the Characters, Talents, and Abilities of those who are fit to be employed in the several Branches of the Adminiftration. And when, through an over-weaning Conceit of their own Abilities, and a Contempt of the Judgment and Authority of their Superiors, private Perfons fhall presume wantonly to break out of their proper Circle, and thruft themselves into fuch Offices and Services, as they have neither Call, nor Talents, nor Skill to execute, it must infallibly end in the Damage and Confufion of the Society in general, and the Shame and Contempt of the officious Intruders. Do but confider the State of your own Family, and fee how neceffary it is for the Peace and Profperity of the whole, that every one of your Domeftics fhould have his proper Poft affigned him, agreeable to his Talents, Education, and Way of Life. Should the Helper in the Stables pretend to the Office of Valet de Chambre, the Poftilion turn Cook, and the Whipper-in refolve to be nothing less than Steward or Butler, I fancy neither your Stables, your Kitchen, your Wardrobe, nor your Exchequer, would long be in tolerable Order, your Family in tolerable Peace, nor your Worship in tolera ble Humour.

To this it may be answered, That this Suppofition does, by no means, affect our Cafe; that we are not yet formed into a regular Society, and therefore have no direct Scheme to purfue; that we are all upon the Offenfive; our Business is only to demolish and destroy; and that very little Method or Order is required to effect it; but that Strength and Courage feem fufficient: But this is a dangerous Miftake. There is an Art in demolishing, as well as in building, to do it safely and effectually. He that should attempt to demolish an

old

old Building, and should begin with digging up Foundations, and destroying the Pillars and Buttreffes, will have good Luck if he does not pull an old House upon bis Head. But our Cafe moft nearly resembles thè Siege of a fortified Town; which every one knows is to be effected by Conduct and Perfeverance, rather than by perfonal Courage and Bravery. We are attacking a Fortress that has held it out many Ages against all Sorts of Enemies. The Garrison is well provided with Stores, Ammunition, and Provisions of all Sorts, and can hardly be taken or loft but by the Cowardice and Treachery of its Governors and Commanders. We are not therefore to depend upon the Number, Zeal, or Courage, of an undisciplined Rabble, without Government and Direction; we are not to run our Heads against Stone-walls without Fear or Wit. There must be fome Perfon of a cool Head and a warm Heart to command the Siege, to appoint the Subalterns to their different Posts, according to their different Talents, and the different Circumstances of the Services. The Trenches must be opened, and the Approaches made in due Form, under the Protection of proper Works, and the Direction of fkilful Engineers. Every Man is not fit to command a Siege, or a Party, who yet may manage a Spade or a Pickax, carry a Fascine, throw a Grenado or Stink-pot, or fpring a Mine, whilst those who are to cover the Siege, are to be vigilant and active to intercept Convoys, to prevent the Surprize of any unguarded Poft, or the throwing frefh Succours into the Town, and give fuch Relief, from time to time, as the different Circumstances of the Service may require; but if, instead of this regular Difpofition, a Battalion of PetitsMaitres,

B 4

Maîtres, elegantly dressed in their Birth-day Suits, attended with Fiddles and French Horns, fupported by a Brigade of Dancing-mafters, or a flying Squadron of Fox-hunters, fhould take it in their Heads to make a general Affault, nothing lefs could be expected, than the cutting off the Flower of the Army, and the Lofs of a whole Campaign.

