Ant. S. There's not a man I meet but doth salute me As if I were their well acquainted friend; And shew'd me silks that he had bought for me, And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here. Enter DROMIO of Syracuse. Dro. S. Master, here's the gold you sent me for.What, have you got the picture of old Adam new apparelled? Ant. S. What gold is this? what Adam dost thou mean? Dro. S. Not that Adam that kept the paradise, but that Adam that keeps the prison: he that goes in the calf's-skin that was killed for the prodigal; he that came behind you, Sir, like an evil angel, and bid you forsake your liberty. Ant. S. I understand thee not. Dro. S. No? why, 'tis a plain case: he that went, like a base-viol, in a case of leather; the man, Sir, that, when gentlemen are tired, gives them a fob, and 'rests them; he, Sir, that takes pity on decayed men, and gives them suits of durance; he that sets up his rest to do more exploits with his mace, than a morrispike. Ant. S. What! thou mean'st an officer? Dro. S. Ay, Sir, the sergeant of the band; he, that brings any man to answer it, that breaks his band: one that thinks a man always going to bed, and says, "God give you good rest!" Is Ant. S. Well, Sir, there rest in your foolery. there any ship puts forth to-night? may we be gone? Dro. S. Why, Sir, I brought you word, an hour since, that the bark Expedition put forth to-night; and then were you hindered by the sergeant, to tarry for the hoy Delay. Here are the angels that you sent for, to deliver you. Ant. S. The fellow is distract, and so am I; And here we wander in illusions: Some blessed power deliver us from hence! Enter a Courtezan. Cour. Well met, well met, master Antipholus. Ant. S. Satan, avoid! I charge thee, tempt me not! Dro. S. Nay, she is worse, she is the devil's dam; and here she comes in the habit of a light wench; and thereof comes, that the wenches say, "God damn me;" that's as much as to say, "God make me a light wench." It is written, they appear to men like angels of light light is an effect of fire, and fire will burn; ergo, light wenches will burn: come not near her. Cour. Your man and you are marvellous merry, Sir. Will you go with me? We'll mend our dinner here. Dro. S. Master, if you do, expect spoon-meat, or bespeak a long spoon. Ant. S. Why, Dromio? Dro. S. Marry, he must have a long spoon, that must eat with the devil. Ant. S. Avoid then, fiend! what tell'st thou me of Thou art, as you are all, a sorceress: I conjure thee to leave me, and be gone. [supping? Cour. Give me the ring of mine you had at dinner, Or, for my diamond, the chain you promised; And I'll be gone, Sir, and not trouble you. Dro. S. Some devils ask but the paring of one's A rush, a hair, a drop of blood, a pin, A nut, a cherrystone: but she, more covetous, [nail, Master, he wise; and if you give it her, Ant. S. Avaunt, thou witch!--Come, Dromio, let us go Of his own doors being shut against his entrance. SCENE IV.-The same. [Ezit. Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus and an Officer. Ant. E. Fear me not, man, I will not break away; I'll give thee, ere I leave thee, so much money To warrant thee, as I am 'rested for. My wife is in a wayward mood to-day, And will not lightly trust the messenger. That I should be attach'd in Ephesus, I tell you, 'twill sound harshly in her ears. Enter DROMIO of Ephesus with a rope's end. Here comes my man; I think he brings the money. How now, Sir? have you that I sent you for? Dro. E. Here's that, I warrant you, will pay them Ant. E. But where's the money? [all. Dro. E. Why, Sir, I gave the money for the rope. Ant. E. Five hundred ducats, villain, for a rope? Dro. E. I'll serve you, Sir, five hundred at the rate. Ant. E. To what end did I bid thee hie thee home? Dro. E. To a rope's end, Sir; and to that end am I returned. Ant. E. And to that end, Sir, I will welcome you. Offi. Good Sir, be patient. Dro. E. Nay, rather persuade him to hold his hands. Ant. E. Thou art sensible in nothing but blows, and so is an ass. Dro. E. I am an ass, indeed; you may prove it by my long ears. I have served him from the hour of my nativity to this instant, and have nothing at his hands for my