Chapelain, the French poet, equally famous for fordid avarice, fhabby clothes, and bad verses, used to wear his cloak over his coat in the midst of fummer. Being asked why he did so, he always answered that he was indifpofed. Conrart said to him one day, "It is not you, it is your coat that is indisposed." Pope Urban VIII. having received ill treatment, as he thought, from fome confiderable perfons at Rome, faid, "How ungrateful is this family! To oblige them, I canonized an anceftor of theirs, who did not deferve it."-Quefta gente è molto ingrata: Io ho beatificato uno de loro parenti, che non lo meritava. 1 was told many years ago by a friend, that a certain divine of quarrelfome memory, being charged with fomewhat in the Convocation, rofe up to justify himself, and laying his hand upon his breast, began thus: "I call God to witness," &c." A brother dignitary faid to his next neighbour, "Now do I know that this man is going to tell a lie; for this is his ufual preface on all fuch occafions." Afchines (contra Ctefiph.) faid the very fame thing of Demofthenes, who was perpetually embellishing his orations with oaths. "This man," faid he, "never calls the Gods to witness with more confidence and effrontery, VOL. I. Gg than than when he is affirming what is notoriously falfe." Scudery travelling with his fifter, put up at an inn, and took a chamber for the night, which had two beds. Before they went to fleep, Scudery was talking with his fifter about his romance called Cyrus, which he had in hand. "What shall we do," faid he, "with Prince Mazarus?"" Poifon him," said the lady." No,” said he, “not yet; we shall still want him, and we can dispatch him when we pleafe." After many disputes, they agreed that he fhould be affaffinated. Some tradesmen, who lay in the room adjoining, and divided only by a thin partition, overheard the discourse; and thinking that they were plotting the death of fome of the Royal Family, went and informed against them. They were accordingly feized, fent to Paris, and examined by a magiftrate; who found that it was only the hero of a romance whom they intended to destroy. One of Pere Simon's favourite paradoxes, was his hypothefis of the Rouleaux. He supposed that the Hebrews wrote their facred books upon small fheets of paper, or something that ferved for pa-. per; and rolled them up one over another, upon a ftick; and that these sheets, not being fastened together, it came to pafs, in process of time, that some . fome of them were loft, and others difplaced. We might as well fuppofe, that the artist, who invented a pair of breeches, had not the wit to find fome method to faften them up; and that men walked, for feveral centuries, with their breeches about their heels; till, at length, a genius arose, who contrived buttons and buttonholes.* George, Cardinal d'Amboife, was, as history fays, an Ecclefiaftick, with no more than one benefice, and a Minister of state without covetoufnefs, without pride, and without felf-intereft; whose main defign was to promote the glory of Louis the Twelfth ;-of a Prince, who accounted the prosperity of his subjects to be his greatest honour and glory. About the year 1414, Brikman, Abbot of St. Michael, being at the Council of Conftance, was pitched upon by the Prelates to fay mass, because he was a man of quality. He performed it fo well, that an Italian Cardinal fancied that he must be a Doctor of Divinity, or of Canon Law, and defired to get acquainted with him. He approached, and addressed himself to him in Latin. The Abbot, who knew no Latin, could not anfwer; but, without fhewing any concern, he turned to his own chaplain, and faid, "What Life of Erafmus, Vol. I. p. 27. fhall L fhall I do?" Can you not recollect," faid the Chaplain, the names of the towns and villages in your neighbourhood? Name them to him, and he will think that you talk Greek, and he will leave you." Immediately the Abbot answered the Cardinal," Sturwolt, Hafe, Gifen, BoerscheRavenftede, Drifpenftede, Itzem." The Cardinal afked, if he was a Greek, and the chaplain anfwered, "Yes;"-and then the Italian Prelate withdrew. A Lawyer and a Phyfician difputed about precedence, and appealed to Diogenes. He gave it for the lawyer; and faid, "Let the thief firft, and the executioner follow." go An old woman, who had fore eyes, purchased an amulet, or charm, written upon a bit of parchment, and wore it about her neck,—and was cured. A female neighbour, labouring under the fame diforder, came to beg the charm of her. She would by no means part with it, but permitted her to get it copied out. A poor school-boy was hired to do it for a few pence. He looked it over very attentively, and found it to confift of characters which he could not make out: but, not being willing to lofe his pay, he wrote thus:"The Devil pick out this old woman's eyes, and ftuff up the holes."-The patient wore it about her neck, and was cured alfo. Ligniere Ligniere was a wit, and apt to be rather rough and blunt in converfation. One day a Nobleman boafted before him, that he could tofs up cherries in the air, and catch them, as they came down, in his mouth; and accordingly he began to fhew his skill. Ligniere had not the patience to ftay for the fecond cherry; but faid to him, "What dog taught you that trick?" The Lacedæmonians were remarkable for conçife fpeeches but after their defeat at Leuctra, their deputies, in an affembly of the Greeks, made a very long and warm invective against Epaminondas, who had beaten them. He stood up, and only replied, "Gentlemen, I am glad we have brought you to your fpeech.". D— faid of a ftupid preacher, who was forced to hide for debt, "Six days he is invifible; and on Sundays he is incomprehenfible." When Kufter was at Cambridge, preparing his Suidas, and studying English, an ignorant academician put into his hands L'Eftrange's Fables,the worst book that he could have chofen. Kufter foon complained to him that he could make nothing out of it: "For example,” said he, "here is the word Roytoner, which I cannot find in the dictionary." L'Eftrange had called a Crow a Roystoner.* Royton, in Hertfordshire, is mentioned as 'remarkable for a particular species of these birds. Gg 3 Charles |