And her oppressors congregated, and suddenly, by like tranceformation, they became a Bull; and the Bull breathed upon the helpless Virgin in seeming compassion; and she lifted her eyelids as in hope, but yet preserved her harp-like form. And the Bull bellowed forth UNION, and seized on the harp; and while he bellowed, he hoofed it for music, and he broke some of the cords; but the Virgin was not therefore the more released, but remained bound. And from time to time the Beast bellowed and whined, and struck upon the harp; but he only drew forth dirge-like sounds, and awakened the Virgin from her stupor to a renewed sense of her wrongs and bondage. And thus, ever and anon, as he pleased, did the Bull; until the Virgin struggled with her entire strength, and sent forth a piercing shriek of Lamentation, and a loud and terrible cry for Emancipation; and her wailing was heard in far distant countries, even unto Byzantium. And the Bull was amazed, and drew back, and became silent; and he looked at the Virgin, even as a fool looketh when he assumeth gravity. And then I started from my reverie, and again beheld the fiercely burning embers before me, and ruminated on what I had just before written concerning Ireland and the late Lord Lieutenant, and his letter to the Catholic Primate, and on THE D AND THE B, and what was meant by Settlement; and I took up my pen and wroteTHE A. T They say the D.'s a clever man, Plague take such friends: for, if the D. POOR HUMPHREY says he'll be, for that, NOW IN ENGLAND HE GRAND MASTER OF THE ADEPTS. Lovers of the Occult Arts are to know, that this Eminent Person, by continued Study, and constant Correspondence with the BRETHREN OF THE ORDER throughout the World, hath profound Knowledge of the Private Influences in the TRANSMU TATION OF METALS; and that he hath attained to the power of causing that whatever he putteth his hand to shall be convertible into GOLD. He hath fixed himself in the Metropolis; and he maketh PROJECTION publicly, Every Day, on the Royal Exchange, within 'Change Hours. TO THE READER. POOR HUMPHREY here craveth permission to take his last farewell, and finally withdraw for the present Year. Why the preceding pages were put together, every discriminating person must know as well as I, who am sensible of their anomalies, and yet content to let them go as they are. February, 1829. W. HONE. Notabenea. EFFECTS OF THE BRITISH ALMANAC. I. POOR ROBIN, and II. SEASON ON THE SEASONS, } Dead. III. PARTRIDGE, at the last gasp. IV. FRANCIS MOORE, Physician, lying (past recovery) in a languishing condition. THE publication of the British Almanack for 1828, under the superintendence of the Society for the Diffusion of Useful Knowledge, was one of the greatest benefits which such a Society could have conferred upon the people. 1. POOR ROBIN is no more. He expired, like the Laird of Dumbiedikes, blaspheming and calling for brandy. His last words were a compound of drivelling idiocy, and heartless depravity. The abo minations which cannot be reprinted, were mixed up with such ab surdities as "If it don't snow I don't care. It may if it pleases, And then I sneezes, And my nose blow." 2. SEASON ON THE SEASONS, one of the weakest and most stupid of the astrological cheats, is also defunct. 3. PARTRIDGE, in his predictions calculated "for the meridian of London," tells the intelligent people of this metropolis, that the eclipse of the moon, in October 1829, " may be considered to relate to Portugal and Spain, betokening insurrections, troubles, and discords." He blasphemously maintains in his almanac for 1828, that "the moon is the true giver of life." But he will find that the moon cannot save him in his extremity. 4. FRANCIS MOORE, Physician, fell into a desperate scrape which he could not read in the stars. Every one recollects that the months of July and August, 1828, were remarkably rainy throughout Eng land-that a great deal of hay was in consequence lost-and that much of the wheat-crop was badly housed, so that a considerable deficiency was the unfortunate result. Look at MOORE'S Almanac for 1828, upon which, we blush to say it, many_credulous agriculturists still rely. What says this false prophet? July 7 to 24.—“ Fair and hot with a serene atmosphere; good weather for the hay season. Look back at the Times of the 22d of July. Several columns are filled with lamentable accounts of extraordinary rains nearly all over England, and particularly in the northern countries, where the greater part of the hay was destroyed. But Again, in MOORE'S Almanac for August, from the 7th to the 26th we have these words: "Fine harvest weather about the middle of the month. Again, rather variable, though not much rain." from the 10th to the 26th of August, the columns of the newspapers were filled with the most anxious speculations about the unprecedented rainy weather, which had been general, not only in England, but throughout Europe. We will give two or three short paragraphs from the Times as examples :- August 15.