But a strange compound of all these uniting Gluttony. You, sir, a Cyrenean, as I take you, There's Diodorus - begging is too good for him Where is it? Squandered, vanished, gone forever: Stop, my good friend, you cry: not quite so fast! - The only free gift that the gods gave man, AMPHIS. [Alive in B.C. 332; no other date known.] DRINK and play, for life is fleeting; short our time beneath the sky; But for death, he's everlasting when we once have come to die. DIODORUS. [Of Sinope. Exhibited in 354.] THIS is my rule, and to my rule I'll hold,- When your foe dies, let all resentment cease: Make peace with death, and death shall give you peace. DIONYSIUS. [Of Sinope. About the same time as Nicostratus.] The Cook. THE true professor of the art should strive To gratify the taste of every guest; For if he merely furnishes the table, Sees all the dishes properly disposed, And thinks, having done this, he has discharged His office, he's mistaken, and deserves To be considered only as a drudge, A kitchen drudge, without an art or skill, A master of his trade. He bears the name Of general, 'tis true, who heads the army: And how to conquer them, this is the man To boil, to roast, to stew, to fricassee, To blow the bellows or to stir the fire; But a professor of the art regards The time, the place, the inviter, and the guest; Most choice receipts, and curious inventions On actual practice and experiment. Having no fixed and settled laws by which Which if we do not well improve, the art HENIOCHUS. [Of this period; dates unknown.] The Demon Guests. THESE are towns of every sort, Which have been crazy now since long ago. Well then, what are these cities doing here? They came here once to sacrifice to freedom When they were nearly freed from forced exactions: After that sacrifice their recklessness Destroyed them, entertaining stranger guests Day after day upon the multiple throne; Namely, two women that have stirred them up, Always twin lived: Democracy the name Of one is, Aristocracy the other; Through whom they've acted since most drunkenly! MNESIMACHUS. [Of this period; dates unknown.] The Fireeaters. Dost know whom thou'rt to sup with, friend? I'll tell thee: With gladiators, not with peaceful guests; Instead of knives we're armed with naked swords, And swallow firebrands in the place of food; Daggers of Crete are served us for confections, And for a plate of pease a fricassee Of shattered spears; the cushions we repose on Of slings and arrows, and our foreheads wreathed With military ensigns, not with myrtle. TIMOCLES. [About B.C. 350-320. Said to have revived the energy of political comedy.] Demosthenes. BID me say anything in preference; But on this theme, Demosthenes himself Charged to the teeth with battering rams and spears Beats down opposers; brief in speech was he, The Ungrateful Mistress. Wretch that I am, She had my love when a mere caper-gatherer, The Lessons of Tragedy. Nay, my good friend, but hear me! I confess In which we breathe, hath cares enough to plague us; And he who meditates on others' woes Shall in that meditation lose his own. Call then the tragic poet to your aid, Hear him, and take instructions from the stage. A spectacle of poverty and pain, Wretched in both. And what if you are poor? Are you a demigod? are you the son Of Hercules? begone! Complain no more. Doth your mind struggle with distracting thoughts? Do your wits wander? are you mad? Alas! And match your love with hers. You're lame of foot And make no more complaint. But you are old, XENARCHUS. [Contemporary of Timocles.] Tricks of the Trade. POETS indeed!—I should be glad to know And sterling impudence. The law forbids, Why thus when one of them perceives the board Look dry and change their color, he begins A pre-concerted quarrel with his neighbor. Gasping for breath; another, who the while And scatters a few drops of water on his friend, Then empties the whole vessel on the fish, Which makes them look so fresh you want to swear They were just taken from the sea. |