This, I often think, is the nearest Refemblance of our Cafe that can be imagined. Very great Numbers of smart Fellows, and very pretty Gentlemen, are warmly engaged in the Caufe of Liberty and Freethinking, in oppofition to Prieftcraft and Superftition; but, as they have the Misfortune to be under no Direction or Reftraint of cooler and wifer Heads than their own, their Zeal out-runs their Judgment; they miftake their Talents, and put themselves upon uncommanded and improper Services, to the manifest Prejudice and Disgrace of their Cause, and, like unfuccefsful Rebels, give double Spirit and Credit to the Cause they have been oppofing. To speak a plain Truth, which I am fure you must have observed as well as myself, fince the Cause of Free-thinking has become reputable and fashionable, under the Patronage and Affiftance of Men of Wit and Genius, every idle-headed Jackanapes, who has not Talents enough to shine in any other Sphere of Life, takes it in his Head to turn Free-thinker, and thinks himself qualified for the highest Posts, and most difficult Services of the Party. Hence it comes to pafs, that we meet with thefe Gentlemen-Volunteers in almost all Shapes, Forms, Ranks, and Stations of Life. If my Lord or the 'Squire have Understanding enough to fee through, and oppofe, popular Prejudices and pious Frauds impofed

.

pofed upon the Simple and Credulous, under the venerable Name and Mask of Religion, the fame Zeal, without the fame Knowledge, naturally spreads itself through the whole Family. The Valet quickly shines with the caft Wit and Philofophy, as well as the Cloaths, of his Master, to the Difgrace and Contempt of them both: For thofe profound Sentiments and judicious Reflections, which would have been heard with Attention and Applause from his Lordship or his Worship, are fo debafed by paffing through vulgar Mouths, Forms of Speech, and Manner of Expreffion, that they appear contemptible to Men of Sense, and are exposed to the Raillery of every cunning Dif putant, well knowing that the Retailer and Vender of thofe noble Discoveries, has not one Word to fay in Defence of them. Your old Friend, the little Captain, by the conftant Overflowings of his Wisdom and Zeal, has made his whole Family and Neighbourhood almost as wife and eloquent as himself. His very Footmen can joke upon Religion, can banter the Bible and Parson with as good an Air, and almost as much Wit as their Mafter. I was t'other Day diverted and provoked at the fame time, with the grave Impertinence of his Gardener, who came with a very fignificant Face to borrow of me Woollafton's Religion of Nature. Why, Tom, faid I, thou art scarce able to read it, much less to understand it. Never fear, Sir, faid he, if it be against Religion and Parfons, as I am told it is, I warrant you, with a little of my Master's Help, I shall be able to make it out. I dare fay you remember his old Pot-Companion Harry Muddle, who had for fome Years earned his Drink by being obliged to laugh very heartily whenever his Honour attempted

to

to be witty upon Religion and Parfons, in which, by the Help of good Lungs and a round Countenance, he acquitted himself to Admiration. This dull Rogue has at last took it into his Head to affume a Character of his own, and fet up for himself. He ventures nowand-then to retail fome of his Master's wife Sentences, and put them off as his own. He was t'other Night very witty, in his Way, upon Creeds and Creed-makers; and concluded with faying, That it should ever be a Rule with him, not to believe any thing but what he could understand. Upon which Will Dry, who fat fmoking beside him, very gravely lays down his Pipe, and looking archly upon him, Why then, Friend Harry, fays he, I will venture to affirm, thou wilt have the forteft Creed of any Man in Britain. Now, I infift upon it, fuch Fellows as thefe difgrace our Cause, and, by their abfurd Pretenfions to Reason and Free-thinking, render both themselves and their Patrons con→ temptible.-Mistake me not, I would not be thought to discommend or difcourage their Zeal for the good Caufe; no, by no means; they are all heartily welcome; the more the merrier; defendet numerus. ftill, methinks, I would have them all under proper Regulations, that every Man fhould know his Rank and Poft, and be employed in fuch Offices, and fuch only, as are fuited to his Genius and Capacity. This would prevent unspeakable Confufion, and, by steady Patience and Perfeverence, could not fail, in time, of producing fuch Effects as you and I could wish, which can never be produced by the prefent undisciplined giddy Measures of our Free-thinking Brethren.

But

This abfurd Conduct has done us unfpeakable Mifchief, and fo prejudiced Men of cool and confiderate Tempers