Something too much of this.— Horatio. Your lordship sent for me? Hamlet. Pray what's the reason To smoke out treason. You must with me in a good joke unite: To represent my dad's untimely end. To do't in style I've made great preparations- If not, this spectre is a lying elf, And I have all this time been drunk or dreaming My lord, we will. Horatio. [Flourish of Trumpets and Drums. Hamlet. - This trumpeting and drumming Give notice that the King and Queen are coming. To keep the joke up I must idle be; Go to your place, and keep a seat for me. A GRAND MARCH. Enter POLONIUS, KING, QUEEN, OPHELIA, ROSENCRANTZ, GUILDENSTERN, OSRICK, MARCELLUS, BERNardo, GENTLEMEN, and LADIES. King. How fares our cousin Hamlet? Hamlet. Tightly, tightly; I eat the air :-You can't feed pigs so lightly. King. Pooh!-Nonsense Sir!-Such words I don't acknow ledge. Hamlet. (To Pol.) You told me, Sir, you acted once at college. Polonius. I acted Cæsar-Brutus laid me lower. Hamlet. A brute, indeed, to kill so great a bore! Queen. Come, sit by me, dear Hamlet, whilst they're acting. Hamlet. I'd rather not; here's metal more attracting. (To Ophelia) Ophelia, may I lie upon your knees? Ophelia. O, surely; or wherever else you please. Hamlet. Look at mamma-She's grinning, by the pow'rs, Two months. Ophelia. Hamlet. So long? Nay then I'll turn the tables; The deuce take black; I'll have a suit of sables. Ophelia. Pray, what's the play, my Lord? Hamlet. I've ne'er a bill; I cannot tell;-but that rum jockey will. THE CURTAIN RISES. Enter 2d ACTOR as Prologue. For us, and for our pantomime, We beg you'll give us grace and time (h). [Exit. D THE PANTOMIME (¿). SCENE.-A garden. Enter Duke and Duchess-They embrace-Vow eternal love and constancy-Duke suddenly taken ill-Duchess alarmed -Shrieks-Enter a Page-Exit-and return with a bottle and glass-Duchess fills the glass for Duke, whilst she herself receives consolation from the bottle-Duke intimates that he feels his end fast approaching-Duchess strikes her forehead, clasps her hands, &c. &c.—(the usual pantomime signs of distress.)-Vows never to survive him-at least, to live single ever after-Duke shakes his head in a manner as expressive as possible of the monosyllable "fudge" -Duchess points to the cieling, (the pantomime mode of swearing), and exhibits a scroll thus inscribed: They embrace-Duke gently reclines his head over his right shoulder, and meets it with the palm of his right hand (pantomime for "sleepy")-Duchess takes the hint-Reaches a chair-Duke seats himself-Sleeps-Snores-Duchess points to the Duke-Presses her heart-Points to the cieling -and exit. You'll find they are but jesting in the end. O, 'twas a scurvy trick; but that all nonsense is But if the cap fit you, why, you may wear it. The pantomime continued. Enter Duke's nephew-Listens whether the Duke is asleep-Takes a bottle from his pocket-Attempts in vain to draw the cork--Exit And return with a corkscrew and a funnel-Draws the cork-Puts the funnel to Duke's ear-Pours the contents of the bottle into it-A noise-Exit in haste. Hamlet. Is not the case of the poor Duke a hard one? |