russia stands the lowest of European snake coiled up within a few feet of him. The

states in the scale, her suicides being only one botanist started up and quietly proceeded, un

in 49,182; while Prussia has one in 14,404; harmed, upon his journey. But, said one, to

Austria, one in 20,900; New York, one in whom he related the adventure, did you not re

7,797 ; Boston, one in 12,500; Baltimore, one turn and kill the snake? No, indeed, was the

in 13,650; and Philadelphia, one in 11,873. calm reply. He spared my life, and I could

Climate has not much to do with the matter. not find it in my heart to take his. God made

In latitude from 42 deg. to 54 deg. the proporus both. This little incident was recalled by

tion is one in 38,882 ; from 54 deg. to 64 deg., a statement in one of the country papers that

one in 56,577. Yet the last figures include a Mr. Aiken had shot a beautiful swan some

Moscow and St. Petersburg, and represent a where in the State of Michigan, which the

much more rigorous, damp, uncertain, and jor. editor chronicled as a feat worthy of commen

less climate than the first. Certainly the low dation. The Albany Register, copying the state

condition of civilization between these latiment, comments upon it on this wise :

tudes influence the statistics to the full as "We do not think Mr. Aiken did a thing to boast much as any other assigned or assignable cause : of in shooting that beautiful swan.' What had that but that mere temperature and climate hare swan done to him; what wrong had it committed ;

little to do with the question is proved by the what harm to any living or dead thing, that he should take away its life! It was trespassing upon nobody's average number of suicides occurring in the possessions. It was where it had a perfect right to be. different months of the year of France, which It was in its own domain, and its charter was given it

are highest in the sunniest, brightest, and most by the Deity himself. It was just where nature intended it should be, where its instincts taught it to go.

enjoyable seasons. We cannot refrain from It was a harmless bird. It interfered with the rights giving the table entire; it opens a view so of no living thing. It was not a bird of prey. It had very different from the one popularly received. nothing to do with carnage. It simply floated upon the river, a buoyant and beautiful thing, one of the

The list is the average of seventeen years' ornaments fashioned by the great Creator to beautify computation.

For January, the mcan number of these ser wife and mother. Thon hast had thy trials, and so enteen years gives 3,761; for February, 3,529 ;

has thy good partner. I wish thy grandchild well for March, 4,423 ; for April, 4,872; May, through hers. She alluded to the l'rincess Charlotte.]

"It was so evident that the Friends meant kindly, 5,436; June, 5,722; July, 5,517; August,

nay, respectfully, that no offense could be taken. She 4,652 ; September, 3,959; October, 3,845; No escorted her guests throngh the estate. The Princess vember, 3,282; December, 3,227,

Elizabeth noticed in the hen house a breed of poultry

hitherto unknown to her, and expressed a wish to In age, the rate increases gradually from

possess some of these rare fowls, imagining that Mrs. under sixteen up to forty, when it slowly de

Mills would regard her wish as law; but the Quaker. creases to eighty and upward. The mass oc

ess merely remarked, with her characteristic evasion, curs in middle age; but there has been recently purchased in this land or other countries, I know of

• They are rare, as thou sayest; but if they are to be & noticeable increase of suicides by children, | few women likelier than thyself to procure them with which are now sevenfold what they were thirty ense." years ago for children under sixteen years of

"Her royal highness more plainly expressed her de.

sire to purchase some of those which she now beheld. age, twelve times as many for youths from sir "I do not buy and sell,' answered Rachel. teen to twenty. Esquirol says:

** Perhaps you will give me a pair ?" observed the

princess. "One youth leaves a writing before killing himself, ** Nay, verily,' replied Rachel Mills, “I have refused in which he bitterly blames his parents for the educa. many friends; and that which I denied to my own tion they have given him: another blasphemes God kinswoman, Martha Ash, it becometh me not to grant and society; a third kills himself because he has not

to any.

