Wild. To defign, upon my honour.-And I hope my defign will fuccceed.

[Afide. Lure. And what shall I give you for fuch a fine thing? Wild. You'll give me another, you'll give me another fine [Both fing.

thing.

Lure. Shall I be free with you, Sir Harry?

Wild. With all my heart, madam, so I may be free with you.

Lure. Then plainly, fir, I fhall beg the favour to fee you fome other time; for at this very minute I have two lovers in the house.

Wild. Then to be as plain, I must be gone this minute, for I muft fee another miftrefs within these two hours.

Lure. Frank and free.

Wild. As you with me-Madam, your most humble fervant. [Exit. Lure. Nothing can disturb his humour. Now for my merchant and Vizard. [Exit and takes the candles with her.

Enter Parly, leading in Smuggler, drefs'd in woman's cloaths.

Par. This way, Mr. Alderman.

Smug. Well, Mrs. Parly,-I'm oblig'd to you for this trouble, here are a couple of fhillings for you. Times are hard, very hard, indeed; but next time I'll steal a pair of filk stockings from my wife, and bring them to you. What are you fumbling about my pockets for?'

Par. Only fetting the plaits of your gown ;' here, fir, get into this closet, and my lady will wait on you prefently. [Puts him into the closet, runs out, and returns with Vizard.

Viz. Where would't thou lead me, my dear aufpicious little pilot ?

Par. You're almoft in port, fir; my lady's in the clofet, and will come out to you immediately. Viz. Let me thank thee as I ought.

Par. Pihaw, who has hir'd me beft; a

fhillings, or a couple of kiffes ?

[Kiffes her.

couple of

[Exit.

Viz. Yes, madam, they know that like a mole in the carth, I dig deep, but invifible; not like thofe fluttering noify finners, whofe pleafure is the proclamation of their faults; thofe empty flashes, who no fooner kindle, but they muft blaze to alarm the world. But come, madam, you delay our pleasures.

Smug. He furely takes me for the lady Lurewell— fhe has made him an appointment too- but I'll be re⚫ veng'd of both--Well, fir, what are thofe you are fo ⚫ intimate with?

Viz. Come, come, madam, you know very well— thofe who ftand fo high, that the vulgar envy even their crimes, whofe figure adds privilege to their fin, and makes it pafs unqueftion'd: fair, high, pamper'd females, whofe fpeaking eyes, and piercing voice, would arm the ftatue of a Stoic, and animate his cold ⚫ marble with the foul of an Epicure, all ravishing, lovely, and foft, and kind, like you.'

Smug. I'm very lovely and foft indeed! you shall find me much harder than you imagine, friend'-Well, fir, but I fuppofe you've fome other motive befides pleafure?

Viz. Yes, madam, the honestest motive in the world, intereft-You must know, madam, that I have an old uncle, Alderman Smuggler, you have feen him, I fuppofe.

Smug. Yes, yes, I have fome fmall acquaintance with

him.

Viz. 'Tis the most knavish, precife, covetous old rogue, that ever died of the gout.

Smug. Ah! The young fon of a whore! [Afide.] Well, fir, and what of him?

Viz. Hell hungers not more for wretched fouls, than he for ill-got pelf--and yet (what's wonderful) he that would stick at no profitable villainy himself, loves holiness in another he prays all Sundays for the fins of the week paft--he spends all dinner-time in two tedious graces; and what he defigns a bleffing to the meat, proves a curfe to his family-he's the most-' Smug. Well, well, fir, I know him very well.

Viz. Then, madam, he has a swinging eftate, which I defign to purchase as a faint, and spend like a gentleman. He got it by cheating, and should lofe it by deceit. By the pretence of my zeal and fobriety, I'll cozen the old mifer one of these days out of a fettlement and deed of conveyance

Smug. It fhall be a deed to convey you to the gallows, then, ye young dog.

[Afide. Viz. And no fooner he's dead, but I'll rattle over his grave with a coach and fix, to inform his covetous ghoft how genteelly I spend his money.

Smug. I'll prevent you, boy, for I'll have my money bury'd with me.

[Afide. Viz. Blefs me, madam! here's a light coming this way. I must fly immediately; when fhall I fee you,

madam.

Smug. Sooner than you expect, my dear.

Viz. Pardon me, dear madam, I would not be feen for the world. I would fooner forfeit my life, nay my pleasure, than my reputation.

[Exit. Smug. Reputation! Reputation! That poor word fuffers a great deal.-Well! thou art the most accomplish'd hypocrite that ever made a grave plodding face over a dish of coffee and a pipe of tobacco! he owes me for feven years maintenance, and shall pay me by seven years imprisonment; and when I die, I'll leave him the fee-fimple of a rope and a fhilling. [Exit.] Who are these? I begin to be afraid of fome mischief-I wish ⚫ that I were fafe within the city liberties.I'll hide • myself. [Stands clofe. "Enter Butler, with other Servants and Lights. But. I fay there are two fpoons wanting, and I'll fearch the whole houfe-Two fpoons will be no small gap in my quarter's wages..

Serv. When did you mifs 'em, James?

'But. Mifs them! why I mifs them now! in fhort they must be among you, and if you don't return them, I'll go to the cunning-man to-morrow morning; my fpoons I want, and my fpoons I will have.

• Sero.

Cerv. Come, come, fearch about

•[Search and discovers Smuggler. But. Hark'e, good woman, what makes you hide yourfelf? What are you affam'd of?

Smug. Aham'd of? O Lord, Sir, I'm an honeft old woman that never was afham'd of any thing.

But. What are you, a midwife then? fpeak, did • not you see a couple of ftray fpoons in your travels! Smug. Stray fpoons!

But. Ay, ay, ftray fpoons; in fhort you ftole them, and I'll shake your old limbs to pieces, if you don't deliver them prefently.

Smug. Blefs me; a reverend elder of feventy years› old accus'd for Petty Larceny!-Why fearch me, good * people, fearch me; and if you find any spoons about 'me, you shall burn me for a witch.

But. Ay, we will fearch you, mistress.

[They fearch and pull the Spoons out of his pocket. Smug. O the devil, the devil!

But. Where, where is he? Lord blefs us! fhe is a. ⚫witch in good earncft, may be.

Smug. Oh, it was fome devil, fome Covent-Garden or St. James's devil, that put them in my pocket. But. Ay, ay, you shall be hang'd for a thief, burnt, ⚫ for a witch, and then carted for a bawd. Speak what ⚫ are you?

Enter Larewell..

Smug. I'm the Lady Lurewell's nurse.

Lure. What noife is this?

• But. Here is an old Succubus, madam, that has stole two filver spoons, and fays fhe's your nurse.

Lure. My nurfe! O the impudent old jade, I never faw the wither'd creature before..

Smug. Then I'm finely caught. O madam, madam, don't you know me don't you remember bufs and guinea?

Lure. Was ever fuch impudence? I know thee! why ⚫ thou'rt as brazen as a bawd in the fide-box.-Take her before a justice, and then to Newgate, away.

Smug. O! confider, madam, that I'm an alderman.

Lure,