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good, may it be to make thee, at least, as wise a man as thy father?
Enter Miss Jenny and Mrs. MOTHERLY, R Lady W. Oh, here's my daughter, too! Miss Jenny, don't you see your cousin, child ?
Manly. And as for thee, my pretty dear, [Salutes her] mayst thou be, at least, as good a woman as thy mother!
Jenny. (L. c.) I wish I may ever be so handsome, sir.
Manly. Hah, Miss Pert! now that's a thought that seems to have been hatched in the girl on this side Highgate!
[Aside. Sir Fran. Her tongue is a little nimble, sir.
Lady W. That's only from her country education, Sir Francis. You know she has been kept too long there, so I brought her to London, sir, to learn a little more reserve and modesty.
Manly. Oh, the best place in the world for it! every woman she meets will teach her something of it. There's the good gentlewoman in the house looks like a knowing person ; even she, perhaps, will be so good as to show her a little London behaviour.
[’Squire and Jenny retire up the Stage, and
pluy awkwardly. Mrs. M.*[Back of c.) Alas, sir, miss won't stand long in need of my instructions !
Manly. That, I dare say.-What thou canst teach her, she will soon be mistress of.
[Aside. Mrs. M. If she does, sir, they shall always be at her service.
Lady W. Very obliging, indeed, Mrs. Motherly!
Sir Fran. Very kind and civil, truly! I think we are got into a mighty good hawse here.
Manly. Oh yes ; and very friendly company.
Count B. Humph! 'Egad I don't like his looks-he seems a little smoky-I believe I had as good brush off. If I stay, I don't know but he may ask me some odd questions.
[Aside. Manly. Well, sir, I believe you and I do but hinder the family.
Count B. It is very true, sir-I was just thinking of going.-He don't care to leave me, I see; but it's no matter, we have time enough. [Aside.)-And so, ladies, without ceremony, your humble servant.
[Exit, L. and drops a Letter.
Lady W. Ha! what paper's this ! Some billet-doux, i'll lay my life ; but this is no place to examine it.
[Puts it in her pocket. Sir Fran. Why in such haste, cousin ?
[Jenny leaves the 'Squire, and comes forward. Manly. Oh, my lady must have a great many affairs upon her hands, after such a journey!
Lady W. I believe, sir, I shall not have much less every day while I stay in this town, of one sort or other.
Manly. Why, truly, ladies seldom want employment here, madam.
Jenny. (L. c.) And mama did not come to it to be idle, sir.
Manly. Nor you neither, I dare say, my young mistress?
Jenny. I hope not, sir.
Manly. Ha, Miss Mettle ! [Sir F. crosses, L.] Where are you going, sir ?
Sir Fran. Only to see you to the door, sir.
Manly. Oh, Sir Francis, I love to come and go without ceremony !
Sir Fran. (L.) Nay, sir, I must do as you will have memyour humble servant.
[Exit Manly, L. Jenny. This cousin Manly, papa, seems to be but of an odd sort of a crusty humour; I don't like him half so well as the count.
[Returns to 'Squire. Sir. Fran. Pooh! that's another thing, child. Cousin is a little proud, indeed! but, however, you must always be civil to him, for he has a deal of money; and nobody knows who he may give it to.
['Squire and Jenny fighting in the background. Lady W. Psha! a fig for his money! you have so many projects of late, about money, since you are a Parliament man! What, we must make ourselves slaves to his impertinent humours, eight or ten years, perhaps, in hopes to be his heirs ! and then he will be just old enough to marry his maid.
Mrs. M. Nay, for that matter, madam, the town says he is going to be married already.
Sir Fran. (L.C.) Who! cousin Manly ?
Mrs. M. Why, is it possible your ladyship should know nothing of it? To my Lord Townly's sister, Lady Grace !
Lady W. (L.) Lady Grace !
Mrs. M. Dear madam, it has been in the newspapers. Lady W. I don't like that, neither.
[’Squire comes forward, L. Sir Fran. (R. C.) Naw I do; for then it's likely it mayn't be true.
Lady W. [Aside.] If it is not too far gone, at least it may be worth one's while to throw a rub in his way.
’Squire R. (L.) Pray, feyther, haw long will it be to supper?
[Jenny comes forward, R. Sir Fran. Odso, that's true! Step to the cook, lad, and ask what she can get us.
Mrs. M. If you please, sir, I'll order one of my maids to show her where she may have any thing you have a mind to.
[Exit, R. Sir Fran. Thank you kindly, Mrs. Motherly.
'Squire R. (c.) Odds flesh ! what is not it i'the hawse yet? I shall be famished-but hawld! I'll go and ask Doll, an there's none oʻthe goose poy left.