We have long had it to say that these birds enough air to breathe with ease:' two young men of belonged only to our house; and I can make no exletters, at the age of twenty-one each, suffocate them ception in thy favor."" selves with charcoal, because a theatrical piece which they have composed together has not succeeded; a child of thirteen bangs himsell, and leaves a document

EDUCATION OF CHILDREN.—Lord Brougham beginning: I bequeath my soul to Rousseau, and my

gives it as his opinion that the child learns body to the earth;' one of twelve hangs himself for more the first eighteen months of its life than rage at being only the twelfth in a school exercise where he expected a better place; and another, of thir

at any other period; in fact, settling its mental teen, hangs himself in a cell where he was unjustly

capacity and future well-being. Dr. Babbingconfined.

ton states the period of the first nine years as What a painful mass of il-regulated passion

the seed-time for life. The Roman Catholic and misdirected life lies in those few lines!

priest wants the child for the first seven years

of training, when its character is molded for The QUEEN AND THE QUAKERESS.—We take

time and eternity. If the early training of the the following amusing account of a visit paid

child is of such paramount importance, should by her late Majesty, Queen Charlotte, while

not those who naturally have the care of infants staying at Bath, a celebrated watering place,

and young children, mothers and nurses, be thorfrom an English periodical. The time spoken

oughly instructed themselves before undertakof was the summer of 1815 :

ing this great work of educators ? Who will

establish a school for children's nurses ? It is “The waters soon effected such a respite from pain more needed in our country than institutions in the royal patient that she proposed an excursion to for idiots. a park of some celebrity in the neighborhood, then the estate of a rich widow lady belonging to the Society of Friends. Notice was given of the queen's intentioni,

Robert Browning is the fortunate possessor and a message returned that she would be welcome! of one of the two locks of Milton's hair now in Our illustrious traveler bad, perhaps, never before any personal intercourse with a member of the persuasion

existence. They have fallen into the right whose rotaries never voluntarily paid taxes to the

hands. Both originally belonged to Leigh man George, called king by the vain ones.' The lady Hunt, who divided his treasure with Browning, and gentleman who were to attend the royal visitants asking in exchange a lock of Mrs. Browning's had but feeble ideas of the reception to be expected. It was supposed that the Quaker would, at least, say

and his hair. It would be difficult to decide on *Thy Majesty,' • Thy Highness,' or · Madame.'

which side the compliment was most delicate * 'The royal carriage arrived at the lodge of the park

and fitting. Milton's hair came to Hunt from punctually at the appointed hour. No preparations Dr. Johnson's family, with a lock, also, of the appeared to have been made; no hostess or domestics stood ready to greet the guest. The porter's bell was astute critic's, who received it directly from the rung; he stepped forth deliberately with his broad descendants of the republican poet himself. Its brimmed beaver on, and unbendingly accosted the lord

genuineness is beyond impeachment, and it has in waiting with,. What's thy will, friend!' " This was almost unreasonable. Surely,' said the

been always in the keeping of great and kinnobleman, 'your inistress is aware that her majesty dred souls; so that, both from its origin and subgo to your mistress and say that the queen is here.'

sequent associations, I look upon this relic as "No, truly,' answered the man, 'it needeth not I have no mistress or lady; but my friend Rachel

one of the most precious and suggestive that Mills expects thine. Walk in.'

exists of the material existence of one of earth's "The queen and the princoss were handed out, and noblest souls. walked up the avenue. At the door of the house stood the plainly attired Rachel, who, without even a courtesy, but with a cheerful nod, said, “How's thee do,

A SHREWD DECISION of Ali, CALIPH OF BAGfriend! I am glad to see thee and thy daughter. I DAD.-In the Preliminary Dissertation to Rich. wish thee well. Rest and refresh thee and tly people, ardson's " Arabic Dictionary,” 2 vols. 4to, 1806, before I show thee my grounds.' ** What could be said to such a person? Some con

the following curious anecdote is recorded : dercension was attempted, implying that her majesty came not only to view the park, but to testify ber es "Two Arabians sat down to dinner: one had firo teem for the society to wliich Mistress Mills belonged. loaves, the other three. A stranger passing by desired Cool and unawed, she said, 'Yes, thou art right there. permission to eat with them, which they agreed to. The Friends are well thought of by most folks; but The stranger dined, laid down eight pieces of money, they need not the praise of the world; for the rest, and departed. The proprietor of the five loaves took inany strangers gratify their curiosity by going over np five pieces, and left three for the other, who obthis place, and it is my custom to conduct them my jected, and insisted on having one half

