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ago, to read such books, saying they were legal, and set me a-poring over myself, instead of looking to Christ. I unfortunately took this advice, and thus have healed my wounds slightly; and said peace to myself, before I was thoroughly convinced of sin. The wall which has been daubed with untempered mortar, is now coming down. My breaches appear, and I find I am a poor, vile, abominable sinner at this day, continually offending God ;-at times I am so miserable, that I am ready to give all up. I went to-day to Barnton, and had preaching again in the great room, to about seventy of the workmen and labourers : the text was Matthew xxiv. 44. “ Therefore, be ye also ready; for in such an hour as ye think not, the Son of Man cometh.”—I felt very happy in procuring them this instruction, and was perhaps too much lifted up; and the Lord permitted me to be assaulted by a grievous temptation in my way home, which filled me with grief and horror at the depth of sin which I perceived in
my heart, and the little power I have over it. If the Lord did not restrain me, I should surely bring great reproach on his name by outward sins also. I cannot think that any one, who has heard and believed the gospel, is so vile as I am. But, o blessed Jesus, didst thou not cast seven devils out of Mary Magdalene ?-speak the word, and I also shall be delivered.
Friday, June 15.-I find it always a loss to my soul when I neglect to write, as I have done for a week past. I grow careless; and forget at what a distance I yet am from God. I have heard many excellent sermons this last week, and have been in various frames. Yesterday I had a sweet persuasion that I belonged to God, and should live to praise him.This morning a young woman called upon me, by her father's desire, that I might speak to her about her soul. She was an utter stranger to me, and I felt ashamed and averse to speak to her. Sensible how unfit I was to speak to her as I ought, I begged of God to help me, and to put words in my mouth; and I may truly say he opened my lips. Bless the Lord, O my soul, for this. Make thine own word, which thou gavest me to speak, effectual, O Lord, to the conversion and salvation of this poor soul !
Monday, June 18.-—I got once more to Barnton, where Mr H-preached to the labourers, from Isaiah lv. 6, 7. “ Seek ye the Lord while he may be found : call ye upon him while he is near. Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return unto the Lord, and he will have mercy upon him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.”—Some of them were affected. I have seen much of the goodness of God this day in interposing in my behalf when I returned home; and although I had, by my exceeding great unworthiness, deserved to suffer, yet I was saved from the trials I feared, and at the same time my heart was humbled by pain of body, which I have ever found a needful medicine to my soul.
Lady Glenorchy at Taymouth-Is an eminent example of diligence in
business, united with fervour of spirit_Grows in the divine life Makes her will, and appoints Lady Maxwell executrix-Extracts from Diary from July 10, to September 30, 1770_Letters from Lady Glenorchy to Lady Maxwell—Lady Glenorchy returns to Edinburgh
- There enjoys the means of grace in great abundance Account of her religious experience Extracts from Diary, from October 26, to December 31, 1770.
LADY GLENORCHY in the end of June went to Taymouth, and remained there till the beginning of October following, managing the domestic affairs of that great and magnificent establishment. This was an employment which might be thought, considering her age, (for she was not yet twenty-nine,) the delicacy of her constitution, and the bad state of her health, would have fully occupied the whole of her time and talents, and left her little leisure for any thing else ; yet, in reading her Diary at this period, one might be led to suppose, that early and late, and all the day long, she was only employed in works of piety and benevolence. She certainly was a most eminent example of diligence in business, united with fervour of spirit in serving the Lord. Still she was not satisfied with herself, or what she did. She thought she never could do enough ; and what she did do, she considered as stained with most mortifying imperfection. She was always striving to do somewhat more, and praying fervently that she might do it better. Considering her circumstances, her youth, her rank, her wealth, her power, her trials, and the society in which, although reluctantly, she was obliged to mingle, and the very strong allurements to which she was exposed, her activity, her humility, her spirituality, and her fidelity, were truly surprising, and pointed her out as a wonderful and admirable monument of the grace of God. The truth of this remark will strikingly appear in the following extracts from the Diary, and letters which she wrote during this period to her friend Lady Maxwell. The intelligent reader will observe, too, in these extracts, how very much Lady Glenorchy's practice of writing a Diary tended to promote and strengthen the divine life in her soul, particularly from the account she gives of her experience on the return of her birth-day this year. Notwithstanding that self-abasement still continued, and in fact ever did continue to be a strong feature in her character, she evidently acknowledges herself to have made decided advances in her spiritual life. Her graces seem to have been improved, and her resolution of doing good greatly confirmed. This will appear to much advantage, if we attend to what passed in her mind, when, from the circumstance of her making her will, and appointing Lady Maxwell her executrix, she conceived herself to be on the very borders of eternity.
July, 10.—I have been prevented, by the hurry of removing my family to this place, from continuing my Diary. I feel I am losing ground fast, and resolve through grace to set out afresh in the Christian course. Gracious Lord, grant me thy strength; undertake for me; turn thou me, and I shall be turned ; draw me, and I will run after thee.
July 11.-I awoke this morning with great longings after Christ, and desires for perfect conformity to his image, and resolved to live to him through the day; but no sooner did I go into company, than my thoughts were dissipated. After breakfast I got some little revival by prayer. The rest of the day I spent in work, and hearing the life of Mr Hogg read.
I feel condemned at having done nothing for the souls of my fellow-creatures, nor having redeemed much time for prayer. Lord help me, for I am weak !
Sunday, July 15.-For some days the Lord has been pleased to visit me with sickness-blessed be his name for this. I had great need of correction. Alas, I fear I stand still in need of much more. But did not Christ come to seek and to save those who were lost ? Did he not die for the ungodly? Surely then he came to die for me, to save me ;—this is my hope. O that thou wouldst now witness this truth to my soul by thy Holy Spirit, and cause it rejoice in thee, my God and Saviour !
Sunday, July 22.- This week past I have lived an inactive life, yet the Lord has given me some few opportunities of speaking for him, and of relieving the bodily wants of the poor. He has also delivered me from temptation. I observe, that by prayer we may obtain all things consistent with the will of God. I have found it to be so this week.
July 24.-Last night the Lord was pleased to give me a sight of my great distance from him, and my sloth and negligence in seeking him in a way of duty. He hath shown himself to me to-day as a prayer hear.