Sir Fran. (c.) Do so-and, dost hear, Dick ? see if there's e'er à bottle o' the strong beer that came i'th' coach with us : if there be, clap a toast in it, and bring
'Squire R. (L. c.) With a little nutmeg and sugar, shawn'a I, feyther?
Sir Fran. Ay, ay; as, thee and I always drink it for breakfast. Go thy ways. [Exit 'Squire Rich., L.
Lady W. This boy is always thinking of his belly.
Sir Fran. Why, my dear, you may allow him to be 2 little hungry after his journey.
Lady W. Nay, even breed him your own way. He has been cramming, in or out of the coach, all this day, I am sure. I wish my poor girl could eat a quarter as much.
Jenny. (L.) Oh, as for that, I could eat a great deal more, mamma: but then, mayhap, I should grow coarse, like him, and spoil my shape.
[Crosses to R. Enter 'SQUIRE RICHARD, with a full Tankard, L. 'Squire R. (L.) Here, feyther, I ha' browght it. It's well I went as I did; for our Doll had just bak'd a toast, and was going to drink it herself. Sir Fran. (L. c.) Why, then, here's to thee, Dick!
[Drinks. Squire R. Thonk you, feytber. Ludy W. (R.C.) Lord, Sir Francis, I wonder you can encourage the boy to swill so much of that lubberly liquor! It's enough to make him quite stupid !
Squire R. Why it never hurts me, mother; and I sleep like a hawnd after it.
[Drinks. Sir Fran. I am sure I ba' drunk it these thirty years, and, by your leave, madam, I don't know that I want wit, ha! ha!
Jenny. (R.) But you might have had a great deal more, papa, if you would have been governed by my mother.
Sir Fran. Daughter, he that is governed by his wife has no wit at all.
Jenny. Then I hope I shall marry a fool, sir; for I love to govern, dearly!
[Runs about. Sir Fran. You are too pert, child; it don't do well in a young woman.
Lady W. Pray, Sir Francis, don't snub her; she bas a fine growing spirit, and if you check her so, you will make her as dull as her brother there.
'Squire R. (After a long draught.] Indeed, mother, I think my sister is too forward.
Jenny. [Back of c.] You i you think I'm too forward! Sure, brother mud! your head's too heavy to think of any thing but your belly.
Lady W. Well said, miss! He's none of your master, though he is your elder brother.
'Squire R. No, nor she shawnt be my mistress, while she's younger sister.
Sir Fran. Well said, Dick! Show them that stawt liquor makes a stawt heart, lad ! Squire R. So I will! and I'll drink agen, for all her.
· [Drinks. Enter John MOODY, L. Sir Fran. (c.) So, John, how are the horses ?
Moody: (L.) Froth, sir, I ha' na’ good opinion o’this tawn; it's made up o' mischief, I think.
[Lady W. retires up the stage, and sits. Sir Fran. What's the matter naw ?
Moody. Why, I'll tell your worship-before we were gotten to the street end, with the coach, here, a great luggerheaded cart, with wheels as thick as a brick wall, laid hawld o't, and has poo'd it aw to bits-crack went the perch! down goes the coach! and wang says the
glasses all to shivers ! Marcy upon us! and this be London, 'would we were aw weel in the country ageen !
Jenny. (R.) What have you to do, to wish us all in the country again, Mr. Lubber? I hope we shall not go into the country again these seven years, mamma; let twenty coaches be pulled to pieces.
Sir Fran. Hold your tongue, Jenny. Was Roger in no fault in all this?
Moody. Noa, sir, nor I poither. Are not yow ashamed, says Roger to the carter, to do such an unkind thing by strangers ? •Noa, says he, you bumpkin. Sir, he did the thing on very purpose ! (Jenny retires, and sits.] and so the folks said that stood by. Very well, says Roger, yow shall see what our meyster will say to ye. Your meyster, says he ; your meyster may kiss my and 80 he clapp'd his hand just there, and like your worship. Flesh! I thought they had better breeding in this town.
Sir Fran. (c.) I'll teach this rascal some, I'll warrant him! Oddsbud, if I take him in hand, I'll play the devil with him!
'Squire R. (R.) Ay, do, feyther; have him before the Parliament.
Sir Fran. Oddsbud, and so I will! I will make him know who I am. Where does he live?
Moody. I believe in London, sir.
[’Squire retires. Sir Fran, Where's that? Moody. By my troth, sir, I doan't know! I heard him say he would cross the same street again to-morrow; and if we had a mind to stand in his way, he would pooll us over and over again.
Sir Fran. Will he so ? Odzooks, get me a constable !
Lady W. [Coming forward, R.] Poob, get you a good supper! Come, Sir Francis, don't put yourself in a heat for what can't be helped. Accidents will happen to people that travel abroad to see the world. For my part, I think it's a mercy it was not overturned before we were all out on't.
Sir Fran. Why, ay, that's true again, my dear.