. The cause self; therefore I will do the like by thee, friend Char came before Ali, who gave the following judgment: Lotte. Moreover, I think well of thee, as s dutiful | Lot the owner of the five loaves have seven pieces of

money, and the owner of the three loaves one; for, ir STAR Gazing Made Easy.— The Scientific we divide the eight loaves by three, they make twenty American gives a very simple mode of examinfour parts; of which he who laid down the fire loaves had difteen, while he who laid down three had only ing the satellites of the planet Jupiter. On a nine; as all fared alike, and eight shares was each clear night take a looking-glass, and, either at man's proportion, the stranger ate seven parts of the the window or out of doors, so place it as to refirst man's property, and only one belonging to the

ceive the impression of the planet. By a close other; the money, in justice, inust be divided accordiugly.""

examination of the planet as reflected in the

glass, all its satellites will also be observed, IMPORTANT, IF TRUE.—The Courrier du Cana- provided none of them are eclipsed. It is rather da, a Roman Catholic journal, comforts its read- remarkable, however, that although these satelers by the announcement that the unfortunate lites can thus be seen, while they cannot be passengers who were lost by hundreds by the seen with the naked eye, that neither Venus burning of the steamboat Montreal, were all nor the Moon can be seen as distinctly by resaved in the other world, without their knowl- fection as they can by observing them with the edge, through the presence of mind and liberal naked eye. benevolence of a priest who witnessed their extremity from the shore. The following is the BOSSUET AND MASSILLOX. - The following statement of the Courrier:

passage from the journal of Le Dieu, illustrates

the contrast between the mode of delivery * The Rev. M. Baillargeon, Curé of St. Nicholas, before a single soul perished, gave absolution to all the adopted by Bossuet and by Massillon. The latunfortunate passengers. He was in his own parish on ter used to say that his best sermon was that the opposite shore of the St. Lawrence, observed the which he knew the best. He committed acdanger in which the lives of those on board were, and pronounced the absolution."

curately, and the less the memory had to esert

itself, the more freedom was gained for feeling SUITING THE ACTION TO THE WORD.-The

and for action. But no two of Bossuet's serlatest pulpit anecdote we have seen is the fol

mons were exactly alike in phraseology. Even lowing, illustrative of the manner in which the

when they were most carefully written, he celebrated preacher, Spurgeon, in London, at

could not feel at ease unless, by means of martracts attention :

ginal variations, he had the choice between two

or three modes of expression, from which he "Upon one occasion, he told the assembled multitude that the way to hell was smooth and easy, like might select according to the state in which he this,' said he; and he straightway opened the pulpit

saw his audience. Thus it will be seen that door, put his foot over the banister, and slid down, as Bossuet conformed much more nearly than his you have often seen little boys.do. He then stopped great cotemporary to the method recommended hard, like this,' and pulled himself up again, which by Fénélon, in his masterly Dialogues on Elowas rather difficult; but the congregation received quence : this practical illustration with great applause."

HOW BOSSUET PREPARED HIS SERMONS. DEATH IN LIFE.—The following is from an " He was determined in his choice of a subject by article by Oliver W. Holmes, in the last number the consideration of persons, place, and time. Liko of the North American review :

the holy fathers, he adapted his instructions or his re

bukes to the present wants of his hearers. Hence it “If the reader of this paper live another complete was that throughout an Advent or a Lent he could year, his self-conscious principle will have migrated only prepare during the interval between one sermon from its present tenement to another, the raw material and another. Accordingly, he never understood those even of which are not as yet put together. A portion great Lenten courses in which it is customary to preach of that body of his which is to be, will ripen in the every day. He could not have supported the labor; corn of the next harvest. Another portion of his future so intense was his application, and so animated his deperson he will purchase, or others will purchase for livery. When at work, he would put on paper his him, headed up in the form of certain barrels of pota- plan, his text, his proofs, either in French or Latin, toes. A third fraction is yet to be gathered in a South indifferently, without troubling himself about the ern rice field. The limbs with which he is then to language, turns of expression, or figures of speech. I walk will be clad with flesh borrowed from the ten have heard him say a hundred tiines than any other ants of inany stalls and pastures, now unconscious of method would have rendered his delivery feeble, and their doom. The very organs of speech with which taken the life and force out of his sermon. he is to talk so wisely, pleail so eloquently, or preach “On this unformed material be used to meditate 80 effectively, must first serve his humbler brethren profoundly during the morning of the day on which to bleat, to bellow, and for all the varied utterances of he had to preach, and most frequently, without writing bristled or feathered barn-yard life. His bones them anything additional, in order not to interrupt his selves are, to a great extent, in posse, and not in esse. thoughts; for his imagination was far more rapid than

