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He bought a little country seat--
And here, some time, they lived in clover;
Sir Easy, you must know, was fond of farming;
His fine improvement, he the question put-
"But!" cries the Knight-"but what! why ar'n't they charming ?"
For this exception put him in a fright;
His new Canals and Draining;
In that one word he saw his project's ruin;
For when a man hears talk of butts,
He naturally thinks there's something brewing.
My dear," exclaims his spouse, "The house is much too small,
'Tis scarce an habitation for a mouse-
Now good Sir Easy, at the best,
And nothing did he more detest
As she, alas! had weary grown,
She came, she saw, but still it was not right, Such suits of rooms, of stairs too, such a train; "My dear, Sir Easy, we must move again!"
He moved again, house after house he tried,
He once was fat, but now so thin was grown,
He told her that his spirits could not stand it; Quite to a skeleton this roving wore him,
And certainly for one who loved hilarity, Events like these were quite too moving for him; "Besides," says he,
"What other husband in the world would be Sent like a card of compliments about From house to house?
I say 'tis plaguy hard! And if you mean to keep up this vagary, Drat me, ma'am, but I'd rather be a card! And then, ma'am, if I were sent out, At least, I should be stationary !"
Thus, having given his passion vent,
And two hours after, forth he went
And bought another house,
To make a final trial of his spouse.
He pitched on one i' the outskirts of the City, On which he placed a firm reliance; You couldn't point out one more neat and pretty, "Twas not too large, 'twas not too small; 'Twas not too low, 'twas not too tall;
Neither in country, nor in town,
But set in happy medium down,
Just like St Dunstan's bells between the giants.
My lady viewed it round and round,
Of disappointments how unwitting!
One morn, at breakfast sitting,
The conversation on contentment ran :"My dear," exclaims the knight, in pleasant strain, "You've nothing now of which you can complain."
"No, nothing, love-but-"
Madam, I plainly see
You want to make a butt of me!"
So take it well or take it ill;
ALONZO THE BRAVE.
MATTHEW GREGORY LEWIS.
A WARRIOR SO bold and a virgin so bright,
They gaz'd on each other with tender delight,
"And ah !" said the youth, " since to-morrow I go To fight in a far-distant land,
Your tears for my absence soon ceasing to flow, Some other will court you, and you will bestow On a wealthier suitor your hand."
"Oh! hush these suspicions!" fair Imogene said, "So hurtful to love and to me;
For if you be living or if you be dead,
I swear by the Virgin that none in your stead
"And if e'er for another my heart should decide, Forgetting Alonzo the Brave,
God grant that to punish my falsehood and pride,
To Palestine hastened the warrior so bold,
But scarce had a twelvemonth elapsed, when behold!
A baron all covered with jewels and gold
His treasure, his presents, his spacious domain,
And now had the marriage been blest by the priest, The revelry now was begun,
The tables they groaned with the weight of the feast, Nor yet had the laughter and merriment ceased, When the bell of the castle toll'd-ONE!
'Twas then, with amazement, fair Imogene found A stranger was placed by her side;
His air was terrific, he uttered no sound,
He spoke not, he moved not, he looked not around, But earnestly gazed on the bride.
His vizor was closed, and gigantic his height,
All laughter and pleasure were hush'd at his sight,
His presence all bosoms appeared to dismay,
At length spoke the bride, while she trembled, "I pray, Sir Knight, that your helmet aside you would lay, And deign to partake of our cheer."
The lady is silent, the stranger complies,
O gods! what a sight met fair Imogene's eyes!
All present then uttered a terrified shout,
While the spectre addressed Imogene