service but blows. When I am cold, he heats me with beating; when I am warm, he cools me with beating: I am waked with it, when I sleep; raised with it, when I sit; driven out of doors with it, when I go from home; welcomed home with it, when I return: nay, I bear it on my shoulders, as a beggar wont her brat; and, I think, when he hath lamed me, I shall beg with it from door to door. Enter ADRIANA, LUCIANA, and the Courtezan, with PINCH, and others. Ant. E. Come, go along; my wife is coming yonder. Dro. E. Mistress, respice finem, respect your end; or rather the prophecy, like the parrot, "Beware the rope's end." [Beats him. Ant. E. Wilt thou still talk? Adr. His incivility confirms no less.- Luc Alas, how fiery and how sharp he looks! Tid this companion with the saffron face Adr. O husband, God doth know, you dined at home, Ant. E. I dined at home! Thou villain, what say'st thou? Dro. E. Sir, sooth to say, you did not dine at home. Dro. E. Certes, she did; the kitchen-vestal scorn'd you. Ant. E. And did not I in rage depart from thence? Dro. E. In verity you did;-my bones bear witness, That since have felt the vigour of his rage. Adr. Is't good to soothe him in these contraries? And, yielding to him, humours well his frenzy. Ant. E. Thou hast suborn'd the goldsmith to arrest Adr. Alas, I sent you money to redeem you, By Dromio here, who came in haste for it. [me. Dro. E. Money by me? heart and good-will you might, But surely, master, not a rag of money. Ant. E. Went'st not thou to her for a purse of ducats? Adr. He came to me, and I deliver'd it. Lue. And I am witness with her, that she did. Dro. E. God and the rope-maker, bear me witness, That I was sent for nothing but a rope! Pinch. Mistress, both man and master is possess'd: I know it by their pale and deadly looks: They must be bound, and laid in some dark room. Ant. E. Say, wherefore didst thou lock me forth toAnd why dost thou deny the bag of gold? [day, Adr. I did not, gentle husband, lock thee forth. Dro. E. And, gentle master, I received no gold; But I confess, Sir, that we were lock'd out. Adr. Dissembling villain, thou speak'st false in both. Ant. E. Dissembling harlot, thou art false in all; And art confederate with a damned pack, To make a loathsome abject scorn of me: But with these nails I'll pluck out these false eyes, That would behold me in this shameful sport. [PINCH and his Assistants bind ANT. E. and DRO. E. Adr. O, bind him, bind him, let him not come near me. Pinch. More company;-the ficnd is strong within him. Luc. Ah me, poor man, how pale and wan he looks! Ant. E. What, will you murder me? Thou jailer, I am thy prisoner; wilt thou suffer them To make a rescue? Off. Masters, let him go; He is my prisoner, and you shall not have him. Pinch. Go, bind this man, for he is frantic too. Adr. What wilt thou do, thou peevish officer? Hast thou delight to see a wretched man Do outrage and displeasure to himself? off. He is my prisoner; if I let him go, The debt he owes will be required of me. Adr. I will discharge thee, ere I go from thee: Bear me forthwith unto his creditor, And, knowing how the debt grows, I will pay it. [thou, Dro. E. Master, I am here enter'd in bond for you. Ant. E. Out on thee, villain! wherefore dost thou mad Dro. E. Will you be bound for nothing? be mad, [me? Good master; cry, the devil. Luc. God help, poor souls, how idly do they talk! Adr. Go bear him hence.-Sister, go you with me.[Exeunt Pisca and Assistants with ANT. E. and DRO. E. Say now, whose suit is he arrested at? Off. One Angelo, a goldsmith: do you know him? Adr. I know the man. What is the sum he owes? Off. Two hundred ducats. Adr. Say, how grows it due? Of. Due for a chain your husband had of him. Adr. He did bespeak a chain for me, but had it not. Cour. Whenas your husband, all in rage, to-day Came to my house, and took away my ring, (The ring I saw upon his finger now.) Straight after did I meet him with a chain. Adr. It may be so, but I did never see it.Come, jailer, bring me where the goldsmith is, I long to know the truth hereof at large. Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse, with his Rapier drawn, and DROMIO of Syracuse. Luc. God, for thy mercy! they are loose again. Adr. And come with naked swords; let's call more To have them bound again. [help, Off. Away, they'll kill us. [Exeunt Officer, ADR., and Luc. Ant. S. I see these witches are afraid of swords. Dro. S. She that would be your wife now ran from you. Ant. S. Come to the Centaur; fetch our stuff from I long that we were safe and sound aboard. [thence: Dro. S. Faith, stay here this night, they will surely do us no harm; you saw, they speak us fair, give us gold: methinks, they are such a gentle nation, that but for the mountain of mad flesh that claims marriage of me, I could find in my heart to stay here still, and turn witch. Ant. S. I will not stay to-night for all the town; Therefore away, to get our stuff aboard. ACT V. SCENE I.-The same. Enter Merchant and ANGELO. [Exeunt Ang. I am sorry, Sir, that I have hinder'd you; Mer. How is the man esteem'd here in the city? Of credit infinite, highly belov'd, Second to none that lives here in the city; Enter ANTIPHOLUS and DROMIO of Syracuse. That you would put me to this shame and trouble; Ant. S. Thou art a villain to impeach me thus: [They draw. Enter ADRIANA, LUCIANA, Courtezan, and others. Adr. Hold, hurt him not, for God's sake; he is mad.Some get within him, take his sword away: Bind Dromio too, and bear him to my house. Dro. S. Run, master, run; for God's sake, take a This is some priory;-in, or we are spoil'd. [house. [Exeunt ANT. S. and DRO. S. to the Priory, Enter the Abbess. Abb. Be quiet, people. Wherefore throng you hither? Adr. To fetch my poor distracted husband hence: Let us come in, that we may bind him fast, And bear him home for his recovery. Ang. I knew he was not in his perfect wits. Mer. I am sorry now that I did draw on him. Abb. How long hath this possession held the man? Adr. This week he hath been heavy, sour, and sad, And much, much different from the man he was; But, till this afternoon, his passion Ne'er brake into extremity of rage. Abb. Hath he not lost much wealth by wreck at sea? Buried some dear friend? Hath not else his eye Stray'd his affection in unlawful love? A sin, prevailing much in youthful men, Adr. To none of these, except it be the last; 72 Adr. Why, so I did. Abb. Ay, but not rough enough. COMEDY OF ERRORS. Adr. As roughly as my modesty would let me. Adr. And in assemblies too. Abb. Ay, but not enough. Adr. It was the copy of our conference. In bed, he slept not for my urging it; At board, he fed not for my urging it; Still did I tell him it was vile and bad. Abb. And thereof came it, that the man was mad: The venom clamours of a jealous woman It seems his sleeps were hinder'd by thy railing: Thou say'st his meat was sauced with thy upbraidings: Thereof the raging fire of fever bred: And what's a fever but a fit of madness? Thou say'st his sports were hinder'd by thy brawls: Adr. She did betray me to my own reproof.- Abb. No, not a creature enters in my house. Adr. I will attend my husband, be his nurse, It is a branch and parcel of mine oath, A charitable duty of my order; Therefore depart, and leave him here with me. Adr. I will not hence and leave my husband here; Abb. Be quiet, and depart; thou shalt not have him. Mer. To see a reverend Syracusan merchant, Against the laws and statutes of this town, Ang. See, where they come; we will behold his death. Duke. Yet once again proclaim it publicly, Adr. Justice, most sacred duke, against the abbess! It cannot be that she hath done thee wrong. Adr. May it please your grace, Antipholus, my hus- Whom I made lord of me and all I had, Doing displeasure to the citizens, By rushing in their houses, bearing thence He broke from those that had the guard of him; Nor send him forth, that we may bear him hence. When thou didst make him master of thy bed, 1 will determine this before I stir. Enter a Servant. Serv. O mistress, mistress, shift and save yourself! Beaten the maids a-row, and bound the doctor, Whose beard they have singed off with brands of fire; Great pails of puddled mire to quench the hair: Adr. Peace, fool, thy master and his man are here: Serv. Mistress, upon my life, I tell you true; I have not breathed almost since I did see it. Adr. Ah me, it is my husband! Witness you, Even now we housed him in the abbey here; justice! Even for the service that long since I did thee, Ant. E. Justice, sweet prince, against that woman She whom thou gav'st to me to be my wife; That she this day hath shameless thrown on me. While she with harlots feasted in my house. Duke. A grievous fault.