Mrs. Can. From one immediately But here comes Lady Sneerwell; perhaps she knows the whole affair.

Enter LADY SNEERWELL.

Lady Sneer. So, my dear Mrs. Candour, here's a sad affair of our friend Lady Teazle!

Mrs. Can. Ay, my dear friend, who would have thought

Lady Sneer. Well, there is no trusting appearances; though, indeed, she was always too lively for me.

Mrs. Can. To be sure, her manners were a little too free; but then she was so young!

Lady Sneer. And had, indeed, some good qualities.

Mrs. Can. So she had, indeed. But have you heard the particulars? Lady Sneer. No; but every body says that Mr. Surface

Sir Benj. Ay, there; I told you Mr. Surface was the man. Mrs. Can. No, no: indeed the assignation was with Charles. Lady Sneer. With Charles! You alarm me, Mrs. Candour! Mrs. Can. Yes, yes; he was the lover. Mr. Surface, to do him justice, was only the informer.

Sir Benj. Well, I'll not dispute with you, Mrs. Candour; but, be it which it may, I hope that Sir Peter's wound will not

Mrs. Can. Sir Peter's wound! Oh, mercy! I did n't hear a word of their fighting.

Lady Sneer. Nor I, a syllable.

Sir Benj. No! what, no mention of the duel ?

Mrs. Can. Not a word.

Sir Benj. Oh, yes: they fought before they left the room.

Lady Sneer. Pray let us hear.

Mrs. Can. Ay, do oblige us with the duel.

Sir Benj. Sir, says Sir Peter, immediately after the discovery,

you are a most ungrateful fellow.

Mrs. Can. Ay, to Charles

Sir Benj. No, no-to Mr. Surface-a most ungrateful fellow; and old as I am, sir, says he, I insist on immediate satisfaction.

Mrs. Can. Ay, that must have been to Charles; for 't is very unlikely Mr. Surface should fight in his own house.

Sir Benj. Gad's life, ma'am, not at all-giving me immediate satisfaction. On this, ma'am, Lady Teazle, seeing Sir Peter in such danger, ran out of the room in strong hysterics, and Charles after her, calling out for hartshorn and water; then, madam, they began to fight with swords.

Enter CRABTREE.

Crab. With pistols, nephew pistols! I have it from undoubted authority.

Mrs. Can. Oh, Mr. Crabtree, then it is all true!

Crab. Too true, indeed, madam, and Sir Peter is dangerously wounded

Sir Benj. By a thrust in second quite through his left side

Crab. By a bullet lodged in the thorax.

Mrs. Can. Mercy on me! Poor Sir Peter!

Crab. Yes, madam; though Charles would have avoided the matter, if he could.

Mrs. Can. I told you who it was; I knew Charles was the person. Sir Benj. My uncle, I see, knows nothing of the matter.

Crab. But Sir Peter taxed him with the basest ingratitude

Sir Benj. That I told you, you know

Crab. Do, nephew, let me speak! and insisted on immediate

Sir Benj. Just as I said

Crab. Odds life, nephew, allow others to know something too! A pair of pistols lay on the bureau (for Mr. Surface, it seems had come

home the night before late from Salthill, where he had been to see the Montem with a friend, who has a son at Eton), so, unluckily, the pistols were left charged.

Sir Benj. I heard nothing of this.

Crab. Sir Peter forced Charles to take one, and they fired, it seems, pretty nearly together. Charles's shot took effect, as I tell you, and Sir Peter's missed; but, what is very extraordinary, the ball struck against a little bronze Shakespeare that stood over the fireplace, grazed out of the window at a right angle, and wounded the postman, who was just coming to the door with a double letter from Northamptonshire.

Sir Benj. My uncle's account is more circumstantial, I confess; but I believe mine is the true one, for all that.

Lady Sneer. [Aside.] I am more interested in this affair than they imagine, and must have better information.

[Exit LADY SNeerwell. Sir Benj. Ah! Lady Sneerwell's alarm is very easily accounted for.

Crab. Yes, yes, they certainly do say-but that's neither here nor there.

Mrs. Can. But, pray, where is Sir Peter at present?

Crab. Oh, they brought him home, and he is now in the house, though the servants are ordered to deny him.

Mrs. Can. I believe so, and Lady Teazle, I suppose, attending

him.

Crab. Yes, yes; and I saw one of the faculty enter just before me. Sir Benj. Hey! who comes here?

Crab. Oh, this is he: the physician, depend on 't.

Mrs. Can. Oh, certainly! it must be the physician; and now we shall know.