Laertes. In with her then: (The coffin is put into the grave) and if, as gossips tell, Old maids are destin'd to lead apes in hell, May'st thou be one in my poor sister's train. Hamlet. What, my old sweetheart! We're bewitch'd, 'tis plain (h). Queen. (Scattering flowers) Instead of this, as I'm a living sinner, I thought t'have had soon a good wedding-dinner. [The Gravedigger about to throw the earth into the grave. DUETT.-LAERTES AND HAMLET. (Tune-" Nancy Dawson.") Laertes. Sexton, throw aside your spade, Don't be in so much haste, my blade; Once more I'll buss the bonny maid, [Leaps into the grave. Now cover up the quick and dead, And pile your dust upon my head, "Till of this flat a mount you've made Hamlet (advancing). Who's ranting in so fine a strain? Laertes. Pray, who are you? Hamlet. Hamlet, the Dane. Laertes. I'm glad I've caught you here again— Now dam'me but I'll choak thee. [Springs out of the grave, and catches Hamlet by the throat. Hamlet. Let go my throat-don't squeeze so tight; For, tho' I'm not the first to fight, I'll thump you to your heart's delight,— I'll fight for her (so hold your mag) Come tell me what you'll do, Sir? I'll rant as well as you, Sir. [Exeunt Hamlet and Horatio. Queen. Alas, he's crack'd! Awhile he'll growl like Towzer (i) : Anon, he's patient as a hungry mouser (k). King. Good Gertrude, see your crazy son you make fast. [Exit Queen. And now, Laertes, we'll go home to breakfast. [Exeunt King, Laertes, &c. &c. SCENE V. A Hall in the Palace. Enter HAMLET and HORATIO. Hamlet. Horatio, I am sorry for this squabble; Enter OSRICK. Osrick. (To Hamlet) His Majesty hath made a match for you, Sir, To spar with young Laertes-a prime bruiser ;- That you, my lord, will give the first knock down. They're all assembled, and but wait for you. Hamlet. Lead on: I'll fight him, Sir: I ne'er felt bolder. SCENE VI. The Court of Denmark. Flourish of trumpets and drums. KING and QUEEN seated-LAERTES, OSRICK, Marcellus, BERNARDO, GENTLEMEN, and LADIES, discovered. Enter HAMLET and HORATIO. King. To put an end to squabble, strife, and noise, Hamlet. [To Hamlet and Laertes. (To Laertes) Sir, I have done you wrong, and sorely rue it, But, on my word, I didn't go to do it; Therefore, let's make it up ;-come, don't be hard on Laertes. Enough; no man can do more than beg pardon. We're friends. Hamlet. With all my heart. Come, let's set to. Bring me the gloves Laertes. And bring me a pair too. Aye, my Lord; You've back'd the worser man tho', on my word. King. I'm not afraid; I'm sure you'll not fight shy; Laertes. These gloves are much too tight-another pair Hamlet. Mine fit.-Are his as soft as mine? Osrick. All's fair. King. If i' th' two first rounds Hamlet hit most blows, |