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best of every thing for almost one year and nire months, and returned to England wiser and better men than when they left. Anxious as Mr. Wesley had been to be wholly the Lord's, profound as he was in divinity, and scrupulously as he had lived in all godliness, and honesty, he was ignorant an 1 inexperienced in justification by faith, and the renewing of the Holy Ghost. He had worked and suffered for salvation, but had not believed with a heart unto righteousnessHe hoped that he was a Christian, but had no joyful assurance of it, and therefore was more of a servant than a son of God, and was influenced more by fear than love. And yet, according to the prevailing theology of the day, in its brightest and purest aspects, he lacked nothing but continuance in well doing to ensure him the highest enjoyments of religion here, and an inheritance with the saints hereafter.

But light awaited him, as it does every diligent and honest inquirer after truth, and its revelation to his heart was the chief advantage of his mission to America. But this was reflected through a medium that human wisdom would not have suggested, yet in admirable accordance with the simplicity of the divine plan of humbling the pride of man, and of securing all the glory of his salvation to Him to whom it rightfully belongs.

When he embarked for Georgia, he found twenty-six Ger mans on board, all members of the Moravian Church, and deeply experienced in the things of God. Observing their Christian deportment, Mr. Wesley set himself to learn the German language, that he might converse with them. The existence of fear in his own heart, and the exhibition of peculiar graces in the Moravians, gave him much trouble. Referring to them, he said: "I had long observed the great seriousness of their behavior. Of their humility

they had given a continual proof, by performing those servile offices for the other passengers which none of the English would undertake, for which they desired, and would receive, no pay, saying, 'It was good for their proud hearts, and their loving Saviour had done more for them.' And every day had given them occasion of showing a meekness which no injury could move. If they were pushed, struck, or thrown down, they rose again and went away, but no complaint was found in their mouths. There was now an opportunity of trying whether they were delivered from the spirit of fear, as well as from that of pride, anger, and revenge. In the midst of the Psalm wherewith their service began the sea broke over, split the mainsail in pieces, covered the ship, and poured in between the decks as if the great deep had already swallowed us up. A terrible screaming began among the English. The Germans calmly sung on. I asked one of them afterwards, 'Was you not afraid?' He answered, 'I thank God, no.' I asked, 'But were not your women and children afraid?' He mildly replied, No; our women and children are not afraid to die.'"

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The result of all his study and observation during his absence, on his own heart, is stated in his journal. Jan. 8, 1738, he wrote: "By the most infallible of proofs, inward feeling, I am convinced, 1. Of unbelief; having no such faith in Christ as will prevent my heart from being troubled. 2. Of pride, throughout my past life, inasmuch as I thought I had what I find I have not. 3. Of gross irrecollection; inasmuch as in a storm I cry to God every moment, in a calm not. 4. Of levity and luxuriancy of spirit; appearing by my speaking words not tending to edify; but most, by the manner of my speaking of my ene mies. Lord, save, or I perish! Save me, 1. By such a

faith as implies peace in life and death. 2. By such luml ity as may fill my heart from this hour forever with a piereing, uninterrupted sense, that hitherto I have done nothing. 3. By such a recollection as may enable me to cry to thee every moment. 4. By steadiness, seriousness, sobriety of spirits, avoiding, as fire, every word that tendeth not to edify, and never speaking of any who oppose me, or sin against God, without all my own sins set in array before my face."

A few days after, as he was nearing the English shore, he wrote: "I went to America to convert the Indians; but O! who shall convert me? Who is he that will deliver me from this evil heart of unbelief? I have a fair summer religion; I can talk well, nay, and believe myself while no danger is near; but let death look me in the face, and my spirit is troubled. Nor can I say, 'to die is gain.'

'I have a sin of fear, that when I've spun

My last thread, I shall perish on the shore.'"

On arriving home, and reviewing his whole life in the light of divine truth, and the developments of Christian experience he had observed in his German friends, he wrote again: "And now, it is upwards of two years since I left my native country, in order to teach the Georgian Indians the nature of Christianity; but what have I learned myself in the meantime? Why, what I least of all suspected, that I, who went to America to convert others, was never converted myself. I am not mad, though I thus speak; but speak the words of truth and soberness; if haply some of those who still dream may awake, and see that as I am so are they. Are they read in philosophy? So am I. In ancient or modern tongues? So was I also. Are they versed in the science of divinity? I too have studied it many years. Can they talk fluently upon spiritual things? The very

same I could do. Are they plenteous in alms? Behold, 1 give all my goods to feed the poor. Do they give of their labor as well as of their substance? I have labored more abundantly than they all. Are they willing to suffer for their brethren? I have thrown up my friends, reputation, ease, country: I have put my life in my hand, wandering into strange lands; I have given my body to be devoured of the deep, parched up with heat, consumed by toil and weariness, or whatsoever God shall please to bring upon me. But does all this (be it more or less, it matters not) make me acceptable to God? Does all I ever did, or can know, say, give, do, or suffer, justify me in his sight? Yea, or the constant use of all the means of grace? (which, never theless, is meet, right, and our bounden duty,) or that I am, as touching outward righteousness, blameless? Or, (to come closer yet,) the having a rational conviction of all the truths of Christianity? Does all this give me a claim to the holy, heavenly, divine character of a Christian? By no means. If the oracles of God be true, if we are still to abide by the law and the testimony, all these things, though when ennobled by faith in Christ they are holy, and just, and good, yet without it are 'dung and dross.'

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"This, then, I have learned in the ends of the earth, that I am 'fallen short of the glory of God;' that my whole heart is altogether corrupt and abominable;' and consequently my whole life, (seeing it cannot be that an evil tree' should bring forth good fruit,') that my works, my own sufferings, my own righteousness, are so far from reconciling me to an offended God, so far from making any atonement for the least of those sins, which are more in number than the hairs of my head,' that the most specious of them need an atonement themselves, or they cannot abide his righteous judgment; that having the sentence of death

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in my heart, and having nothing in or of myself to plead, I have no hope but that of being justified freely through the redemption that is in Jesus;' I have no hope but that if I seek I shall find the Christ, and be found in him, not having my own righteousness, but that which is of God by faith.'

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"If it be said I have faith, (for many such things have I heard from many miserable comforters,) I answer, so have the devils a sort of faith; but still they are strangers to the covenant of promise. So the apostles had even at Cana in Galilee, when Jesus first manifested forth his glory;' even then they, in a sort, believed on him;' but they had not then the faith that overcometh the world.' The faith I want is 'a sure trust and confidence in God that, through the merits of Christ, my sins are forgiven, and I reconciled to the favor of God.' That faith which enables every one that hath it to cry out, I live not; but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.' I want that faith which none has without knowing that he hath it, is freed from sin, the whole body of sin is destroyed' in him. He is freed from fear, having peace with God through Christ, and rejoicing in the hope of the glory of God.' And he is freed from doubt, having the love of God shed abroad in his heart, through the Holy Ghost which is given unto him; which Spirit itself beareth witness with his spirit that he is a child of God."'

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With these views of his spiritual state, Mr. Wesley left. ao means unemployed to obtain the blessing he so earnestly desired. Count Zinzendorf, the founder and protector of the Moravian Society, a man of learning and deep experience, coming into the country about that time, Mr. Wesley consulted with him, as he did with one Peter Boehler,

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