—“ The money market at the commencement of business presented a very gloomy appearance this morning. The heavy rain of last night, which has continued during the whole of to-day, seems to have justified in the minds of some of the stockholders the most desponding prognostics of national calamity." "The state of the weather has not of late differed in France from what it has been in this country. Rains have been abundant in almost all its provinces." August 26." The last advices from Amsterdam state that much business was carrying on in corn in the commercial market of that capital. The accounts received there from all the northern corngrowing countries of Europe speak of the damage incurred by the crops from the late continual rains, in consequence of which a general rise in the price of the article had taken place." So much for FRANCIS MOORE's "fine harvest weather about the middle of the month." For more concerning FRANCIS MOORE, Physician, and others of the fraternity of Astrological Almanac makers, see an article in the LONDON MAGAZINE for December 1828, whence this is extracted.. DISENCHANTMENT OF A SORCERER. As GASSENDI was one day taking a morning's walk near Digne, in Provence, his ears were assailed by repeated exclamations of "A sorcerer, a sorcerer ! " On looking behind him he beheld a mean and simple-looking man, with his hands tied, whom a mob of the country-people were hurrying to prison. Gassendi's virtues and learning had given him great authority with them, and he desired to be left alone with the man. They immediately surrendered him,' and Gassendi said to him in private, "My friend, you must tell me sincerely whether you have made a compact with the Devil or not: if you confess it, I will give you your liberty immediately; but if you refuse to tell me, I will give you directly into the hands of the magistrate." The man answered, "Sir, I will own to you that I go to a meeting of wizards every day. One of my friends has given me a drug which I take to effect this, and I have been received as a sorcerer these three years." He then described the proceedings at these meetings, and spoke of the different devils as if he had been all his life acquainted with them. "Show me," said Gassendi, "the drug that you take to enable you to attend this infernal assembly, for I intend to go there with you to-night." The man replied, "As you please, sir; I will take you at midnight as soon as the clock strikes twelve." Accordingly he met Gassendi at the appointed hour, and showing him two boluses, each of them the size of a walnut, he desired him to swallow one, as soon as he had seen him swallow the other. The man swallowed one, and Gassendi pretended as if he had swallowed the other, and then they laid down together upon a goat-skin. The man soon fell asleep, but Gassendi remained awake and watched him, and perceived that he was greatly disturbed in his slumbers, and writhed and twisted his body about, as if he had been troubled by bad dreams. At the expiration of five or six hours he awoke, and said to Gassendi, "I am sure, sir, you ought to be satisfied with the manner in which the Great Goat received you: he conferred upon you a high honour when he permitted you to kiss his tail the first time he ever saw you." The deleterious opiate had operated upon his imagination. He was one in whom, while waking, the eye works Gassendi, compassionating his weakness and credulity, took pains to convince him of his self-delusion; and showing him the bolus, he gave it to a dog, who soon fell asleep and suffered great convulsions. The poor fellow was set at liberty to undeceive his brethren, who had, like him, been lulled by the noxious bolus into imagining themselves sorcerers. FAIRIES. THERE are some very pretty notions in verse on the love of order and cleanliness among the Good People of our old popular Mythology. They were famous slut-pinchers; and celebrated, withal, for dressing themselves gallantly. MAB, The Fairy Queen, condescends to her subjects in a ditty intitled with her own name, wherein she says,— When mortals are at rest And, if the house be foul There we pinch their arms and thighs; So much for punishment of offences; next, as in moral justice, comes re ward for services : But if the house be swept, And from uncleanness kept, We praise the household maid, And duly she is paid: To drop a tester in her shoe. Dr. RICHARD CORBET, Bishop of Norwich, speaks of this practice in the outset of A proper New Ballad, entitled, THE FAIRIES FAREWELL. Farewell Rewards and Fairies! For now foul sluts in dairies Do fare as well as they : And though they sweep their hearths no less Than maids were wont to do, The cheerful Prelate afterwards says, in praise of the Good People, To the same effect HERRICK, who wrote the glorious poem, Corinna's going a Maying, gives goodly counsel and caution to household maids, If will with Mab find grace, ye Set each platter in his place; Water in, ere sun be set. Wash your pails, and cleanse your dairies, Sluts are loathsome to the Fairies: The state Dresses of their high and mighty little Majesties are always described as suitable to their quality. I am directed by a friend to two pieces on this subject in The Rhapsody, (8vo. 1750,) and with some befitting alterations, they are at the reader's service. The first, which I since find to have been abridged from Poole's English Parnassus, is on THE KING. Upon a time the Fairy elves, They wrought a cobweb-shirt more thin And lined with humming bees' soft plush, His hosen and his cassock were His girdle was a wreath of pearls To sweep the hearth, and clean the pot. His hat was all of ladies' love, So passing light that it would move But stirr'd the air in pasing by. The next, in a different measure, closes with a verse of agreeable satire, and ends the entertainment somewhat abruptly— |