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another passenger, near to a garden in which a young dog was bewailing its loss of liberty by making day "hideous with its cries," which all the party agreed was a very disagreeable noise. The Hibernian, desirous to display his wit, and to quiz the parson, said, “The animal was so unpleasantly noisy, it must be a Presbyterian dog." Mr Toller calmly, but with apparent confidence, said, "I am sure it is an Irish dog."—" How do you know that?" exclaimed the young man, with eagerness.-"I know it, sir," replied the divine, "by its impudence and its howl." This seasonable retort cured the garrulity of the youth, who preserved a dogged silence till the stage arrived at the Exchange.

This anecdote reminds us of an equally smart retort given by a priest to a commercial traveller. In the days of mailcoaches a loquacious bagman and a priest happened to travel "insides," the rest of the company consisting of two young ladies. Desirous of showing off his wit, the traveller chose the priest for his butt, and, among other things, proposed the question, What is the difference between an ass and a priest?" His reverence, after some thought, gave it up. “Why,” said the triumphant commercial, "the priest has a cross on his breast, whilst the ass has one on his back."—"Very good,” smiled the priest. "Now allow me to propose a riddle in my

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turn. What is the difference between a commercial traveller and an ass.” The bagman made several guesses, but at last was compelled to admit he "did not know."-" Nor I either," was the calm retort.

BISHOPS AND BOAT-RACING.

HE late Bishop of New Zealand (now Bishop of Lichfield) delivered an address at the Sheldonian Theatre, at Oxford, at the close of 1867, in the course of which he made mention of the fact that he was one of the three

bishops who rowed in the first Oxford and Cambridge race, the other two being the Bishop of Newcastle and the Bishop of St Andrews. The bishop might have added that the Cambridge boat, in which he and Bishop Tyrrel formed part of the crew, was beaten by the Oxford, in which Bishop Wordsworth rowed.

HUET AND ST EXUPERIUS.

HEN the portrait of the celebrated Huet, Bishop of Avranches, was first published in France, it appears that the prelate's fame was not sufficient to raise a demand for his likeness, and the artist appeared to be in danger of losing his labour. But the man who has only one string to his bow will never make a figure or a fortune in this world; the name of Huet was erased from the plate, and that of St Exuperius, the imaginary first Bishop of Bayeux, substituted in its place; which being done, the portrait, now become that of a saint, had a great run, and amply repaid the ingenuity of the engraver.

AN INVETERATE SMOKER.

IN William Lilly's (the astrologer) "History of Life and Times," we find the following extraordinary account of a Buckinghamshire parson, who abandoned himself to smoking tobacco :—“In this year, 1633, was living William Bredon, parson or vicar of Thornton, in Bucks, a profound divine, and absolutely the most polite person for nativities in that age, strictly adhering to Ptolomy, which he well understood. He was so given over to tobacco and drink, that when he had no tobacco, he would cut the bell-ropes of his church and smoke them!"

PREACHING FOR A HAT.

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PRACTICAL DEMONSTRATION.

IN the palmy days of boxing, a certain bruising parson, of the name of Day, being examined at the Old Bailey on some point, the counsel of the opposite party, according to the laudable custom of the court, attempted to browbeat him. "I believe you are called the bruising parson," said he. am," answered the reverend divine, "and if you doubt it, and will come out of court, I will give it you under my hand."

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AGREEABLE VALEDICTION.

EFORE the first Bishop of New Zealand left England, Sydney Smith, in taking leave, affected to impress upon his friend the dangers of his mission. "You will find," he said, "in preaching to cannibals, that their attention, instead of being occupied by the spirit, will be concentrated on the flesh; for I am told that they never breakfast without a cold missionary on the sideboard." In shaking hands with the new prelate, as he was leaving the house, Smith added, "Good-bye. We shall never meet again, but let us hope that you may thoroughly disagree with the savage that eats you."

PREACHING FOR A HAT.

HE following is extracted from a letter by Shenstone, the poet, to Mrs A., dated 1778:

"Please to observe that I am but just arrived at home, though I left Cheltenham the day after you. I stayed, indeed, to hear Mr B. preach a morning sermon, for which I find Mrs C. has allotted him the hat, preferably to Mr C. Perhaps you may not remember, nor did I hear it till very lately, that there

is a hat given at Cheltenham for the use of the best foreign preacher, of which the disposal is assigned to Mrs C., to her and her heirs for ever. I remember, though I knew nothing of this whilst I was upon the place, I used to be a little misdeemful, that all who preached there had some such premium in their eye. This hat, 'tis true, is not quite so valuable as a cardinal's hat; but while it is made a retribution for excellence in so, if properly considered, sublime a function, it is an object for a preacher in any degree. I am sorry, at the same time, to say that, as a common hat, merely for its uses, it would be an object to too many country curates, whose situations and slender means too often excite our blushes as well as compassion. There should be no such thing as a journeyman parson; it is beneath the dignity of the profession."

PREACHING AND PROPHESYING.

NE day the minister of a Scotch village, who on Sundays was more indebted to his manuscript than to his memory, called unceremoniously at a cottage, whilst its occupant, a pious parishioner of the old school, was engaged in reading a chapter of one of the prophets. "Weel, John,” familiarly inquired the clerical visitant, "what is this you are about?" "I am prophesying," was the prompt reply. "Prophesying!" exclaimed the astounded divine, “I doubt ye mean reading a prophecy." "Aweel," argued the rustic, "gif reading a preachin' be preachin', isna reading a prophecy prophesying?"

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BISHOP BATEMAN.

OBERT LORD MORLEY having killed some deer in the park of Bishop Bateman, and ill-treated his servants, this proud prelate made the peer do public penance for the offence, by walking uncovered and barefoot, with a wax

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taper of six pounds in his hands, through the city of Norwich to the cathedral, and there caused him to beg his pardon. And all this was done, notwithstanding the king's express order to the contrary, and though his Majesty had seized the bishop's revenues for his obstinacy.

PULPIT FLATTERY.

NE of the first acts performed by George III. after his accession to the throne, was to issue an order, prohibiting any of the clergy who should be called to preach before him, from paying him any compliment in their discourses. His Majesty was led to this from the fulsome adulation which Dr Thomas Wilson, prebendary of Westminster, thought proper to deliver in the Chapel Royal, and for which, instead of thanks, he received from his royal auditor a pointed reprimand,—his Majesty observing "that he came to chapel to hear the praises of God, and not his own." This circumstance operated wonderfully on the reverend orator, as from that moment he became a flaming patriot. The doctor took part with Wilkes, was made liveryman of the Joiners' Company, and lavished large sums upon Mrs Macaulay, the republican historian, in whose honour he caused a marble statue to be erected in his church at Walbrook. This, however, before he died, he caused to be removed -not, indeed, so much from a sense of the impropriety of the thing, as out of resentment to the lady, who had incurred his displeasure by her marriage.

DR SOUTH.

HEN this witty divine was incumbent of Caversham, in Oxfordshire, he was called out of bed on a cold winter's morning by his clerk, to marry a couple who were there waiting for him. The doctor hurried up, and went shivering to

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