"A bag of phosphate of lime which he has ordered from Professor Mapes, for his grounds, contains a large “When master of the thoughts which had presented part of what it is to be his next year's skeleton. And themselves, ho fixed in his memory the very ex. more than all this, and by far the greater part of his pressions he intended to use. Then, in & meditation body is nothing, after all, but water, the main sub during the afternoon, he went over his sermon in his stance of his scattered members is to be looked for in head, reading it with the eye of his mind, as though it the reservoir, in the running streams, at the bottom of had been set down on paper, altering, adding, and rethe well, in the clouds that float over his head, or dif trenching, as though pen in hand. Finally, when in fused among them all."

the pulpit, and during the delivery, he followed the

impression of his words on the congregation, and in INGENIOUS EXAMPLE.—The difficulty of ap

an instant, mentally canceling what he bad prepared,

and giving himself to the thought of the inomeni, plying rules to the pronunciation of our lan

would press bome that part by wbich (as the faces guage may be illustrated in two lines, where told him) their hearts were softened or alarmed." combination of the letters ough is pronounced in no less than seven different ways, viz., as 0,

THE GOLDEX TOOTH.-In 1593 it was reported uf, of, up, ow, oo, and ock.

that a Silesian child, seven years old, had lost

all its teeth, and that a golden tooth had grown " Though the tough cough and hiccough plough no

One

in the place of a natural double one. through, O'er life's dark lough my course I still pursue.

learned man after another wrote volumes on

his pen.

[merged small][merged small][ocr errors]

PLAIN ENGLISH.-B. F. Taylor has some sens CHEAP ADVERTISING. — It has become quite ible hints on a very common propensity of fashionable for dealers to paint their cards writers and public speakers, and the practice upon the sidewalks, fences, etc. A short time of imitating their grandiloquence in conversa since we were amused at the handicraft of a tion. He says:

waggish clerk, who finding & business card " It is worthy of remark, that none but common

painted upon a flag-stone, penciled over it, in people ever go to bed' or bid you good-night;' they

d-night; they neat capitals, invariably retire' or give you good evening. Nobody is a woman' that doesn't work out for a living.

IN MEMORY OF Invalids do not get well;' they only convalesce;' ladies dispose their head-dresses, though they never

by way of a prefix. comb their hair; when gentlemen eat cold beans, | We saw a man beat at this game in a neighthey dignify it into partaking of a slight repast.'

boring city the other day. Upon a fence was "The dray horses hear the better Saxon-but worse morality, it may be-than some of the audiences, not

painted, in big black letters, horses, that wait on public speakers; good, strong Saxon, as direct as a sunbeam: & little coarse, you say,

GO TO MARKHAM'S, but not coarser than is woven into songs that everybody, from Fletcher of Saltoun down to to-day, has under which some rival dealer has painted, wanted the making of, let alone the laws."

IF YOU WANT TO BE SKINNED. What can be more home-spun Saxon than,

This beats the quack medicine man who “The curfew tolls the knell of parting day,

The lowing herd winds slowly o'er the lea, painted up
The plowman homeward plods his weary way,
And leaves the world to darkness and to me."

TAKE DR. HOBENSACK'S PILLS, " When a man grows eloquent, it is the Saxon ele- and along came a tract vender, and stuck up ment that lends wings to his thought; so whole paragraphs from Webster and Everett are all English, and

| under it, so as to continue the sense, whole columns from sophomores are as full with Latin roots, and Greek particularly, as Cicero's coun

PREPARE TO MEET THY GOD. try-seat, or an Athenian garden."

A friend at our elbow suggested that he saw

in Brooklyn the other day a poster reading, SMALL CHANGE.