-Say, woman, didst thou so? Ant. E. My liege, I am advised what I say: My wife, her sister, and a rabble more Of vile confederates; along with them They brought one Pinch; a hungry, lean-faced villain, A threadbare juggler, and a fortune-teller; And, gazing in mine eyes, feeling my pulse, Ran hither to your grace; whom I beseech Το give me ample satisfaction For these deep shames and great indignities. Ang. My lord, in truth, thus far I witness with him, That he dined not at home, but was lock'd out. Duke. But had he such a chain of thee, or no? Mer. Besides, I will be sworn, these ears of mine Duke. Why, what an intricate impeach is this! If here you housed him, here he would have been; Dro. E. Sir, he dined with her there, at the Porcupine. Erit an Attendant. ge. Most mighty duke, vouchsafe me speak a word; Haply I see a friend will save my life, And pay the sum that may deliver me. Duke. Speak freely, Syracusan, what thou wilt. Ege. Is not your name, Sir, called Antipholus? And is not that your bondman Dromio? Dro. E. Within this hour I was his bondman, Sir, But he, I thank him, gnaw'd in two my cords; Now am I Dromio, and his man, unbound. Ege. I am sure you both of you remember me. Dro. E. Ourselves we do remember, Sir, by you; For lately we were bound, as you are now. You are not Pinch's patient, are you, Sir? Ege. Why look you strange on me? you know me well. Ant. E. I never saw you in my life till now. Ege. Oh! grief hath changed me since you saw me last; And careful hours, with Time's deformed hand, Have written strange defeatures in my face: But tell me yet, dost thou not know my voice? Ant. E. Neither. Ege. Dromio, nor thou? Dro. E. No, trust me, Sir, nor I. Ege. I am sure thou dost. Dro. E. Ay, Sir; but I am sure I do not; and whatsoever a man denies, you are now bound to believe him. Ege. Not know my voice! O, time's extremity! Yet hath my night of life some memory, Ant. E. I never saw my father in my life. Ege. But seven years since, in Syracusa, boy, Thou know'st we parted: but perhaps, my son, Thou sham'st to acknowledge me in misery. Ant. E. The duke, and all that know me in the city, Can witness with me that it is not so; I ne'er saw Syracusa in my life. Duke. I tell thee, Syracusan, twenty years Have I been patron to Antipholus, During which time he ne'er saw Syracusa : I see, thy age and dangers make thee dote. Enter the Abbess, with ANTIPHOLUS of Syracuse, and DROMIO of Syracuse. Abb. Most mighty duke, behold a man much wrong'd. [All gather to see him. Adr. I see two husbands, or mine eyes deceive me. Duke. One of these men is Genius to the other; And so of these: which is the natural man, And which the spirit? Who deciphers them? Dro. S. I, Sir, am Dromio; command him away. Dro. E. I, Sir, am Dromio; pray let me stay. Ant. S. Egeon, art thou not? or else his ghost? Dro. S. O, my old master! who hath bound him here? Abb. Whoever bound him, I will loose his bonds, And gain a husband by his liberty.— Speak, old Egeon, if thou be'st the man That hadst a wife once called Emilia, That bore thee at a burden two fair sons: O, if thou be'st the same geon, speak, And speak unto the same milia! Ege. If I dream not, thou art Æmilia; Abb. By men of Epidamnum, he, and I, Duke. Why, here begins his morning story right; Ant. S. No, Sir, not I; I came from Syracuse. Duke. Stay, stand apart; I know not which is which. Ant. E. I came from Corinth, my most gracious lord. Dro. E. And I with him. Ant. E. Brought to this town by that most famous warrior Duke Menaphon, your most renowned uncle. Adr. And are not you my husband? Ant. E. No, I say nay to that. Ant. S. And so do I, yet did she call me so; Ang. That is the chain, Sir, which you had of me. Ant. S. This purse of ducats I received from you, I see, we still did meet each other's man, Ant. E. These ducats pawn I for my father here. Abb. Nenowned duke, vouchsafe