My strong bent for letters induced me first to procure an introduction into the good company of the learned; and I went to a dinner where several of the literati were to be assembled, full of the hopes of having my mind enlightened with knowledge, expanded with sentiment, and charmed with the atticism of elegant conversation.

During our meal, there was a more absolute sus'pension of discourse, than I expected in a society of 'spirits so refined as those with whom I was associated. The ordinary functions of eating and drinking "made no part of my idea of a learned man; and I could observe in my fellow guests an attention to the 'dishes before them, which I thought did not quite correspond with the dignity of that character. This, however, was but a small deviation, from my picture, and I passed it over as well as I could, in expectation of that mental feast with which I was to be regaled when the table should be uncovered.

Accordingly, when the cloth was removed, the conversation, which I expected with so much impatience, began. I had too humble an opinion of myself to take any other part than that of a hearer; but I very soon discovered that I was the only person in the company who had an inclination to listen. Every one seemed impatient of his neighbour's speech, and eager to have an opportunity of introducing his own. You, I think, Mr. Mirror, have compared conversation to a favourite dish at an entertainment; here it was carried on like a dinner at one of those hungry ordinaries, where Quin used wittily to call for a basket-hilted sword to help himself with in a short time, every one, except your correspondent, endeavoured to secure it to himself, by making it a dish which nobody else could taste. "An old gentleman, at the head of the table, introduced a German treatise, written by a man whose name I could neither pronounce nor remember, which,

none of the rest of the company had seen. Another, taking advantage of a fit of coughing with which he was seized, brought us upon a philosophical enquiry into the properties of heat, and a long account of some experiments he had lately witnessed on that subject. Being unfortunately asked for his toast, and pausing a moment to deliberate on it, he was supplanted by my right-hand neighbour, who suddenly transported us into the country of Thibet, and seemed to have a very intimate acquaintance with the Delai Lama. One of the company, who sat opposite to him, thrust in, by mere dint of vociferation, "Travels "through the interior Parts of America," just then published, and sailed over the lakes in triumph; till happening to mention a particular way in which the Indians dress a certain fish, the discourse was, at last, laid open to every body present on the subject of cookery; whence it naturally fell into a discussion of the comparative excellence of different wines; on which topics the conversation rested with so much emphasis, that a stranger, who had overheard it, would have been led to imagine this symposium, into which I had procured admission with so much eagerness to be a society of cooks and butlers, met to improve each other in their several callings.

I next procured an introduction into the very best company; that is, I contrived to become a guest at a table of high fashion, where an entertainment was given to some of the greatest men in this country. The ambition natural to my age and complexion, prompted me to desire this honour; which, however, I purchased at the price of a good deal of embarrassment and uneasiness. Nothing, indeed, but thehigh honour conferred by such society, would compensate for the feelings even of that minute, in which a man, not used to the company of the great, ascends from the lowest step of a wide echoing

stair-case, to the however, and several other

door a great man's drawingroom......Through this,

little disquietudes, did I pass, in hopes of finding, in the discourse of those elevated persons, that highly polished elegance, that interesting information, and, those extensive views of polity and government, which their rank had afforded so many opportunities of acquiring.

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Not only during the time of dinner (as in my last company), but for a considerable time after, the scene was silent and solemn; this, while it added to my confusion, increased my expectations. Conversation at last began; it was carried on in a manner exactly the reverse of that in my former visit. There nobody was disposed to listen; here few seemed inclined to speak; for in this assembly I could perceive there were two or three very great men, to whom the great men were little, and the proud were mean. The last, therefore, hardly spoke at all, except to applaud the observations or anecdotes delivered by the very great men; in which, had they not been delivered by the very great men, I should have discovered no uncommon sagacity or exquisite entertainment. One, who seemed to be at the top of this climax of greatness, began a story of a pretty old date, in which he introduced, at dinner in the house of the then minister, all the orators and wits of the time. Though, from the anecdotes to which I had already listened, my ears were now familiarized with the sounds of duke, marquis, earl, and ambassador; yet, from the history of this illustrious assemblage, I still conceived very eager expectation: but after being led through twenty episodes, all tending to shew the connection of the noble relator with many other right honourable personages, the conclusion proved to be nothing more than a joke upon a country member of parliament, who asked to be helped to a bit of goose, when, in fact, the dish was a swan,

which it seems was a favourite bird at the minister's table; and some conceit about not knowing a swan from a goose, and all the minister's geese being swans, was the point of the story; at which all the company laughed very loud and very long; but the little men, all except myself, infinitely the loudest and the longest.

I began now to think that the charms of convivial and ordinary conversation were not, perhaps, to be expected among men, whose learning, or importance in the state, made it unnecessary for them to cultivate the lesser accomplishments of life; and that I must look for them in the company of the gay, whose minds, unbent from serious and important occupations, had leisure to sport themselves in the regions of wit and humour, and to communicate the liveliness of their fancy to the society around them. I found it no difficult matter to be admitted to a party of this kind; I was introduced, at a public place, to a gentleman, who, I was told, was a man of fashion, and of the world, and was by him invited to a petit souper, where I understood I should meet with some of the liveliest and most entertaining companions of both sexes.

Of the conversation at this house I would give an account if I were able; but so many talked at once, so various and desultory were the subjects on which they talked, and so unintelligibly unfashionable were many of the phrases which they used, that I am altogether unqualified to abridge or analyse it. I find, Sir, there is a jargon among people of fashion as well as among the schoolmen they deride, and that it requires initiation into the mysteries of the one as well as of the other, to be able to comprehend or to relish their discourse. Conversation, however, was soon put an end to by the introduction of cards, when I found a perfect equality of understanding and of importance. At length supper was announced

at a very late hour, and with it entered a gentleman, who, I was informed, possessed an infinite fund of humour, and for whose appearance I had been made to look, for some time, with impatience.

The superiority of his talents for conversation seemed, indeed, to be acknowledged; for he was allowed to talk almost unceasingly, with very little interruption from any other person. After a few

glasses, he was prevailed on to sing one very innocent song; a few more emboldened him to sing another a little more free; and just before the second bottle was called for, he took off a methodist preachr with great applause.

The ladies now retired. I had fancied that in the companies of the two former days, the want of their society had deprived us of the ease and gaiety of discourse. But here the removal of the female members of the party seemed to have a contrary effect from what my conclusion would have warranted. I discovered a smile of satisfaction in the countenance of most of the guests when the ladies were gone. Several of them who had not uttered a syllable before, were eloquent now, though, indeed, the subject was neither abstruse nor delicate. The wit was called on for another song, and he gave us one perfectly masculine. This was followed by several jocular stories, and burlesque exhibitions, most of which were in perfect unison with that tone which the absence of the ladies had allowed the company to assume. The jests were not such as I can repeat; one fancy, however, I recollect, of which, I think, a better use may be made than its author intended. "Suppose," said he, "our words left their marks on the walls, like claret spilt on a smooth table, how confounded the women would look when they next entered the room!" For my part, I have so much reverence for a woman of honour, as to hold sacred even the place she has occupied, and cannot