LECTURE TO-NIGHT BY MR. CHAPIN, ABOUT KANSAS.—The Tribune of this city, as | under which protruded in bright letters, all who have been in the habit of reading it are aware, was, day after day, for a long time, THE MOST SUCCESSFUL VERMIFUGE IN engaged in the discussion of matters and things

. THE WORLD. in Kansas. Some time ago a Quaker gentleman

Gratis advertisers may as well beware of cross presented himself to one of the editors, and re

readings. quested to see a copy of the Tribune. On being asked what particular number of the paper

THE DUEL.—Burton, in his “Cyclopedia of he wished to see, Ambrose innocently replied

Wit and Humor," quotes the following reply that he had forgotten the date, but he wanted

to a challenge from & work published in 1796, to see the one which “contained that article

and entitled “ Modern Chivalry :" about Kansas!"

"SIR.-I have two objections to this duel matter.

The one is, lest I should hurt you; and the other is, A Yankee made a bet with a Dutchman that

lest you should hurt me. I do not see any good it he could swallow him. The Dutchman lay would do me to put a bullet through any part of your down upon the table, and the Yankee, taking

body. I could make no use of you when dead for any

culinary purpose, as I would a rabbit or a turkey. I his big toe in his mouth, nipped it severely.

am no cannibal to feed on the flesh of men. Why, then, “0, you are biting me," roared the Dutchman. shoot down a human creature of which I could make “ Why, you old fool," said the Yankee, “ did no use? A buffalo would be better meat. For though you think I was going to swallow you whole ?”

your flesh may be delicate and tender, yet it wants that

firmness and consistency which takes and retains salt. This was the same ingenious gentleman who At any rate, it would not be fit for long ses voyages. laid & wager with Smith that he could throw You might make a good barbecue, it is true, being of him clear across a twenty foot canal. He made

the nature of a raccoon or an opossum; but people are

not in the habit of barbecuing anything buman now. one trial, and Smith brought up, or rather down,

As to your hide, it is not worth taking off, being little in tbe middle of the raging element. Paddling better than that of a year old colt. his way out as best he could, Smith claimed the "It would seem to me a strange thing to shoot at & bet. “Pooh! pooh !" cried the other, “I don't give

man that would stand still to be shot at, inasmuch as

I have been heretofore used to shoot at things flying it up so. I shall keep on trying till I succeed !"

or running, or jumping. Were you on a tree now,

like a squirrel, endeavoring to hide yourself in the “My wife,” said a wag the other day," came

branches, or like a raccoon, that, after much eyeing and

spying, I observe at length in the crotch of a tall oak, near calling me honey last night."

with boughs and leaves intervening, so that I could “ Indeed! how was that?"

just get a sight of his hinder parts, I should think it “Why, she called me "Old Bees Wax!' This pleasurable enough to take a shot at you. But as it was borrowed, probably, from the saying of a

is, there is no skill or judgment requisite either to dis

cover or take you down. renowned wag who, on returning from a college" As to myself, I do not much like to stand in the

way of anything harmful. I am under apprehensions USES OF POODLES.—A lady who kept one of you might hit me. That being the case, I think it these curly abominations, recently lost her pet, most advisable to stay at a distance. If you want to try your pistols, take some object, a tree or a barn-door,

and called upon a policeman to find it. The about my dimensions. If you hit that send me word, next day the officer came with the dog, which and I shall acknowledge that if I had been in the same was wet and dirty. The lady was overjoyed, place you might also have hit me.

and asked forty silly questions, among others : "Joux Farrago, late Captain Penn. Militia MAJOR VALENTINE JACKO, U. S. Army."

"Where did you find the dear baby?

Why, marm,” replied the officer, "a big A Georgia paper publishes the following negro up in Sullivan street had him tied to a spicy correspondence :

pole, and was washing windows with him." COVINGTON, March 24. CASHIER BANK OF WEST TENNESSEE-SIR - In. MORMON Wives.--A Deseret muse thus endosed you have a bill on your bank, which is rejected by my exchange broker; if it is worth anything, send larges on the duties of a good wife, and shows me its value in current money, if deal broke, please what is expected of such. The "poetry" from send me a lock of your hair. Respectfully,

which we copy is contained in a late number L. B.

of the Deseret Neros : MEYPINIS, Tenn., March 81.

