WHITFIELD'S ELOQUENCE.

III

the following terms: "O Lord, we pray thee to send us wind; no a rantin', tantin', tearin' wind, but a noohin', soughin', wirnin' wind."-" More expressive words than these," says Dean Ramsay, "could not be found in any language."

THREE GREAT NECESSITIES.

N the middle of July 1633, three Puritan clergymen, named Cotton, Stone, and Hooker, set sail for New England, where they landed safely at Boston, in the month of September following. The people there used merrily to say, in reference to the names of the three ministers, that their three great necessities would now be supplied; for they had Cotton for their clothing, Stone for their building, and Hooker for their fishing.

DEAN SWIFT.

IN attorney in Dean Swift's company took great liberties of conversation with him. At length this impudent limb of the law asked the dean: 66

Supposing, doctor, that the parsons and the d-1 should litigate a cause, which party do you think would gain it ?"-"The d-1, no doubt," replied the dean, as he would have all the lawyers on his side."

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WHITFIELD'S ELOQUENCE.

R FRANKLIN, in his Memoirs, bears witness to the extraordinary effect which was produced by Mr Whitfield's preaching in America, and relates an anecdote equally characteristic of the preacher and of himself. "I happened," says the doctor, "to attend one of his sermons, in the

course of which I perceived he intended to finish with a collection, and I silently resolved he should get nothing from me. I had in my pocket a handful of copper money, three or four silver dollars, and five pistoles in gold. As he proceeded, I began to soften, and resolved to give the copper. Another stroke of his oratory made me ashamed of that, and determined me to give the silver; and he finished so admirably, that I emptied my pocket wholly into the collector's dish, gold and all. At this sermon there was also one of our club, who, being of my sentiments respecting the building of Georgia, and suspecting a collection might be intended, had by way of precaution emptied his pockets before he came from home. Towards the conclusion of the discourse, however, he felt a strong inclination to give, and applied to a neighbour who stood near him to lend him some money for the purpose. The request was, fortunately, made to perhaps the only man in the company who had the firmness not to be affected by the preacher. His answer was, 'At any other time, friend Hodgkinson, I would lend to you freely; but not now, for you seem to be out of your right senses.""

B

BISHOP BURNET.

ISHOP BURNET was extravagantly fond of smoking

and of study. In order to enjoy both at the same time, he perforated the broad brim of his hat, and, putting a long pipe through it, puffed and wrote, and wrote and puffed again. He was a remarkably absent man in company. When the celebrated Prince Eugene was in London, the prelate earnestly entreated the Duke of Marlborough to allow him to meet the prince at his table. Bishop," said the duke, "you know how forgetful you are; will you be punctual?”—“Your grace may depend upon me." Prince Eugene, observing the bishop. at table, inquired very politely of him whether he was ever in Paris. “Yes, an please your Highness," said the bishop, "I

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was there in the very same year the Princess de Soissons was taken up on suspicion of poisoning her husband." The good bishop quite forgot that this lady happened to be the mother of Prince Eugene, and, to make matters worse, recollected it after he had made the above blundering remark!

TALKING AT CHURCH.

N some parish churches it is the custom to separate the men from the women. A clergyman being interrupted by loud talking, stopped short, when a woman, eager for the honour of her sex, arose and said: "Your reverence, the noise is not among us."—" So much the better," answered the priest; "it will be the sooner over."

B

EPISCOPAL HUMOUR.

ISHOP MARLEY had a good deal of the humour of Swift. Once, when the footman was out of the way, he ordered the coachman to fetch some water from the well. To this the coachman objected, that his business was to drive, not to run on errands. “Well, then,” said Marley, “bring out the coach and four, set the pitcher inside, and drive to the well"—a service which was several times repeated, to the great amusement of the village.

A HINT FROM THE PULPIT.

HEN the Duke of Ormond, whose family name was Butler, went over as Lord-Lieutenant of Ireland, the vessel was driven, by stress of weather, into the Isle of Man, where his grace was hospitably entertained by the curate

H

of the place, named Joseph. The agreeable manners of his landlord induced the duke to inquire into his circumstances, and finding that they were but indifferent, he promised to provide for him as soon as he should be settled in his vice-regalty. Joseph waited many months in the hope of hearing from his patron, but being disappointed, he resolved to go over to Dublin, to remind him of his promise. Despairing of gaining access to the duke, he waited upon Dean Swift, and asked his permission to preach at the cathedral the next Sunday. The dean, delighted with his conversation, gave his consent. On the day in question, the lord-lieutenant, with his court, were all at church, and sat opposite to the pulpit. None of them had any recollection of Joseph till after naming his text, which was in Genesis xl. 23: "Yet did not the chief butler remember Joseph, but forgat him.” He made so pointed an allusion to the duke, and his entertainment in the Isle of Man, that his features were recognised, and when the sermon was done, he was invited to the castle and a good living provided for him.

A PIOUS JOKE.

HE Rev. Dr Alexander relates that there lived in Peeblesshire a half-witted man, who was in the habit of saying his prayers in a field behind a turf-dyke. One day, he was followed to this spot by some wags, who secreted themselves on the opposite side, listening to the man at his devotions, who expressed his conviction that he was a very great sinner, and that even were the turf-dyke at that moment to fall upon him, it would be no more than he deserved. No sooner had he said this, than the persons on the opposite side pushed the dyke over him, when, scrambling out, he was heard to say: “Hech, sirs! it's an awfu' world this; a body canna say a thing in a joke, but it's ta'en in earnest."

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BISHOP BONNER.

HEN Henry VIII. proposed to send Bishop Bonner to
France, in a diplomatic capacity, the king told him that

he must speak to the French monarch in a very lofty tone, at the same time instructing him what he had to say. "Please your Majesty," quoth the bishop, " if I should hold such haughty language, King Francis, in all probability, would order my head to be chopped off."-"If he dared to do such a thing," cried Henry, "I would chop off the heads of ten thousand Frenchmen for it."-" Truly, your Majesty," objected Bonner, "but, perhaps, not one of those heads would fit my shoulders."

REPARTEE.

|HARLES II., playing at tennis with a dignified prebend, who had struck the ball well, exclaimed: "Not a bad stroke for a dean!" "I'd give it the stroke of a bishop," said Mr Dean, "if your Majesty pleases."

THE RIGHTS OF THE CHURCH.

HEN Molière, the play writer, died, the Archbishop of Paris would not let his body be buried in consecrated ground. Louis XIV. being informed of this, sent for the archbishop, and expostulated with him about it; but finding the prelate inflexible, his Majesty asked how many feet deep the consecrated ground reached? This question coming by surprise, the archbishop replied, "About eight."-" Well," answered the king, "I find there is no getting the better of your scruples; therefore let his grave be dug twelve feet deep, that's four below your consecrated ground, and let him be buried there."