to take the pains To go with us into the abbey here, And hear at large discoursed all our fortunes And all that are assembled in this place, That by this sympathized one day's error 74 MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING. Come, go with us; we'll look to that anon: Have suffer'd wrong, go, keep us company, The duke, my husband, and my children both, Go to a gossip's feast, and go with me; Duke. With all my heart, I'll gossip at this feast. Dro. S. Master, shall I fetch your stuff from ship- Ant. E. Dromio, what stuff of mine hast thou embark'd? [Exeunt ANT. S. and ANT. E., ADR., and Loc. Dro. S. There is a fat friend at your master's house, That kitchen'd me for you to-day at dinner; She now shall be my sister, not my wiie. Dro. E. Methinks you are my glass, and not my Dro. E. That's a question: how shall we try it? Dro. E. Nay, then thus: We came into the world, like brother and brother; ACT I. SCENE I-Before LEONATO's House. Enter LEONATO, HERO, BEATRICE, and others, with a Messenger. Leon. I learn in this letter, that Don Pedro of Arragon comes this night to Messina. Mess. He is very near by this; he was not three leagues off when I left him. Leon. How many gentlemen have you lost in this action? Mess. But few of any sort, and none of name. Leon. A victory is twice itself, when the achiever I find here, that Don brings home full numbers. Pedro hath bestowed much honour on a young Florentine, called Claudio. Mess. Much deserved on his part, and equally remembered by Don Pedro. He hath borue himself beyond the promise of his age; doing, in the figure of a lamb, the feats of a lion: he hath, indeed, better bettered expectation, than you must expect of me to tell you how. Leon. He hath an uncle here in Messina will be very much glad of it. Mess. I have already delivered him letters, and there appears much joy in him; even so much, that joy could not shew itself modest enough without a badge of bit terness. Leon. Did he break out into tears? Leon. A kind overflow of kindness: there are no Mess. I know none of that name, lady; there was none such in the army of any sort. Leon. What is he that you ask for, niece? was. Beat. He set up his bills here in Messina, and challenged Cupid at the flight: and my uncle's fool, read ing the challenge, subscribed for Cupid, and challenged him at the bird-bolt.-I pray you, how many hath he killed and eaten in these wars? But how many hath he killed? for, indeed, I promised to eat all of his killing. Leon. Faith, niece, you tax signior Benedick too much; but he'll be meet with you, I doubt it not. Mess. He hath done good service, lady, in these wars. Beat. You had musty victual, and he hath holp to eat it he is a very valiant trencherman, he hath an excellent stomach. Mess. And a good soldier too, lady. Beat. And a good soldier to a lady;-but what is he to a lord? Mess. A lord to a lord, a man to a man; stuffed with all honourable virtues. Beat. It is so, indeed; he is no less than a stuffed man: but for the stuffing,-Well we are all mortal. Leon. You must not, Sir, mistake my niece: there is a kind of merry war betwixt signior Benedick and her; they never meet but there is a skirmish of wit between them. Beat. Alas, he gets nothing by that! In our last conflict, four of his five wits went halting off, and now is the whole man governed with one: so that if he have wit enough to keep himself warm, let him bear it for a difference between himself and his horse; for it is all the wealth that he hath left, to be known a reasonable creature.-Who is his companion now? He hath every month a new sworn brother. Mess. Is it possible? Beat. Very easily possible: he wears his faith but as the fashion of his hat, it ever changes with the next block. Mess. I see, lady, the gentleman is not in your books. Beat. No: an he were, I would burn my study. But, I pray you, who is his companion? Is there no young that will make a voyage with him to the squarer now, devil? Mess. He is most in the company of the right noble Claudio. Beat. O Lord! he will hang upon him like a disease: he is sooner caught than the pestilence, and the taker runs presently mad. God help the noble Claudio; if |