Set. No, no; never fear me, sir-I privately inform'd the knight of the treachery; who has agreed, seemingly to be cheated, that the captain may be so in reality.

Sharp. Where's the bride?

Set. Shifting clothes for the purpose, at a friend's house of mine. Here's company, coming; if you'll walk this way, sir, I'll tell you. [Exeunt.

Enter BELLMOUR, BELINDA, ARAMINTA, and

VAINLOVE.

Vain. Oh, 'twas frenzy all: cannot you forgive it? -Men in madness have a title to your pity.

[To Araminta. Ara. Which they forfeit when they are restor'd to their senses.

Vain. I am not presuming beyond a pardon.

Ara. You, who could reproach me with one counterfeit, how insolent would a real pardon make you? But there's no need to forgive what is not worth my anger.

Bel. O'my conscience, I could find in my heart to marry thee, purely to be rid of thec- -At least, thou art so troublesome a lover, there's hopes thou❜lt make a more than ordinary quiet husband.

[To Bellmour. Bell. Say you soIs that a maxim among ye? “Bel. .Yes: you fluttering men of the mode have "made marriage a mere French dish.

"Bell. I hope there's no French sauce. [Aside.

"Bel. You are so curious in the preparation, that "is, your courtship, one would think you meant a "noble entertainment-But when we come to feed, "tis all froth and poor, but in show. Nay, often, "only remains, which have been I know not how many "times warm'd for other company, and at last serv'd "" up cold to the wife.

"Bell. That were a miserable wretch indeed, who "could not afford one warm dish for the wife of his "bosom-But you, timorous virgins, form a dreadful "chimera of a husband, as of a creature contrary to "that soft, humble, pliant, easy thing, a lover; so guess at plagues in matrimony, in opposition to the pleasures of courtships. Alas! courtship to mar❝riage, is but as the music in the play-house, 'till the "curtain's drawn; but that once up, then opens the "scene of pleasure.

86

"Bel. Oh foh-no: rather, courtship to marriage, as a very witty prologue to a very dull play."

Enter SHARPER.

Sharp. Hist,Bellmour; if you'll bring the ladies, make haste to Silvia's lodgings, before Heartwell has fretted himself out of breath.

Bell. You have an opportunity now, madam, to revenge yourself upon Heartwell, for affronting your squirrel. [To Belinda.

Bel. Oh, the filthy rude beast.

Ara. 'Tis a lasting quarrel: I think he has never been at our house since.

Bell. But give yourselves the trouble to walk to that corner-house, and I'll tell you by the way what may divert and surprize you.

[Exeunt.

SCENE IV.

Silvia's Lodgings. Enter HEARTWELL and Boy. Heart. Gone forth, say you, with her maid ? Boy. There was a man too that fetch'd 'em outSetter, I think they call him.

Heart. Soh-That precious pimp too-Damn'd, damn'd strumpet! Could she not contain herself on her wedding-day! Not hold out till night! O, cursed state! How wide we err, when apprehensive of the load of life,

-We hope to find

That help which nature meant in womankind,
To man that supplemental self design'd;
But proves a burning caustic when apyly'd,

And Adam, sure, could with more ease abide

The bone when broken, than when made a bride.

Enter BELLMOUR, BELINDA, VAINLOVE, and ARAMINTA.

Bell. Now, George, what rhyming: I thought the chimes of verse were past, when once the doleful marriage knell was rung.

Heart. Shame and confusion! I am exposed.

[Vainlove and Araminta talk apart.

Bel. Joy, joy, Mr. Bridegroom; I give you joy, sir. Heart. 'Tis not in thy nature to give me joy-A woman can as soon give immortality.

Bel. Ha, ha, ha! O gad, men grow such clowns when they are marry'd.

Bell. That they are fit for no company but their wives.

Bel. Nor for them neither, in a little time I swear, at the month's end, you shall hardly find a marry'd inan that will do a civil thing to his wife, or say a civil thing to any body else. How he looks already! Ha, ha, ha!

Bell. Ha, ha, ha!

Heart. Death! Am I made your laughing-stock? For you, sir, I shall find a time; but take of your wasp here, or the clown may grow boisterous: I have a fly-flap.

Bel. You have occasion for 't, your wife has been blown upon.

Bell. That's home.

Heart. Not friends or furies could have added to my vexation, or any thing else, but another woman— You've rack'd my patience; begone, or by

Bell. Hold, hold! What the devil, thou wilt not draw upon a woman?

Vain. What 's the matter?

Ara. Bless me! What have you done to him? Bel. Only touch'd a gall'd beast 'till he winch'd. Vain. Bellmour, give it over; you vex him too much; 't is all serious to him.

Bel. Nay, I swear, I begin to pity him myself. Heart. Damn your pity-But let me be calm a little

-How have I deserv'd this of you, any of ye? Sir, have I impair'd the honour of your house, promis'd your sister marriage, and seduc'd her? Wherein have I injur'd you? Did I bring a physician to your father when he lay expiring, and endeavour to prolong his life, and you one and twenty? Madam, have I had an opportunity with you and baulk'd it? Did you ever offer me the favour and I refus'd it? Or

Bel. Oh, foh! What does the filthy fellow mean? Lard, let me begone.

Ara. Hang me, if I pity you; you are 1ight enough serv'd.

"Bel. This is a little scurrilous tho'.

Vain. "Nay, 't is a score of your own scratching-” Well, George

Heart. You are the principal cause of all my present ills. If Silvia had not been your mistress, my wife might have been honest.

Vain. And if Silvia had not been your wife, my mistress might have been just-There we are evenbut have a good heart, I heard of your misfortune, and am come to your relief.

Heart. When execution's over, you offer a reprieve.

Vain. What would you give?

Heart. Oh! any thing, every thing, a leg, or two,

or an arm:

I would be divorc'd from nay, "lity, to be divorc'd from my wife."