54 But, 'sdeath, it is but a may-be, and upon scurvy terms-Well, farewell then-if I can get out of sight, I may get the better of myself. Sil. Well-good bye. [Turns and weeps. Heart. Ha! Nay, come, we'll kiss at parting. [Kisses her.] By Heav'n her kiss is sweeter than liberty -I will marry theeThere, thou hast don't. resolves melted in that kiss- -One more. All my Heart. I'm impatient 'till it be done; I will not give myself liberty to think, lest I should cool-I will about a licence straight-in the evening expect me- -One kiss more to confirm me mad; so. [Exit Heart. Sil. Ha, ha, ha! an old fox trapp`d. Enter LUCY. Bless me! you frighted me, I thought he had been come again, and had heard me. "Lucy. Lord, madam, I met your lover in as much "haste, as if he had been going for a midwife. "Sil. He's going for a parson, girl, the forerunner "of a midwife, some nine months hence-Well, “I find dissembling to our sex is as natural as swim"ming to a negro. We may depend upon our skill to save us at a plunge, though till then we never "make the experiment."-But how hast thou succeeded? 66 Lucy. As you would wish-since there is no reclaiming Vainlove; I have found out a pique she has taken at him; and have fram'd a letter that makes her sue for reconciliation first. I know that will dowalk in and I'll shew it you. Come, Madam, you 're like to have a happy time on 't, both your love and anger satisfied!-All that can charm our sex conspire to please you. That woman sure enjoys a blessed night, ACT IV. SCENE I. The Street. Enter BELLMOUR, in Fanatick Habit, and SETTER. Bellmour. Tis pretty near the hour. [Looking on his «watch.] Well, and how, Setter, ha, does my hypocrisy fit me, ha? Does it sit easy on me? Set. O, most religiously well, sir. "Bell. I wonder why all our young fellows should glory in an opinion of atheism; when they may be "so much more conveniently lewd under the coverlet "of religion." Set. 'Shud, sir, away quickly, there's Fondlewife just turn'd the corner, and 's coming this way. Bell. Gads so, there he is, he must not see me. Enter FONDLEWIFE and BARNABY. Fond. I say, I will tarry at home. Bar. But, sir.. Fond. Good lack! I profess the spirit of contradiction has possessed the lad—I say I will tarry at home, varlet. Bar. I have done, sir, then farewel five hundred pounds. Fond. Ha, how's that? Stay, stay, did you leave word, say you, with his wife? With Comfort, herself. Bar. I did, and Comfort will send Tribulation hither as soon as ever he comes home-I could have brought young Mr. Prig, to have kept my mistress company in the mean time: but you say Fond. How, how, say, varlet! I say let him not come near my doors, I say he is a wanton young Levite, and pampereth himself up with dainties, that he may look lovely in the eyes of women-Sincerely I am afraid he hath already defiled the tabernacle of our sister, Comfort; while her good husband is deluded by his godly appearance--I say, that even lust doth sparkle in his eyes, and glow upon his cheeks, and that I would as soon trust my wife with a lord's high-fed chaplain. Bar. Sir, the hour draws nigh-and nothing will be done there 'till you come. Fond. And nothing can be done here 'till I go-So that I'll tarry, d'ye see. Bar. And run the hazard to lose your affair, sir. Fond. Good lack, good lack—I profess it is a sufficient vexation for a man to have a handsome wife. Bar. Never, sir, but when the man is an unsufficient husband. 'Tis then like the vanity of taking a fine house, and yet be forced to let lodgings, to help to pay the rent. Fond. I profess a very apt comparison, varlet. Go, and bid my Cocky come out to me; I will give her some instructions; I will reason with her before I go. [Exit Bar.] And in the mean time I will reason with myself Tell me, Isaac, why art thee jealous ; why art thee distrustful of the wife of thy bosom? Because she is young and vigorous, and I am old and impotent Then, why didst thee marry, Isaac ?Because she was beautiful and tempting, and because I was obstinate and doating; so that my inclination was, and is still greater than my power"And will not that which tempted thee, also tempt others, who will tempt her, Isaac ?I fear it much -But does not thy wife love thee, nay, doat upon thee?YesWhy then! Ay, but to say truth, she's fonder of me than she has reason to be; and in the way of trade, we still suspect the smoothest dealers of the deepest designs-And that she has some designs deeper than thou canst reach, th' hast experimented, Isaac-But, mum.. Enter LETITIA. Lat. I hope my dearest jewel is not going to leave meare you, Nykin? Fond. Wife-have you thoroughly considered how detestable, how heinous, and how crying a sir, the sin of adultery is? Have you weigh'd it, I say? Lat. Bless me, what means my dear! Fond. [Aside.] I profess she has an alluring eye; I am doubtful whether I shall trust her, even with Tribulation himself- -Speak, I say, have you considered what it is to cuckold your husband? Lat. [Aside.] I am amaz'd: sure he has discovered nothing-Who has wrong'd me to my dearest? I hope my jewel does not think that ever I had any such thing in my head, or ever will have. Fond. No, no, I tell you I shall have it in my head. Læt. [Aside.] I know not what to think. But I'm resolved to find the meaning of it-Unkind dear! Was it for this you sent to call me? Is it not affliction enough that you are to leave me, but you must study to encrease it by unjust suspicions? [Crying.] Well, well-you know my fondness, and you love to tyrannize-Go on, cruel man, do; triumph over my poor heart, while it holds, which cannot be long, with this usage of your's-But that's what you want Well, you'll have your ends soon- -You willYou will-Yes, it will break to oblige you. [Sighs. Fond. Verily I fear I have carried the jest too far. Nay, look you, now, if she does not weep-'tis the fondest fool-Nay, Cocky, Cocky, nay, dear Cocky, don't cry, I was but in jest, I was not, ifeck. Lat. [Aside.] O then, all 's safe. I was terribly frighted My affliction is always your jest, barbarous man! Oh, that I should love to this degree! yet Fond. Nay, Cocky. 2 |