"Now, sisters, list to what I say: DEAR SIR, -Inclosed I hand you S. C. bill for your

With trials this world is rife, note, same amount, received in yours of the 24th. I You can't expect to miss them all, am nearly bald, or I would send you the lock of hair.

Help husband get a wife!
If you say so, I will send you a front tooth.

Now this advice I freely give,
Yours truly,

If exalted you would be,
CHAS. D. SMITH, Prest

Remember that your husband must

Be blessed with more than thee.
COVINGTOX, April 2.

Then, O let us say,
DEAB SIP,-Yours of the 81st ultimo is at hand,

God bless the wife that strives, covering the needful, for which accept thanks. I sup

And aids her husband all she can pose you used the razor freely on others, as is usual

To obtain a dozen wives." with gentlemen in your line, but I had no idea you kept up the custom of shaving your own cranium, like the ancient Shylocks of Jewish descent. Save the A clergyman, not thirty miles from Boston, molar to grind the poor, and you will doubtless find who was noted for his nicety of pronunciation, your "front teeth” capable of much to sustain your

went to a shoemaker and engaged a pair of circulation. Yours truly,

LB.

boots to be made. A few days after he called Uri Osgood and Jonathan Aiken were on op

and inquired if they were ready, and was anposite sides of politics last fall in Grundy county,

swered in the negative. and the fight between them--they were run

“Will they be ready by next Chewsday?" ning for Congress-grew warm and desperate.

asked the clergyman. One day when they met on the stump, Uri,

"No," said the shoemaker; "but you shall whose head was bald, and should therefore have

have them by next Chaterday." been cooler, in the midst of his indignation turned upon Jonathan and said :

General Sir Charles J. Napier tells the follow"I think, sir, you have but one idea in your ing story of his childhood : head, and that is a very small one; if it should “ There was in Limerick a great coarse woman, wife swell, it would burst it."

of Dr. Murphy: When she heard of iny inisfortune, Whereat Jonathan grew red in the face, and

she said, ' Poor boy! I suppose a fly kicked his spindle

sbanks.' Being a little fellow then, though now, bo looking for a moment at the bare and venerable it known, five feet seven inches and a hali high, this head of his opponent, asked if he should say offended me greatly; and, as the Lord would have it, what he thought of him.

she broke her own leg just as I was getting well.

Going to her house with an appearance of concern, I “Say on," said Uri.

told the servant how sorry I was to hear that a bul“Well, I think you haven't one in your head, lock had kicked Mrs. Murphy and hurt its leg very and never had; there's been one scratching much, and that I had called to know if her leg was

also hurt. She never forgave me." around on the outside, trying to get in, till it has scratched all the hair off, but it's never got

AMERICA, AS SEEN THROUGH FRENCH Specin, and never will."

TACLES.-A Frenchman recently wrote a book Uri was silent.

on the United States of America. Among the Spanish robbers are very polite. An English

facts he gives the following: man was once accosted on a lonely road by a

“The thirteen stripes on our flag are the thirteen ruffian.

present States of the confederation, and the thirty-one

stars the States it is expected will be added ! The “Sir," said he, "you have my coat on; may Governor of the United States is chosen every two I trouble you for it ?

years! Pennsylvania is a large town in Philadelphia The Englishman drew out a pistol and told

and the Chief Admiral' and the Commander-in

Chief' are one and the same person !" the fellow he was mistaken. “Sir," said the robber, “I perceive that I

After this, the Dickenses, the Trollopes, and am. Will you do me the honor to communicate

the Marryatts may hide their diminished heads. your name, that I may remember you in my prayers.”

A young friend of ours was engaged in teach

ing mutes. He was explaining by signs the “Reply, sir,” said a judge to a blunt old use and meaning of the participle “dis," and Quaker, who was on the stand. “Do you know requested one of them to write on the blackwhat we sit here for ?"

board a sentence showing her knowledge of the “Yes, verily I do," said the Quaker; "three sense of the prefix. A bright little one stepped of you for four dollars each day, and the fat one forward and wrote the following: “ Boys love in the middle for four thousand a year!" to play, but girls to dis-play."

« VorigeDoorgaan »